DXM and Depersonalization

[MasterDestroyer]

I've been a fairly frequent user of DXM for the past year.

When it all started I was a senior in high school, home from school with a sinus infection for the 3rd day straight, and bored as hell. I had remembered hearing a girl from school talk about how if you drink a whole bottle of Nyquil you'd trip all day. I figured I might as well try it. I drank down a bottle of nyquil, and fighting down the urge to vomit, sat down at my computer and got online. Fast forward an hour, I'm thinking "This is bullshit", I'm tired, and I just go to bed. I wake up an hour later, and yeah... It wasn't "BS."

From then on, I was hooked. My plans for just about every weekend were to grab a bottle of Robitussin "long-Lasting cough" and trip. Not every weekend obviously, but if I was able to, I did it. This goes on for a few months, and then it's winter vacation. The first week of winter vacation I drank a bottle Saturday, Tuesday, and Friday. The next week starting Monday, I drank one every day. The last time I tripped that week on Friday, I reached the 4th plateau. I was completely immobile lying in bed in a pitch black room listening to Acid King's "III" album. In my hallucination, I saw a spirit trying to contact me. I say trying, because I couldn't understand it, almost as if it was speaking a language I couldn't understand. It got angry at me for not understanding, and flew down from the ceiling at me. I was terrified, but unable to move.

Just a little side note, I did a lot of research on DXM, read the DXM FAQ, etc. I wasn't just some dumbass kid going into this blind.

The days following were not pleasant, to say the least. Incredibly irritable, I'd see things in my peripherals that weren't actually there, pupils would randomly dilate, staring at anything for longer than 9-10 seconds would cause it to radically distort, and darkness was an immediate distortion.

I discontinued use for a month after that trip.

After that month I used it sporadically, but not nearly as frequently or in such large volume as the last trip of winter vacation.

Fast forward to November last year. I'm depressed and seeing a psychologist. I hadn't used DXM since August, and aside from occasional marijuana/alcohol usage had been somewhat clean. In December I started abusing hydrocodone, and stopped january 2nd. On December 28th I was prescribed Wellbutrin. On the 4th of january, a friend and I tripped again that day, and then a second time that night. It was the highest dose I've been on since the last trip of winter, but still not even half of what the winter trip was.

It's now 4 days after, and I just don't feel right. I feel like I want to cry, like I want to break down, but I can't. When I'm around people I feel like I'm acting, nothing feels natural, like I'm just watching myself live, not actually living in me. My eyes are still kinda dilated, darkness yields OEV's, and everything is just... wrong. I will attribute the inability to cry to wellbutrin not meshing well with my body, but everything else just scares me.

I really don't know what to do. I don't want the visuals, I don't want the high, I want a return to normal. I've been beating this around in my head all day. I think with time it'll eventually clear out.

Either way I'm not touching this shit again.

 

[lazydullard]

It'll go away eventually. Just keep waiting.

I've had really bad trips when I've done DXM with well butrin. But I've always gone back to normal after a few days.

Just eat, sleep, relax. You should go back to normal. If it keeps up, tell your psychologist or a family member or something.

But I'm curous. Why did the spirit terrify you? I love it when things like that happen to me on DXM. It's the whole point of taking a 3rd or 4th plateau trip.

 

[MasterDestroyer]

I really hope it does.

And I've noticed wellbutrin tends to make those effects more noticeable, although that could very well easily just be me worrying about it too much.

I think it terrified me because I wasn't ready for it, and it felt so real. I was thinking I'd take some, lay down in bed, get some interesting visuals, listen to music, and maybe try playing my bass guitar like usual.

 

[Jackeh]

This will definitely go away, I've experienced the depersonalisation aspeect from a synthetic cannabinoid blend. It flashed on and off every so often, but after a week or so it became less frequent.

 

[pasha]

^Man those are the worst. When you smoke too much of a potent synthetic, the derealization and border line psychosis are frightening. You feel like your in fight or flight mode with an almost falling down the rabbit hole aspect.

 

[Jackeh]

After about a month, the frequency was about once ever week and a half. When it happened (supposedly random, I can't think of anything that triggered it), I would feel detached from my body, then I'd start panicking and when I looked down it felt like I shouldn't be able to see my feet, as if I was in some form of game where your own body shouldn't be visible.

 

[pasha]

^I couldn't have described it better myself. It's an absolute nightmare. I've never experienced this from DXM though because I never fooled around with it much, if its similar to what you've described from synthetics, then my sympathys to the OP. After all, I too wanted to crawl up and die.

 

[Mcrulez4life]

Honestly I have been doing DXM for a year and I have never heard of plateaus until now wtf are they?

 

[bronson]

Put simply just the various stages of the trip.

A document entitled "The DXM FAQ," by William E. White, classified dextromethorphan's high-dose effects into four or five plateaus, each defined by a dosing range. The dosages are specified in ratios of milligrams (of the drug) per kilogram (of one's body mass). Doses are experimentally, not scientifically derived. According to the FAQ, the plateaus occur as follows:[13]

• First plateau: At a dosage of 1.5 to 2.5 mg/kg, effects include alertness, restlessness, increased heartbeat, increased body temperature, intensification of emotions, euphoria, loss of balance, and slight intoxication.
  
• Second plateau: At 2.5 to 7.5 mg/kg, effects are similar to the first plateau, but with heavier intoxication, choppy sensory input, a dreamlike state of consciousness, some detachment from outside world, and closed-eye hallucinations.
  
• Third plateau: At 7.5 to 15.0 mg/kg, effects include flanging of visual effects, difficulty recognizing people or objects, chaotic blindness, dreamlike vision, inability to comprehend language, abstract hallucinations, delayed reaction time, decision making impairment, feelings of peace and quiet, near complete loss of motor coordination, short-term memory impairment, and/or feelings of rebirth.
  
• Fourth plateau: At 15.0 mg/kg or more, an individual may experience a perceived loss of contact and control with their own body, changes in visual perception, out-of-body experiences, perceptions of contact with "superior" beings, other miscellaneous delusions, lack of movement or desire to move, rapid heart rate, complete blindness, increased hearing, and intensification of third plateau effects.
  
• Plateau Sigma: 2.5-7.5 mg/kg every three hours for 9–12 hours; occurs by prolonging dosage. Plateau sigma is marked by the presence of psychosis with visual and auditory hallucinations. Users have reported that inclinations manifest as auditory hallucinations; rather than simply feeling tired and sitting down, a user might hear a voice saying, "sit down now, you're tired," and feel inclined to obey. White says that of all the reports of Plateau Sigma experiences he received, over half were described as unpleasant. (Source)