first off, I might have drank a little bit? w/e it's legal so sue me IMO
- my brother is a fucking nigger.
and no, I don't think that is a racist comment because it's not even about skin color, it's a lifestyle. He never brings shit to the table, yet always expects a seat at it. Yeah, that is ok when you are fucking 10 years old but seriously grow the fuck up dude. Buy your own fucking weed. Buy your own fucking alcohol. or just die, seriously you'd solve like a dozen different problems if you just died. All of your friends would rather hang out with me than you but I don't even want to hang out with them. You don't even chill with anyone besides some 18 year old black kids and your hood girlfriend with 3 kids and youre halfway to 27 at this point in time. You have no discernible skills, yet you never seem to shut the fuck up. Newsflash bro, people only appreciate nonstop chatter if you actually know what the fuck you are talking about. you can't even download pirated movies on my computer without fucking up and wasting my blank DVDs. seriously, fucking die, and I don't feel bad for saying that because it's what everyone else is thinking anyway
- customers who are overly enthusiastic towards me at work and surprised when I don't react the same way
yeah, sweet dude, youre getting FUCKED UP tonight on that bottle of Jager. I don't give a fuck. You get to walk into one of 10,000 places to buy liquor for about 14 hours a day, 7 days a week, and you act like I'm supposed to give a fuck. I have to plan my whole day around just getting heroin, have to be in the exact right spot at the exact right time with the exact right amount of money. You can't even remember to bring your fucking wallet into a liquor store and want to bitch at me for closing at 5pm on Sundays. Maybe if you planned ahead a bit I wouldn't have to slam the door on your face. Yeah, I'm sure youre in a great mood as you buy 15 different bottles of $40 wine and put it all on your credit card then ask me to help you carry it out to your car. I'm sorry, are you recovering from two broken hands? or are you just a douchebag who views the retail industry as your slaves? Some guy got all offended the other day because I said:
me- "how are ya?"
douche- "do you really care?"
me- "that's what I say to everyone actually"
douche- "so you don't care?"
me- "I'm not saying that, that's just what I say to everyone"
douche- "ok well just don't say anything then"
me- "debit or credit?"
douche- "credit"
me- "ok youre gonna have to sign on the bottom of the pad there"
douche-"yeah I know, I'm a big boy, I've done this before"
and at this point I just shut it down completely, say nothing, and stare at him until he leaves the store.
I'm sorry, did you want me to jump across the counter and knock you the fuck out in front of you unattractive wife? If I wasn't so sure that was the real cause of your doucheness, I would gladly fight a man in his mid 40's with nothing better to do than talk shit unprovoked to some kid who does nothing but bag your shit up like a fucking NASCAR pit change
people who are heavier than you think it's all fun and games until they are fucking unconscious, and if I didn't need this job for the next 4 months, I don't know if I would have made it this far
you know what, fuck wine drinkers in general. drink straight liquor like a man or get the fuck out of my face you FUCKING. PUSSY. No, I don't care about which year was better than which, and in 15 years I'm going to be telling people which marijuana strains to smoke instead of what Pinot Grigio tastes like. and all the people who gave a fuck about wine in the first place are going to come in to the weed store and now I'M THE EXPERT. Oh I'm sorry, turns out I really don't give a fuck if you enjoy this or not, give me your money and shut the fuck up.
people think retail is about customer service, which is partly true. but when your retail establishment has no competitors it is about one thing, the money being right. now shut the fuck up and swipe you credit card before I deem you too drunk to make this transaction and require no proof other than me wanting to make your life as miserable as possible
- Philadelphia accents
my god, can you even speak English? yous guys are so craazy! shut the fuck up and take a fucking speech class. christ. no wonder the rest of the country thinks we're a bunch of neanderthals. I don't say "wooder", I don't say "wiz wit", and I don't say "the Iggles" because that's not how the words are fucking pronounced ffs. read a fucking book
-society's image of the Nazis
seriously, they get no credit for shit when in reality they were one of the most ahead of their time civilizations in history. Yeah, I get it, the Holocaust was bad. Too bad "holocausts" have been happening since the dawn of time. Ask any Native American how they feel about the Jewish Holocaust. they'd be like.....what? Ask any Armenian how they feel about the Jewish Holocaust. Ask any Kurd how they feel about the Jewish Holocaust. get the fuck over it, the only reason it is even as big of a deal as other genocides is because enough rich Jewish people bitched enough to make a museum out of it. and all Israel does is step on Arab nation's toes all the fucking time knowing full well that they'll get away with it. I'm not a Palestinian sympathizer, but damn did they get shit on by society. "hey we know you've been living here for the longest time but now you need to get the fuck out because we feel bad for these whiners and don't want them in our countries anymore so we made a nation for them in the smack middle of a bunch of pissed off Arabs who were forcibly made to accept it as what was going to happen with no say in the matter, all because some bullshit scripture said they might have posted up there for a bit way before anyone can fucking remember"
but yeah, Palestinians, WHY YOU GOTTA BE SO RUDE?
oh yeah, because the very existence of Israel is bullshit to begin with and it's not hard to see how the rich take care of the rich. now fucking cry about it as we bulldoze your shitty mud house with our American supplied tanks. now let's all act so fucking outraged and surprised when Arabs go and fly a plane into the physical representation of American arrogance (9/11 if that went over your head and into the 78th floor) and it only cost you like 20 thousand dollars for some flying lessons and a small apartment for a few months. You brought this "War On Terror" on yourselves Muslims, now cower in fear as we launch UAV drones worth billions of dollars to blow up a shack worth 15 cents somewhere in Northwest Pakistan and kill 29 children but miss the intended "terrorist" anyway because he's actually in a cave somewhere or better yet, down the street from a fucking Pakistani Intelligence HQ. Yeah, that'll fucking show em who's boss
news flash fuckheads, George Washington was a "terrorist" in his day. and he's only on every fucking $1 bill and quarter in existence.
god damn I don't even know what I'm typing here but it makes me fucking sick that you can't call certain groups out on shit because of some fabricated rules created by people who probably can't even spell "Palestinian"
"oh you don't got oil we can take advantage of or stocks we can invest in? well you know what, why don't you and your wannabe country go fuck yourselves as we bend over backwards to lick the Saudi's assholes as they pretend to be our friends for as long as the money is there for the taking"
and I'm supposed to give a shit whether the Republicans or Democrats control the Senate? Just FYI, both of them have controlled it at certain points over the past decade and gas is still over $3.50 a gallon in most places. You know, that thing that affects every single individual in our society whether it's directly or indirectly. You know, that thing that Halaburton and other assorted fucks made HUNDREDS OF BILLIONS off of as I decided whether I wanted to invest my money or be able to drive a car to work. You know, that thing that is a byproduct of the same shit that literally shoots from the fucking ground in Iraq. That country we supposedly "liberated", only to have it fall to fucking pieces as soon as we left.
I really don't get it, like does anyone else want to just burn Washington DC to the ground? What do they fucking do besides waste everyone's time and money? And I know this is just drunk ramblings, but seriously, they need to be forcibly removed from power because if not things will never change
it's just hard finding enough people who are willing to grab that first brick
- my brother is a fucking nigger.
and no, I don't think that is a racist comment because it's not even about skin color, it's a lifestyle. He never brings shit to the table, yet always expects a seat at it. Yeah, that is ok when you are fucking 10 years old but seriously grow the fuck up dude. Buy your own fucking weed. Buy your own fucking alcohol. or just die, seriously you'd solve like a dozen different problems if you just died. All of your friends would rather hang out with me than you but I don't even want to hang out with them. You don't even chill with anyone besides some 18 year old black kids and your hood girlfriend with 3 kids and youre halfway to 27 at this point in time. You have no discernible skills, yet you never seem to shut the fuck up. Newsflash bro, people only appreciate nonstop chatter if you actually know what the fuck you are talking about. you can't even download pirated movies on my computer without fucking up and wasting my blank DVDs. seriously, fucking die, and I don't feel bad for saying that because it's what everyone else is thinking anyway
- customers who are overly enthusiastic towards me at work and surprised when I don't react the same way
yeah, sweet dude, youre getting FUCKED UP tonight on that bottle of Jager. I don't give a fuck. You get to walk into one of 10,000 places to buy liquor for about 14 hours a day, 7 days a week, and you act like I'm supposed to give a fuck. I have to plan my whole day around just getting heroin, have to be in the exact right spot at the exact right time with the exact right amount of money. You can't even remember to bring your fucking wallet into a liquor store and want to bitch at me for closing at 5pm on Sundays. Maybe if you planned ahead a bit I wouldn't have to slam the door on your face. Yeah, I'm sure youre in a great mood as you buy 15 different bottles of $40 wine and put it all on your credit card then ask me to help you carry it out to your car. I'm sorry, are you recovering from two broken hands? or are you just a douchebag who views the retail industry as your slaves? Some guy got all offended the other day because I said:
me- "how are ya?"
douche- "do you really care?"
me- "that's what I say to everyone actually"
douche- "so you don't care?"
me- "I'm not saying that, that's just what I say to everyone"
douche- "ok well just don't say anything then"
me- "debit or credit?"
douche- "credit"
me- "ok youre gonna have to sign on the bottom of the pad there"
douche-"yeah I know, I'm a big boy, I've done this before"
and at this point I just shut it down completely, say nothing, and stare at him until he leaves the store.
I'm sorry, did you want me to jump across the counter and knock you the fuck out in front of you unattractive wife? If I wasn't so sure that was the real cause of your doucheness, I would gladly fight a man in his mid 40's with nothing better to do than talk shit unprovoked to some kid who does nothing but bag your shit up like a fucking NASCAR pit change
people who are heavier than you think it's all fun and games until they are fucking unconscious, and if I didn't need this job for the next 4 months, I don't know if I would have made it this far
you know what, fuck wine drinkers in general. drink straight liquor like a man or get the fuck out of my face you FUCKING. PUSSY. No, I don't care about which year was better than which, and in 15 years I'm going to be telling people which marijuana strains to smoke instead of what Pinot Grigio tastes like. and all the people who gave a fuck about wine in the first place are going to come in to the weed store and now I'M THE EXPERT. Oh I'm sorry, turns out I really don't give a fuck if you enjoy this or not, give me your money and shut the fuck up.
people think retail is about customer service, which is partly true. but when your retail establishment has no competitors it is about one thing, the money being right. now shut the fuck up and swipe you credit card before I deem you too drunk to make this transaction and require no proof other than me wanting to make your life as miserable as possible
- Philadelphia accents
my god, can you even speak English? yous guys are so craazy! shut the fuck up and take a fucking speech class. christ. no wonder the rest of the country thinks we're a bunch of neanderthals. I don't say "wooder", I don't say "wiz wit", and I don't say "the Iggles" because that's not how the words are fucking pronounced ffs. read a fucking book
-society's image of the Nazis
seriously, they get no credit for shit when in reality they were one of the most ahead of their time civilizations in history. Yeah, I get it, the Holocaust was bad. Too bad "holocausts" have been happening since the dawn of time. Ask any Native American how they feel about the Jewish Holocaust. they'd be like.....what? Ask any Armenian how they feel about the Jewish Holocaust. Ask any Kurd how they feel about the Jewish Holocaust. get the fuck over it, the only reason it is even as big of a deal as other genocides is because enough rich Jewish people bitched enough to make a museum out of it. and all Israel does is step on Arab nation's toes all the fucking time knowing full well that they'll get away with it. I'm not a Palestinian sympathizer, but damn did they get shit on by society. "hey we know you've been living here for the longest time but now you need to get the fuck out because we feel bad for these whiners and don't want them in our countries anymore so we made a nation for them in the smack middle of a bunch of pissed off Arabs who were forcibly made to accept it as what was going to happen with no say in the matter, all because some bullshit scripture said they might have posted up there for a bit way before anyone can fucking remember"
but yeah, Palestinians, WHY YOU GOTTA BE SO RUDE?
oh yeah, because the very existence of Israel is bullshit to begin with and it's not hard to see how the rich take care of the rich. now fucking cry about it as we bulldoze your shitty mud house with our American supplied tanks. now let's all act so fucking outraged and surprised when Arabs go and fly a plane into the physical representation of American arrogance (9/11 if that went over your head and into the 78th floor) and it only cost you like 20 thousand dollars for some flying lessons and a small apartment for a few months. You brought this "War On Terror" on yourselves Muslims, now cower in fear as we launch UAV drones worth billions of dollars to blow up a shack worth 15 cents somewhere in Northwest Pakistan and kill 29 children but miss the intended "terrorist" anyway because he's actually in a cave somewhere or better yet, down the street from a fucking Pakistani Intelligence HQ. Yeah, that'll fucking show em who's boss
news flash fuckheads, George Washington was a "terrorist" in his day. and he's only on every fucking $1 bill and quarter in existence.
god damn I don't even know what I'm typing here but it makes me fucking sick that you can't call certain groups out on shit because of some fabricated rules created by people who probably can't even spell "Palestinian"
"oh you don't got oil we can take advantage of or stocks we can invest in? well you know what, why don't you and your wannabe country go fuck yourselves as we bend over backwards to lick the Saudi's assholes as they pretend to be our friends for as long as the money is there for the taking"
and I'm supposed to give a shit whether the Republicans or Democrats control the Senate? Just FYI, both of them have controlled it at certain points over the past decade and gas is still over $3.50 a gallon in most places. You know, that thing that affects every single individual in our society whether it's directly or indirectly. You know, that thing that Halaburton and other assorted fucks made HUNDREDS OF BILLIONS off of as I decided whether I wanted to invest my money or be able to drive a car to work. You know, that thing that is a byproduct of the same shit that literally shoots from the fucking ground in Iraq. That country we supposedly "liberated", only to have it fall to fucking pieces as soon as we left.
I really don't get it, like does anyone else want to just burn Washington DC to the ground? What do they fucking do besides waste everyone's time and money? And I know this is just drunk ramblings, but seriously, they need to be forcibly removed from power because if not things will never change
it's just hard finding enough people who are willing to grab that first brick