I have a story that I need a bit of advice on, and I would appreciate it if you could read and give me your thoughts! If you don't mind but first, I want to add a lil background: I had a liver transplant Jan 2011 and I have been recovering since. the past two years, I've been having on and off problems, chronic abdominal pain partly due to my ulcerative colitis, and the other part due to my enlarged spleen (probably the size of a football). I have been on one narcotic or the other since before 2008, maybe even since 2006, I don't quite remember when I started-not important though. I am two years almost to the day since my transplant, and am just about to go back to work, (yippee)! I've had numerous infections and a partial rejection scare that has set me back a bit, but going to work everyday will be a great step towards regaining my strength back!
Anyway, most of you will understand just how important your pain medicine is to you if you've ever suffered from any type of chronic pain. So for those of you who don't know, in some cases, people like me, its nearly impossible. You get to a certain point where your completely reliant-I don't even know if I'll ever be able to go off them since my spleen did not shrink-like it was supposed to-after my transplant. When I get up in the morning, I have excruciating pain all over my stomach. For UC patients, we feel nothing, we're perfectly fine, then a split second later, we have that "gotta go gotta go gotta go right now" kinda feeling and its drop everything and run.. and then there's the constant chronic pain right where it always is. Maybe you feel like going the bathroom will help it, but it doesn't...then you try and lay flat for a few minutes...nope still nothing...or maybe you sit cross legged leaning your head and torso over your legs...and gain, strike three. The only thing you can do to relieve the pain, is by taking your prescribed pain medicine.
So, with that being said, (sorry for the long into, I tend to digress) I will get to my story:
I have this friend, I've only known him since summer of 2011, when I moves back home after my surgery..met, chatted and became instant friends. We have a great friendship, hang out everyday, I know his family he knows mine, he comes and helps me, comes to my Drs. appt. with me, sometimes plays my chauffeur for an early morning appt. when I'm too tired to drive. We became about as close as people can get (without a physical relationship) in a small period of time. We talked all the time, I knew shit about him and he knew shit bout me that I've never told anyone. The trust was huge.
I've even let him borrow my car for the night so he didn't have to walk home in the cold. (And I have a VERY NICE sportier type vehicle, not the type you lend to just anyone).
So, anyway, this past Saturday, he came with me to another one of my friend's house while he did some work on my car, rakes, rotors, oil, etc. he offered to vacuum out my car for me so I said "fine just drop me off at my house and then just bring my car whenever we hang out tomorrow no big deal I'm not going anywhere, its football Sunday"! Then, I woke up Sunday morning, with a little flu-like thing going on, a high fever and chills so I stayed in bed all day, apparently so did he. know there hasn't been anyone, not even my dad, in my house the past two or three days.
Today, Monday, he came over, we watched TV, lil, for some reason he went into my room, which he has done multiple times before, and I never really thought anything of it, he went to get my heating pad. Get my dog, whatever. He left and too my car again because it was cold and we planned on hanging out tomorrow so why not, a
Saves me the trip to drop him off..
I came to bed and started getting ready for bed. For some reason, I decided to count my pills again, think I was planning ahead for the week to mark when I had to go to the Docs to get a new script, and I saw that I was out of pills on the 14th.. And I said, that's IMPOSSIBLE.. I ONLY take two of these a day, and if they were filled on 12/19th, with a 31-day December, I'd need to fill them again on 1/18.. Also, I distinctly remember I had checked my pills last week, because you know when your given a pain med supply and your only allowed two OC a day, you KNOW when to take it and how many you do, or should, have. I had gone to the ER for a nights onetime this month (this same friend took me there, and stayed with me from about 10pm till I finally got discharged around 6am, too) so I counted my pills last week sometime because I wanted to make sure I didn't miss a dose due to my ER stay, which would give me an extra pill and would be great-ya know. So because of that, I knew I had exactly enough until "this specific date" and that's the date I had to drive to my Drs. office and get a new script. (You guys know this, you all know how it works..need the paper in hand, so we all know when we need to refill our monthly's, right?).
I double counted, I marked out on the calendar the days and when I took them on what days so I know how many are missing.. 5...
So basically, my so called "great, awesome, amazing friend" stole my pills. I should mention, he has done this before. He took two pills from me about a year ago, this was a time he was going through a rough time, and I kinda just let it drop, I did confront him and he denied it, but I got confirmation from someone else that he showed up after e left my place at another friends house with my pills. So I knew. I'm not dumb.. Us chronic pain people know how many pills we have.. So. Fast forward to tonight, I KNOW it was him. So I called him and confronted
him and of course he couldn't even deny it because he KNEW he was caught dead to rights...and now he feels like a dick. Which he should.
So basically I don't even know what to do. It's not even the fact that he told the pills.. It's the fact that he KNOWS I NEED those pills. He knows how much pain I'm in without them. He knows I've been sick he sat in the ER with me! I mean COMON. I guess I have a new fondness for "Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me.." But we cleared the air on the first time, and I genuinely thought he was doing real well and I also know that he's been gaining the courage to ask me out,I know it, he told me his gramps keeps getting on him to ask me out because he doesn't think guys and girls can be friends, but I know that was his way of trying to gauge my reaction to the idea..so, I called him, I gave him everything: tears, guilt, sympathy, rage, and threats.. He said he would "make it right by morning" which I don't even know what that means, because I know he took them already, I asked him and he couldn't even deny it. I mean these are 30 ML of OCs, how the eF is he gonna replace those, what give me 5 of his grandpa's perks? COMON.. Really? What's even more disappointing, is I even asked him for a couple perks yesterday for my migraine, the OC doesn't work well for it-and he gave me some-then I proceeded to tell him how I'm gonna be low this month on my Dillies bc I have been having worse pain than normal. And he just sat there probably thinking about how he stole some from me..
So right now, I told him if I don't hear from him by 1pm tomorrow I will call the cops on him. I did let him keep my car, but partly because I didn't want to see him tonight, I also didn't want him to wake his grandpa to follow him to my house to drop the car off.
He will call me tomorrow, I know he will, he's not gonna take off its my car, he knows better, and he's not that kind of skeevy kid.
So sorry, I'll cut it down. Anyway, I don't know what to do now? How can I ever trust him again? I mean he has done this twice now. We were such good friends.. We really were. I'd hate to not be friends anymore. But I just don't know how this can be repaired. If I don't get my pills ask, I WILL have to go to the ER for pain control, and I told him that, which fucked me so bad because I'm supposed to start my job on the 14th.. If I don't have pills for the 14-18.. I'm FUCKED
I have been trying to get back to work. Since September, and I'm finally starting and I'm gonna be going through Withdrawal from 5 years of OC use when I go back? How much more could you screw your friend than that.. Well I'm sure there's ways, but that's like an uber burn. I don't even know what IM gonna do if he doesn't make good. If he doesn't, I WILL have to file a police report because, what an I do? I can't be asking my Dr for a refill a week early! I can't pay $150 for 5 OC pills on the street even if I DID have any idea where to get them! Ugh..
This is some deep dilemma shit.
Anyone have any thoughts? I greatly appreciate them
Anyway, most of you will understand just how important your pain medicine is to you if you've ever suffered from any type of chronic pain. So for those of you who don't know, in some cases, people like me, its nearly impossible. You get to a certain point where your completely reliant-I don't even know if I'll ever be able to go off them since my spleen did not shrink-like it was supposed to-after my transplant. When I get up in the morning, I have excruciating pain all over my stomach. For UC patients, we feel nothing, we're perfectly fine, then a split second later, we have that "gotta go gotta go gotta go right now" kinda feeling and its drop everything and run.. and then there's the constant chronic pain right where it always is. Maybe you feel like going the bathroom will help it, but it doesn't...then you try and lay flat for a few minutes...nope still nothing...or maybe you sit cross legged leaning your head and torso over your legs...and gain, strike three. The only thing you can do to relieve the pain, is by taking your prescribed pain medicine.
So, with that being said, (sorry for the long into, I tend to digress) I will get to my story:
I have this friend, I've only known him since summer of 2011, when I moves back home after my surgery..met, chatted and became instant friends. We have a great friendship, hang out everyday, I know his family he knows mine, he comes and helps me, comes to my Drs. appt. with me, sometimes plays my chauffeur for an early morning appt. when I'm too tired to drive. We became about as close as people can get (without a physical relationship) in a small period of time. We talked all the time, I knew shit about him and he knew shit bout me that I've never told anyone. The trust was huge.
I've even let him borrow my car for the night so he didn't have to walk home in the cold. (And I have a VERY NICE sportier type vehicle, not the type you lend to just anyone).
So, anyway, this past Saturday, he came with me to another one of my friend's house while he did some work on my car, rakes, rotors, oil, etc. he offered to vacuum out my car for me so I said "fine just drop me off at my house and then just bring my car whenever we hang out tomorrow no big deal I'm not going anywhere, its football Sunday"! Then, I woke up Sunday morning, with a little flu-like thing going on, a high fever and chills so I stayed in bed all day, apparently so did he. know there hasn't been anyone, not even my dad, in my house the past two or three days.
Today, Monday, he came over, we watched TV, lil, for some reason he went into my room, which he has done multiple times before, and I never really thought anything of it, he went to get my heating pad. Get my dog, whatever. He left and too my car again because it was cold and we planned on hanging out tomorrow so why not, a
Saves me the trip to drop him off..
I came to bed and started getting ready for bed. For some reason, I decided to count my pills again, think I was planning ahead for the week to mark when I had to go to the Docs to get a new script, and I saw that I was out of pills on the 14th.. And I said, that's IMPOSSIBLE.. I ONLY take two of these a day, and if they were filled on 12/19th, with a 31-day December, I'd need to fill them again on 1/18.. Also, I distinctly remember I had checked my pills last week, because you know when your given a pain med supply and your only allowed two OC a day, you KNOW when to take it and how many you do, or should, have. I had gone to the ER for a nights onetime this month (this same friend took me there, and stayed with me from about 10pm till I finally got discharged around 6am, too) so I counted my pills last week sometime because I wanted to make sure I didn't miss a dose due to my ER stay, which would give me an extra pill and would be great-ya know. So because of that, I knew I had exactly enough until "this specific date" and that's the date I had to drive to my Drs. office and get a new script. (You guys know this, you all know how it works..need the paper in hand, so we all know when we need to refill our monthly's, right?).
I double counted, I marked out on the calendar the days and when I took them on what days so I know how many are missing.. 5...
So basically, my so called "great, awesome, amazing friend" stole my pills. I should mention, he has done this before. He took two pills from me about a year ago, this was a time he was going through a rough time, and I kinda just let it drop, I did confront him and he denied it, but I got confirmation from someone else that he showed up after e left my place at another friends house with my pills. So I knew. I'm not dumb.. Us chronic pain people know how many pills we have.. So. Fast forward to tonight, I KNOW it was him. So I called him and confronted
him and of course he couldn't even deny it because he KNEW he was caught dead to rights...and now he feels like a dick. Which he should. So basically I don't even know what to do. It's not even the fact that he told the pills.. It's the fact that he KNOWS I NEED those pills. He knows how much pain I'm in without them. He knows I've been sick he sat in the ER with me! I mean COMON. I guess I have a new fondness for "Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me.." But we cleared the air on the first time, and I genuinely thought he was doing real well and I also know that he's been gaining the courage to ask me out,I know it, he told me his gramps keeps getting on him to ask me out because he doesn't think guys and girls can be friends, but I know that was his way of trying to gauge my reaction to the idea..so, I called him, I gave him everything: tears, guilt, sympathy, rage, and threats.. He said he would "make it right by morning" which I don't even know what that means, because I know he took them already, I asked him and he couldn't even deny it. I mean these are 30 ML of OCs, how the eF is he gonna replace those, what give me 5 of his grandpa's perks? COMON.. Really? What's even more disappointing, is I even asked him for a couple perks yesterday for my migraine, the OC doesn't work well for it-and he gave me some-then I proceeded to tell him how I'm gonna be low this month on my Dillies bc I have been having worse pain than normal. And he just sat there probably thinking about how he stole some from me..
So right now, I told him if I don't hear from him by 1pm tomorrow I will call the cops on him. I did let him keep my car, but partly because I didn't want to see him tonight, I also didn't want him to wake his grandpa to follow him to my house to drop the car off.
He will call me tomorrow, I know he will, he's not gonna take off its my car, he knows better, and he's not that kind of skeevy kid.
So sorry, I'll cut it down. Anyway, I don't know what to do now? How can I ever trust him again? I mean he has done this twice now. We were such good friends.. We really were. I'd hate to not be friends anymore. But I just don't know how this can be repaired. If I don't get my pills ask, I WILL have to go to the ER for pain control, and I told him that, which fucked me so bad because I'm supposed to start my job on the 14th.. If I don't have pills for the 14-18.. I'm FUCKED
I have been trying to get back to work. Since September, and I'm finally starting and I'm gonna be going through Withdrawal from 5 years of OC use when I go back? How much more could you screw your friend than that.. Well I'm sure there's ways, but that's like an uber burn. I don't even know what IM gonna do if he doesn't make good. If he doesn't, I WILL have to file a police report because, what an I do? I can't be asking my Dr for a refill a week early! I can't pay $150 for 5 OC pills on the street even if I DID have any idea where to get them! Ugh..This is some deep dilemma shit.
Anyone have any thoughts? I greatly appreciate them
