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Does life slow down this much in your mid 20's?????

C

chrisalt

Bluelighter
Joined
Jan 28, 2012
Messages
369
I just turned 25 years old at the end of Oct/12 and i got a question for anyone around my age or older.

Does life just kinda of change out of the blue or without warning?? When i was 16-21 i was running around every night. At the bar, at a friends, a party etc. Then came 22 things slowed down abit and i had knee surgery so i was out of the game for a year. I come back to life at 23 and things are even slower. Less parties, less friends(except for the life long ones) and the occaional bar night maybe once a month.

Now fast forward to 25. Life is so fucking boring. No parties, no friends (I have like 5 friends thats ive kept since grade 5) one i see the most because were drug addicts and grab/use together. All i do is work 8-5 mon fri .I RARELY get calls from anyone on thursdays-sundays to hang anymore..Even when things are happening i half the time get left out of the 5 people getting together because they all have gfs atm and i dont so they do shit together i guess.... and i DO call them from time to time. I dunno what the deal is.. i guess this is how it works as u age... fucking depressing... i feel like crying seriously...when we were 17, The 5 of us were like brothers...picked on, bullied and our lives made hell till we did something about it....now i never see them and im so lonely... it really fucking hurts bad. I guess no one has time anymore... but fuck we could set aside 1 night every 2 weeks to get together and hang...


Did this happen to anyone else??? or am i an odd ball as per the norm.

Did this
 
Life's what you make of it. Bored? Do something. It's up to you to spice up your life. Meet new people, try new things.
 
Its not so much that life slows down, but certainly people are doing different kinds of things as they get older. Its pretty normal to feel nostaligic about that.
 
You are as old as you choose to be.
Don't let the numbers be a factor in the way you judge your life.
I have friends who are 50+, who still party like wild animals all the time.
Those sort of people don't think about their age - it's just a number.
 
Life definitely slows down a little once people go off to College and their separate ways, whether it be work or school. I'm only 21, so I still got a few years left before I hit my mid's but even now I can see it slowing down. We still know how to have fun though :)
 
It runs in cycles, at least for me, I'm in my 30s...I hit a rut in my mid 20s and I thought life was gonna suck from there on out...but then things got even crazier in my late 20s...It's a big world with all kinds of different people...You'll never be a teenager again, but there's plenty of good times ahead, don't despair!
 
^This!

I've learned to enjoy my moments of down time and if it feels like I'm getting bored with my life, I try to spice things up a bit. People do change and sometimes friendships change along with that. Check out some local activities that interest you and volunteer for something that makes you feel good. You'll attract new friends that will be similar to you and want to hang out with you.
 
^i think thats it

I've been in a rut too, I'm barely 26, I thought I'd have done a lot more by now. And I have, but not in the storybook fantasy sort of way. Like "on the road" or some shit.

I did get back into skateboarding a couple months ago, i think i'm better than ever. I also am in a band again, playing bass.. my bandmates are 18 haha. I think in a lot of ways life is starting to get a lot more "down to earth" - and yes boring - as I age.

But somehow i'm satisfied with less. I let go a lot more.
 
Man, I know exactly what you're saying.

There's something weird about life right after college. The best way I could describe it would be to say that life loses its sense of narrative. When you were a teenager, it was like life was a story or some kind of epic journey, like you were really building toward something each and every day. After college, it's like you're just sort of sitting around, biding your time with meaningless chores.

It's weird. I actually think I'm slightly happier now than I was as a teenager, but I still have really fond memories of adolescence just because those years were so rich with memorable moments. Compared to my life now, my teenage life was like a movie. I knew so many fucking people, and it was like I was along for this big fucking ride with them going through life's "firsts" (first drug experience, first time having sex, first time driving a car, etc). And the fact that we were all going through these milestones together made our relationships stronger. It was so different from anything that came before or after it.

Something related to this occured to me a while ago, actually. I realized that I have more clear memories of my teen years than I have from, say, 2 years ago. It's like my teenage memories are stars on a really clear night sky out in the country, while my early to mid twenties memories are stars on a slightly overcast night in the city. For some reason my teenage memories burn so bright. In comparison, everything since then seems hazy and unclear.

Another thing about this phenomenon: it seems to creep up on you so fucking fast. I can practically pinpoint the moment I knew something had changed, it was right after my fourth year of college, when my friends graduated and I stayed to finish up another few years. Those first few weeks I spent walking around campus and seeing hardly any familiar faces, I just intuitively knew that a really special chapter in my life had finally ended for good, and that there was no going back. It took me a while to figure out what was really going on and why I felt the way I did, but the feeling of stuff being way different basically came overnight.

Another thing: I now totally understand the phrase "youth is wasted on the young."

Oh man, do I ever. The further I get into my twenties the more I can see that youth has this amazing energy about it that most teenagers aren't aware of, and don't really know how to capitalize on. If I could combine my teenage energy with my current worldly wisdom, I'd be unstoppable.

It's weird. My nostalgic feelings about high school are so deep it feels like there should be some big lesson or great cosmic truth contained in them. But there's not. It was just a series of events that left a really deep imprint on my mind and my memory. In some ways those years almost feel like a dream now, or something. My current reality is just so utterly, utterly different.
 
For me, some of that slowdown was good. I mean, when partying was a priority, I really let anything work/career related take a back seat. I am now in my mid thirties and I like things to be less crazy. :D

But I have a ton of friends, my age or older, who are constantly out and partying and having fun. It's just a matter of finding them. The people that you were used to, as you said, have done what a majority of people do around your age: settle down. :) there is nothing that says you have to follow that. The world is a big place and these are a million opportunities out there and if there is one lesson I learned is that life is truly what you make it. You gotta go out and find the opportunities and not give up at a few failed tries. There are people that work at your speed. There are parties and girls to be had. And if you are unsatisfied with your career or something, you can even play around with that. Same old job getting boring? Mix it up! It's Up to you. You create your reality. You may need or want co-conspirators and it might take a while to find them, but, when you find one, they wll usually open up a whole new series of people to you. It has happened a few times in my life, already. Whatever I'm into, it seems just ends up filling my life with such people. Even when it's bad for me :(

Good luck!

Just remember it's you!
 
What a thread, I am 25 and about to sit my last exam of my undergraduate degree at university. I have messed around a lot since finishing highschool, it almost feels like I have wasted 7 years, however looking back, how can I have any regrets. I spent three years in a degree I wasn't wholly interested in (elec eng) then transferred to something which suited me a little better (a BSc- maths). What is 'wasting' time anyway? I have a lot of fond memories of the times when I would go out and drink litres upon litres of bundy and coke, dance like a lunatic until 4am and have my body not be phased when I woke up by the amount of crap I had ingested last night. Now it's like I have a switch in my body which trips after a certain point of alcohol consumption and I end up violently ill, usually for the whole next day. The solution? Have a bong then drink less, I get the same great club experience of dancing energetically for hours to electronic music, love it. Perhaps we can experience the same things as we did when we in our teens with a different interface to the experience. How philosophical xD
I am still living at home which I often spend thought cycles being negative about, however all of us mid 20's people must remember that we are still very young. Being negative about wasted time or bad things that have happened is not conducive to enjoying life, why waste a few years in your mid 20's reflecting on the bad things that happened in your teens. I for one will not be negative **** about it all. I had a great time, sure I'm not working for some fortune 500 company sucking the corporate cock, but why would I want to be working for such vultures?
I think the mid 20's is a great time, in fact I feel relieved to be in my mid 20's. I have a steady relationship with a girl instead of my usual rooting and scooting that happened in my earlier years, and it's helping me realise the positiveness that comes with being consistent in life. Consistency is definitely something that I lacked in my teens/ earlier 20's. Part of me still feels like a little boy but this little boy has access to a much more steady mindset than he did 7 years ago. I never want the little boy in me to be extinguished, instead I want him to enjoy the world even more as the years pass by using the experience he has gained.
The thing I am least looking forward to is getting a job in the world. I think the premise of a job is something entirely negative. I still can't comprehend how people can slave away in some bullshit workplace for years and years, paying off a mortgage and bills etc. I am far too much of a little boy to comprehend this or undertake any of it. I want to go back to the service station in which I used to work, save and travel so I can meet as many people as I can. Life is boring without good people to enjoy it with, never forget this. I miss the days of highschool, being in the comfort zone of your circle of friends. It was so relaxing. Anyway I had better go and study for tmrw. It was good to share this though, cheers
 
I'm only 23 and life has slowed down significantly but I think this is partly out of choice on my behalf; I think if you really wanted it to continue as crazy as it was you could but you would be giving up certain responsibilities that you as an adult now... can foresee the consequences of if you do..
 
if your life is unfulfilling, maybe youre just waiting for something to happen. or taking what seems to be the most obvious path (you know, like what others think you should do) instead of going your own way. if you have boring thoughts and boring intentions, your life will be boring and probably depressing.
 
My life has gone through ebbs and flows all throughout my 20's. There have been periods of intense activity, outward growth and expansion, and then there have been periods where not a lot is outwardly happening but it feels like inwardly there is some downtime happening. I think both kinds of being in the world are necessary. The boring times give you time for intense self-reflection.
 
im 25. My life is utterly non existent right now. I have no friends,no job, no school. All my HS friends moved. I moved. But its due to my drug use and my excessive partying. Thinking that i can be 21 forever. But now its time to grow up and now im starting over.
 
I am 27 years old and I have felt like you in the past. I don't know your situation, but you might look to your drug use as a reason for the lack of friends/invites. We are often wrong about how fucked up we look to other people. Last year I quit using and my social life improved dramatically, and not just 'cause I wasn't spending all my time scoring and using. I was able to ignore the shady people I previously hung out with, too. I am back to using again around these shady people and I can see it impact my social life. I also want to say what is fun/acceptable at 20 can be viewed as pathetic even at 25. If you say, 'everyone was partying like me,' how recently was that? How casually were they doing X drugs and how does that relate to your current use? Even just a pot addiction can be looked down on as you age. I went through this over the summer with alcohol. It seemed like everyone was getting as wasted as I was every night, but my roommate had to point out to me that it wasn't the case. Just my drunken perception.

Leo Rosten, a political scientist once said, 'If an explaination relies on a single cause, it is surely wrong.' ... so just consider this as a possibility. Good luck with everything. I've kind of abandoned a number of my friends, started using dope again and I'm in a very similar situation as you.
 
23 here, and yeah, things seemed to have slowed down. I think it's been mainly down to not really caring all that much about attending parties etc. I went to the gym with my mate the other day, and we both agreed that big nights out aren't as important as they used to be. I'm sure it won't continue to be this uneventful, it's just how it is at the moment.

Partying is pretty awesome at times. But I think we choose to remember the best bits. I've been to a lot of shit parties over the years, had a lot of awful comedowns/hangovers. Can't say I miss that too much. Especially clubs. Don't miss them at all. Most overrated load of nonsense.
 
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