I am going to die
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Jun 21, 2013
- Messages
- 3
I've only smoked DMT once, and it's the reason I'm posting on this website right now. I won't go too much into the details of my experience since this isn't a trip report -- I felt the increasing OM that eventually shattered everything, I felt senses more complex and profound than any of my current five, I encountered the source of all language and temporarily possessed the gift of tongues, I encountered entities who communicated love to me and I communicated love to them, and the last thing I remember is going towards a white light; after that I can't remember, just like I really can't remember any of it as it actually happened, except for when my soul returned to my body and I felt the strongest sense of confidence I've ever felt, and the room seemed to be the working of rotating cogs and gyros -- but what I really want to talk about is what I felt in the days afterwards.
Before smoking DMT I had tried psilocybin mushrooms, salvia divinorum, and some other drugs, but I would consider myself more of a wanna-be psychonaut than an actual one. DMT was the first time, at least since I've left the womb, that I went to the Otherside -- metaphysical reality, hyperspace, the 4th dimension, the spirit world, whatever you wanna call it -- and it shook me to my core in a way that I could not fathom beforehand. I experienced Death, at least part of it, and I feel as if I experienced a thousand lifetimes' worth of information in fifteen minutes. But afterwards, the memory quickly became blurry. The entities that were momentarily more real than my own mother or father vanished into figments of my imagination. What I'm trying to say is that after having the most intense, profound, enlightening experience of my life, I very quickly returned to my old self, largely unchanged save an increased concern over what will happen to me once I die. I'm not sure if I'd call it depression... but I look at old photographs of myself and it's like I'm looking at a stranger or a dead man. The world I inhabit seems shallow, like it's made of shells. At least it did, for the week following the DMT experience. Things have returned to normal now, more or less. So here's my question: has anyone else had a similar experience? Additionally, has anyone smoked DMT once and returned with more questions than answers, and found that their questions were answered after smoking DMT multiple more times? Right now my standing on DMT is this: it shouldn't be done unless in the form of ayahuasca. From what I hear, ayahuasca actually makes sense and provides answers, along with a lasting sense of well being. Also, ayahuasca is natural, while some random dude just cooks up DMT in his kitchen. In my mind, DMT is too powerful of a chemical to fuck with and smoke in the same pipe you smoke weed with while you're sitting on a couch... it should be done in a ritual setting where the spiritual significance is respected, and their is someone or something, either the shaman or the vine, to guide you through. Thoughts?
Before smoking DMT I had tried psilocybin mushrooms, salvia divinorum, and some other drugs, but I would consider myself more of a wanna-be psychonaut than an actual one. DMT was the first time, at least since I've left the womb, that I went to the Otherside -- metaphysical reality, hyperspace, the 4th dimension, the spirit world, whatever you wanna call it -- and it shook me to my core in a way that I could not fathom beforehand. I experienced Death, at least part of it, and I feel as if I experienced a thousand lifetimes' worth of information in fifteen minutes. But afterwards, the memory quickly became blurry. The entities that were momentarily more real than my own mother or father vanished into figments of my imagination. What I'm trying to say is that after having the most intense, profound, enlightening experience of my life, I very quickly returned to my old self, largely unchanged save an increased concern over what will happen to me once I die. I'm not sure if I'd call it depression... but I look at old photographs of myself and it's like I'm looking at a stranger or a dead man. The world I inhabit seems shallow, like it's made of shells. At least it did, for the week following the DMT experience. Things have returned to normal now, more or less. So here's my question: has anyone else had a similar experience? Additionally, has anyone smoked DMT once and returned with more questions than answers, and found that their questions were answered after smoking DMT multiple more times? Right now my standing on DMT is this: it shouldn't be done unless in the form of ayahuasca. From what I hear, ayahuasca actually makes sense and provides answers, along with a lasting sense of well being. Also, ayahuasca is natural, while some random dude just cooks up DMT in his kitchen. In my mind, DMT is too powerful of a chemical to fuck with and smoke in the same pipe you smoke weed with while you're sitting on a couch... it should be done in a ritual setting where the spiritual significance is respected, and their is someone or something, either the shaman or the vine, to guide you through. Thoughts?
