Kaleida
Bluelight Crew
- Joined
- Sep 6, 2015
- Messages
- 2,806
Lambda:
Hey SnafuInTheVoid, Theta is feeling kind of switchy right now so I'm going to handle this response.
I'll try to keep my answers to your questions straightforward too.
We've had insomnia for as long as we can recall and it's one of the most core reasons we smoke cannabis every day, though we'd only have to do it every night for that really. It made us miserable when we were younger as we would toss and turn every night and feel exhausted throughout the days (though also stressed for many other reasons at the time), but cannabis actually helps us so much that it's usually not much of an issue these days as long as we have something to smoke, we pretty easily get a full night's sleep as long as we don't have other reasons to have a more disturbed sleep. Now about the experiences, we weren't really paying too close of attention through the majority of these two months, but we do know that we were sleeping slightly less than normal on at least some nights after some of the various tryptamines trips because there was one time smoking MET one day and then MPT the next when we noted we stayed up all night without intending to just because we had such a bubbly energy.... For the most part though I don't think it was anything too wild, like I think the majority of nights throughout this experience we got at least 6+ hours of sleep and I'm not sure we ever got less than 4 hours. Though, after we smoked the 15 mg of 5-MeO-EiPT we definitely got near the minimum of that for the first several days when we were basically still peaking, I can't imagine we slept very well at all even when we did either but I honestly have no idea because it's so hard for any of us to recall now, but I know we got carried away with how intense it was for the first few days, there was some moment where we realized we hadn't been remembering to eat or go to the bathroom or anything really either, but to be fair we were still incredibly blasted at that time and had no idea it was going to last so long. That was a big part of why we finally transferred over to our parents' house for the rest of the experience though to help make sure we actually stayed on top of that stuff.
We might've had a few drinks over that two month period, but I don't particularly remember a night of drinking standing out, and would say it's actually more likely we didn't drink much because we knew we were actively tripping so much, and we hate risking ruining a trip with the lasting effects of alcohol. I'm pretty sure we took kratom a few times, but the same logic as above applies, we specifically avoided it taking it much because we were actively experimenting with taking psychedelic regularly and paying attention to things like tolerance between them too, and even when we do take kratom we almost exclusively take only one capsule that's it, but we do it for IBS-type issues most often and I'd feel pretty confident in saying we felt that need at least here or there in that time period. For the most part though, no, we mainly use psychedelics and cannabis recreationally anymore. We did start drinking and taking kratom more heavily about maybe a week or week and a half after the lasting 15 mg of 5-MeO-EiPT, I forget when exactly now but we were only doing it to try to end to trippiness with the sedative and antipsychotic (kratom) type effects which was successful, the trip would lessen during their effects but return when they wore off.
We tripped more than we've ever tripped in this period excluding a two week period where we smoked varying amounts of DMT either every day or nearly every day for a couple weeks many years ago, mostly mid-range just to see that that could be done, but we still know people who've tripped more often than we did here too, and on heavier dosages of things. The dates are scattered throughout the report and I don't have them all right in front of me anymore but I'm nearly certain we didn't trip more than three times a week at any point during this, and sometimes only two... mostly in a pattern such that there would be something like three to five days between trips, at least once a full week I think, and sometimes we'd trip two days in a row, so that's when there'd be three a week instead of two. Tolerance was very light, but that was the point of the experiment; since DMT and sometimes 5-MeO-DMT are said by many to be able to be smoked frequently without tolerance, we wanted to see if the same was true for the synthetic analogues, and it definitely is to at least a greater extent than we'd experienced with other psychedelics.
We get that too, Theta's been researching like crazy trying to figure out what exactly happened to us, but this isn't really new, we've always researched and wondered these things about ourselves. I know something Theta was going to mention was that one of the weird difficulties of having DID is that hearing voices and having out-of-body experiences and stuff doesn't actually have to mean you're psychotic and if you do deal with psychotic-type issues or even just have anxiety that you do it can make things especially hard to sort out internally, and that's a lot of what she's been going through lately especially because she seems more sensitive to that kind of stuff than we are too. Anyway any time we've had something more like this happen (we've had some powerful psychedelic trips that seemed to trigger things we suspected were almost like nearly manic episodes particularly for Theta before, but they never went nearly this far) there have also been other clear factors as well such as high amounts of social stress or in this case lack of social contact as well as tripping so often probably played a role though she's not to blame for that alone, we were getting pretty into getting those antidepressant effects from smoking the various things. We also try to avoid being too sleep deprived in part because of how we tend to trip usually (aside from this experiment) not more than once every couple weeks though sometimes less but often not, and we used to take LSD and stay up all night but for years now we've almost exclusively tripped in the morning after getting a full night's sleep and it's been great, we've had plenty of very therapeutic and grounded experiences that way.
We're glad that things got better for you too. Honestly where you are now sounds similar to what we already go through though we followed a slightly different path to it, but I mean, we do have a dissociative disorder. I won't get too much into this myself because it's not my train of thought but Theta has been obsessively researching the overlaps and/or lack thereof between many different psychotic, dissociative, anxiety, and so on disorders and she basically seems to think that there's both a misunderstanding as to how many different types of hallucination-related conditions there actually are as well as to how little differentiation between those conditions there actually is despite that, and that a lot of them could probably be dealt with a lot better if they could be sorted into the right categories to be addressed more so as what they actually specifically are rather than as just various types of psychosis or whatever, specifically thinking that there's also probably a misunderstanding of just how many of them actually relate to things like early life trauma and could be resolved or at least handled if the therapy actually focused on things like working through that trauma instead rather than trying to suppress the symptoms which ultimately just seems to make dissociated content became even stronger and more demanding. She had to help me type that sentence for the record because it's her ideas so she can explain them better herself later lol.
Hope that's a good enough response and we appreciate your kindness once again!!
Hey SnafuInTheVoid, Theta is feeling kind of switchy right now so I'm going to handle this response.
I'll try to keep my answers to your questions straightforward too.We've had insomnia for as long as we can recall and it's one of the most core reasons we smoke cannabis every day, though we'd only have to do it every night for that really. It made us miserable when we were younger as we would toss and turn every night and feel exhausted throughout the days (though also stressed for many other reasons at the time), but cannabis actually helps us so much that it's usually not much of an issue these days as long as we have something to smoke, we pretty easily get a full night's sleep as long as we don't have other reasons to have a more disturbed sleep. Now about the experiences, we weren't really paying too close of attention through the majority of these two months, but we do know that we were sleeping slightly less than normal on at least some nights after some of the various tryptamines trips because there was one time smoking MET one day and then MPT the next when we noted we stayed up all night without intending to just because we had such a bubbly energy.... For the most part though I don't think it was anything too wild, like I think the majority of nights throughout this experience we got at least 6+ hours of sleep and I'm not sure we ever got less than 4 hours. Though, after we smoked the 15 mg of 5-MeO-EiPT we definitely got near the minimum of that for the first several days when we were basically still peaking, I can't imagine we slept very well at all even when we did either but I honestly have no idea because it's so hard for any of us to recall now, but I know we got carried away with how intense it was for the first few days, there was some moment where we realized we hadn't been remembering to eat or go to the bathroom or anything really either, but to be fair we were still incredibly blasted at that time and had no idea it was going to last so long. That was a big part of why we finally transferred over to our parents' house for the rest of the experience though to help make sure we actually stayed on top of that stuff.
We might've had a few drinks over that two month period, but I don't particularly remember a night of drinking standing out, and would say it's actually more likely we didn't drink much because we knew we were actively tripping so much, and we hate risking ruining a trip with the lasting effects of alcohol. I'm pretty sure we took kratom a few times, but the same logic as above applies, we specifically avoided it taking it much because we were actively experimenting with taking psychedelic regularly and paying attention to things like tolerance between them too, and even when we do take kratom we almost exclusively take only one capsule that's it, but we do it for IBS-type issues most often and I'd feel pretty confident in saying we felt that need at least here or there in that time period. For the most part though, no, we mainly use psychedelics and cannabis recreationally anymore. We did start drinking and taking kratom more heavily about maybe a week or week and a half after the lasting 15 mg of 5-MeO-EiPT, I forget when exactly now but we were only doing it to try to end to trippiness with the sedative and antipsychotic (kratom) type effects which was successful, the trip would lessen during their effects but return when they wore off.
We tripped more than we've ever tripped in this period excluding a two week period where we smoked varying amounts of DMT either every day or nearly every day for a couple weeks many years ago, mostly mid-range just to see that that could be done, but we still know people who've tripped more often than we did here too, and on heavier dosages of things. The dates are scattered throughout the report and I don't have them all right in front of me anymore but I'm nearly certain we didn't trip more than three times a week at any point during this, and sometimes only two... mostly in a pattern such that there would be something like three to five days between trips, at least once a full week I think, and sometimes we'd trip two days in a row, so that's when there'd be three a week instead of two. Tolerance was very light, but that was the point of the experiment; since DMT and sometimes 5-MeO-DMT are said by many to be able to be smoked frequently without tolerance, we wanted to see if the same was true for the synthetic analogues, and it definitely is to at least a greater extent than we'd experienced with other psychedelics.
We get that too, Theta's been researching like crazy trying to figure out what exactly happened to us, but this isn't really new, we've always researched and wondered these things about ourselves. I know something Theta was going to mention was that one of the weird difficulties of having DID is that hearing voices and having out-of-body experiences and stuff doesn't actually have to mean you're psychotic and if you do deal with psychotic-type issues or even just have anxiety that you do it can make things especially hard to sort out internally, and that's a lot of what she's been going through lately especially because she seems more sensitive to that kind of stuff than we are too. Anyway any time we've had something more like this happen (we've had some powerful psychedelic trips that seemed to trigger things we suspected were almost like nearly manic episodes particularly for Theta before, but they never went nearly this far) there have also been other clear factors as well such as high amounts of social stress or in this case lack of social contact as well as tripping so often probably played a role though she's not to blame for that alone, we were getting pretty into getting those antidepressant effects from smoking the various things. We also try to avoid being too sleep deprived in part because of how we tend to trip usually (aside from this experiment) not more than once every couple weeks though sometimes less but often not, and we used to take LSD and stay up all night but for years now we've almost exclusively tripped in the morning after getting a full night's sleep and it's been great, we've had plenty of very therapeutic and grounded experiences that way.
We're glad that things got better for you too.
Honestly where you are now sounds similar to what we already go through though we followed a slightly different path to it, but I mean, we do have a dissociative disorder. I won't get too much into this myself because it's not my train of thought but Theta has been obsessively researching the overlaps and/or lack thereof between many different psychotic, dissociative, anxiety, and so on disorders and she basically seems to think that there's both a misunderstanding as to how many different types of hallucination-related conditions there actually are as well as to how little differentiation between those conditions there actually is despite that, and that a lot of them could probably be dealt with a lot better if they could be sorted into the right categories to be addressed more so as what they actually specifically are rather than as just various types of psychosis or whatever, specifically thinking that there's also probably a misunderstanding of just how many of them actually relate to things like early life trauma and could be resolved or at least handled if the therapy actually focused on things like working through that trauma instead rather than trying to suppress the symptoms which ultimately just seems to make dissociated content became even stronger and more demanding. She had to help me type that sentence for the record because it's her ideas so she can explain them better herself later lol.Hope that's a good enough response and we appreciate your kindness once again!!
I felt like I did a sigh of relief and pleasure that grew and grew and grew as I saw myself and this planet and corner of the universe pull further and further away in my mind's eye similar to things that would happen during the internal screaming leading up to hellscape breakthroughs during the 5-MeO-EiPT experience, only this time it was like the whole universe was sighing in relief and pleasure with me until it just snapped into calm, still just lying in bed. There was also a point where I saw a faint spiral of entities reaching out to me, though not actually pulling me in; it was more than I recall seeing (though fainter than the heaviest stuff I've seen) on 5-MeO-MiPT in the past but reminiscent of the moment I realized that spiral of entities was pulling away from me and waving goodbye as we really started coming down from the heaviest part of the 5-MeO-EiPT (lasting) experience. Most of the rest of the experience has been predictable 5-MeO-MiPT, great energetic body high, wonderful orgasm when trying, splendid music enhancement, all not too strong at 5 mg smoked but definitely enough to be enjoyable. Still enjoying the later phase of it pretty well too.