Do You Want Your Auld Lobby Washed Down?

[Sammy G]

£ cheap £

 

[Shambles]

And the award for euphemism of the week goes to...

 

[Sammy G]

Dirty bastard.

It's a sideline. A nice little earner so I can get a posh bottle for New Year.

Just how grimy is your auld lobby, sir?

 

[Shambles]

It could certainly do with a wipe down - probably nearer a hose down. How much would you want for taking your hose to my auld lobby?

 

[Sammy G]

Negotiable upon inspection.

 

[Shambles]

I've got to nip out for a bit so will leave it on the latch for you to have a wee poke about in at your leisure.

 

[Sammy G]

Just the way I like it. Take yer time

 

[Don Luigi]

My auld lobby is as clean as any neighbour's, but it still needs washed down. This is why it is clean.

How much to clean a spotless lobby?

 

[Sammy G]

A nominal fee, perhaps. It's a rare pleasure to wash down a spotless lobby.

 

[Don Luigi]

I've never provided a monetary fee to have it washed before and I'm not about to start. I also need to know that you won't rush it.

Are you open to bartering?

 

[Sammy G]

I'd never rush it. I may be rakish, but I put in a shift, y'know?

Barter? Aye. Depends what's on the table though. Drugs?

 

[Don Luigi]

I don't take them anymore (which is probably why I haven't shown my face here in a good while) but would be willing to acquire anything which increases salivation.

All I can offer is some good cleaning products and perhaps a few snake skins..

Fuck, what has happened to me? No wonder I'm having a dry spell

 

[pinkpapaver]

maybe not tonight, but I'l be up for a bit of crack, the whiskey and the beer.

 

[smackydowners]

I don't take them anymore (which is probably why I haven't shown my face here in a good while) but would be willing to acquire anything which increases salivation.

All I can offer is some good cleaning products and perhaps a few snake skins..

Fuck, what has happened to me? No wonder I'm having a dry spell

mate thats weell commendable. wish i coukd put them.down (not my neck) fpr long periods of time

ALSO: what the fuck are you all on about.? im assuming lobby is an euphemish for your "doWnstairs landing" or whatever n
if thats the case, im in, but itll cost ya but ill make that bitch gleam! i need the cash. or the brown. either otf....

 

[One Thousand Words]

Every time I read the thread title it reminds me of this...

NSFW:

I really would't want my tween daughter singing for gobby

 

[smackydowners]

^agreed.

along with the dubious title, werent. they dancing.to jiggy wit it?

 

[Sammy G]

maybe not tonight, but I'l be up for a bit of crack, the whiskey and the beer.

Another classic, and no mistake.

Anyways, I raised a gram of heroin from my lobby-scrubbing, so today is saved after all.