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  • BDD Moderators: Keif’ Richards | negrogesic

Diazepam at work

P

painfulstate

Bluelighter
Joined
Sep 19, 2023
Messages
99
Hey fellow bluelighters. I was a drug addict for a few years on h and uppers mainly..not alcohol ..Now I have some time of sobriety BUT since my work is really stressful and it's hard for me not to snap on random situations..mainly anger and distress due to personal circumstances , I was considering to start a light diazepam dosing in the range of 5-10 mg twice daily ..and keep it this way taking some breaks for tolerance...I also smoke weed which synergies exceptionally with diazepam ...Anyone here with experience on diazepam at work environments I would appreciate your feedback ..also I would like to know if tolerance on small doses like that Is real..thanks
 
What type of work are we talking about? Are we talking cooking food at Arby's, or the captain flying a Boeing 747?

Regardless, 20mg per day is a fairly heavy dose to start out with if you have no tolerance. This is enough to potentially make you stumble around a bit and make people suspect you are drunk (if they watch you for that). This is certainly enough to be dangerous if you work around heavy machinery.

After a week or two, 10-20mg won't do that much, and you will want to take more most likely.

I would not advise you start taking benzos daily simply for stress at work. This will lead to much bigger problems than work stress down the road.
 
What about smaller doses dude .. like 5mg twice daily? I don't operate machinery or anything it's mainly office work and outside responsibilities like going to public services ... I don't know but I feel being mad and stressed half the day is doing more damage and ruins relationships at this point in my life..because of my fucking tempermet
 
5-10mg per day is what a doctor would start you out on, it's also got a long half life and builds up in your system.

It's a completely understandable and relatable idea, but if it was me, it would eventually lead me to a nasty benzo dependence, or a relapse, but most likely both. I do not take benzos long term for major reasons, even though I have clinical anxiety, actually need them for psychiatric reasons, and my first script to xanax was when I was 17. I generally avoid them unless I need them for withdrawal, because I have an extremely hard time stopping the daily dosing past a certain point. For me, benzo withdrawal is worse than opioids.

Everyone is different. You know yourself best.

Also, paradoxical effects from benzos aren't that rare. It could potentially worsen your mood or anger, and/or cause you to snap at your coworkers with less inhibition.
 
Quasimoto said:
5-10mg per day is what a doctor would start you out on, it's also got a long half life and builds up in your system.

It's a completely understandable and relatable idea, but if it was me, it would eventually lead me to a nasty benzo dependence, or a relapse, but most likely both. I do not take benzos long term for major reasons, even though I have clinical anxiety, actually need them for psychiatric reasons, and my first script to xanax was when I was 17. I generally avoid them unless I need them for withdrawal, because I have an extremely hard time stopping the daily dosing past a certain point. For me, benzo withdrawal is worse than opioids.

Everyone is different. You know yourself best.

Also, paradoxical effects from benzos aren't that rare. It could potentially worsen your mood or anger, and/or cause you to snap at your coworkers with less inhibition.
Click to expand...
Exactly
 
Sorry to hear about your difficulty dealing with anger and stress at work. I'm afraid my answer here is probably not something you want to hear, but I have to give you a heads up.

also I would like to know if tolerance on small doses like that Is real..thanks
Click to expand...

Yes, absolutely. Tolerance is more insidious than you might think. Unfortunately, if you end up using diazepam or other benzos with some regularity, taking a week off now and then will not completely reset your tolerance. The breaks will help, for sure, but a real reset of tolerance takes much longer than a week or two.

Anyway...

You plan to take diazepam daily with occasional breaks to avoid addiction. Sounds reasonable and understandable. The issue I could see is that when you take your breaks, you will probably have a bit of a rebound effect which will see your stress and frustration levels spiking. After a while, the days when you're not taking it will be unbearable. Then there's the temptation to have fewer break days. The other thing which someone has already mentioned is that with daily use the effects will quickly become less noticeable, and then there's the temptation to increase the dose.

Have you ever tried kava? If you can find some good instant stuff, that can be a viable alternative to the diazepam. It has a similar feeling but it's much milder. Still, it does work and it can go very nicely together with the green herb.
 
painfulstate said:
Hey fellow bluelighters. I was a drug addict for a few years on h and uppers mainly..not alcohol ..Now I have some time of sobriety BUT since my work is really stressful and it's hard for me not to snap on random situations..mainly anger and distress due to personal circumstances , I was considering to start a light diazepam dosing in the range of 5-10 mg twice daily ..and keep it this way taking some breaks for tolerance...I also smoke weed which synergies exceptionally with diazepam ...Anyone here with experience on diazepam at work environments I would appreciate your feedback ..also I would like to know if tolerance on small doses like that Is real..thanks
Click to expand...
As Quasimoto wrote 20 mg is a heavy dose, Alcohol tolerant or not. The starting dose at my one and only detox exp.
After that 1-st dose started working i was forced to go to bed, was still morning att. Next dose same,
they woke me inbetween for meals and such. But that afternoon was spent sleeping to, then at night another 40 mg.

Lights out but as i allready had more then enough rest, the latter part of the night was spend woken but stoned.
Watching tv trying to read till morning came.

It was that strong, that i asked to 1/2 my dose next day, an addict who asks a smaller dose is contradictional.
But that was how strong it was, wasn t even benzo naieve, Diazepam is just a beast, like the most heavy machine among benzo s.

5 days, last day 10 mg, 12 days after cessation i was still feeling the Diazepam, a sort of stoney like substitute. The day i left.
So the halflive is so long technically everyday dosing is not necessary. And don t underestimate it 1 day 2 x 5 mg,
might get you through 3 days depending on your prsonal chemistry. 10 mg at once seems a bit much for work imo.

Less dangerous options are available but ime they hardly help:
Ashwaghanda, Lemon Balm, Passiflora Incarnata and/ or a good fresh root Valerian tincture.
 
painfulstate said:
Hey fellow bluelighters. I was a drug addict for a few years on h and uppers mainly..not alcohol ..Now I have some time of sobriety BUT since my work is really stressful and it's hard for me not to snap on random situations..mainly anger and distress due to personal circumstances , I was considering to start a light diazepam dosing in the range of 5-10 mg twice daily ..and keep it this way taking some breaks for tolerance...I also smoke weed which synergies exceptionally with diazepam ...Anyone here with experience on diazepam at work environments I would appreciate your feedback ..also I would like to know if tolerance on small doses like that Is real..thanks
Click to expand...
I work in what seems largely like a somewhat similar customer facing role, including occasional driving.

I'm prescribed 3 times 2mg clonazepam a day.

I rarely, rarely take all 3, and if I do it's never just over the course of the day (prescribed three times a day). Depending on the work day I will generally take 3-4mg of clonazepam before and throughout the work day, and maybe half of the time I'll take another 1mg after work to help wind down mentally. Even less is taken on days that I don't work. I also take gabapentin, and play with my doses in a similar way, as well as vaporizing 2g carts every week or so.

My reasoning here is essentially just that by minimizing usage I'm keeping my tolerance lower, so that it will (and it absolutely does, from my experience) work slightly better the next time I take it.

My generalized anxiety disorder runs strong, and it takes daily benzos for me to function in this society and clonazepam and Valium are different, mostly in that the former is much stronger, has shorter metabolite half lives (although still long), and has a longer duration than Valium (sources say different things); Compared to clonazepam it's much more subtle, although in high enough doses a tiny bit sedating (for me personally, whereas no sane amount of clonazepam, sedates me.

These are my experiences with using clonazepam in a largely retail customer service based work place that specializes in a specific niche. This drug (and xanax before it, which for GAD is inferior, even the XR tablets which only last about 10-12 hours) make this kind of job (which fits me best, and as such as such I have spent the vast majority of my 20 year working experience in mostly customer service) possible for me to do, maintain, and not feel like things are falling apart.

I have an addictive personality as well and almost every day, (aside from my initial morning dose) I try to double check with myself whether I really need this drug right now and whether this dose is more than I need. If I'm not at work I can usually take off some of the edge by using excessive cannabis and/or upping/spacing out my daily gabapentin, which is 800mg three times daily.


TLDR; Valium (and other benzos) can be used responsibly in some work settings but if you have an addictive personality any benzo script can very quickly become a double bladed sword. I highly recommend setting aside only your dose for the day, and maybe 1 additional pill in case of emergency or even if just for peace of mind, and then not touching the OG bottle for the rest of the day. Just put it out of your memory; after you set out the days dose, whatever else is in the bottle functionally shouldn't exist to you until the next morning. Put your pills for the day in a separate bottle, and then only take from that bottle, or you may easily be starting down a SLIPPERLy road that can end in death.

Daily, or even close to daily benzo use, especially for people like us, is doable, although ideally I'd keep your usage as minimal as you can comfortably tolerate, and stick with Valium over a higher potency benzo like xanax (alprazolam) or clonazepam, as it's much easier to get off of.

I wish you luck, and if you haven't tried learning at least some basic breathing and/or meditation techniques, I would highly recommend that as well as eliminating negative self talk regarding natural ways of reducing anxiety.
 
Quasimoto said:
5-10mg per day is what a doctor would start you out on, it's also got a long half life and builds up in your system.

It's a completely understandable and relatable idea, but if it was me, it would eventually lead me to a nasty benzo dependence, or a relapse, but most likely both. I do not take benzos long term for major reasons, even though I have clinical anxiety, actually need them for psychiatric reasons, and my first script to xanax was when I was 17. I generally avoid them unless I need them for withdrawal, because I have an extremely hard time stopping the daily dosing past a certain point. For me, benzo withdrawal is worse than opioids.

Everyone is different. You know yourself best.

Also, paradoxical effects from benzos aren't that rare. It could potentially worsen your mood or anger, and/or cause you to snap at your coworkers with less inhibition.
Click to expand...
I would agree with the sentiment that benzo wd's are worse than opioid wd's.

It is also extremely important to note that benzo withdrawal's can in the extreme (high dose, going cold turkey) cause seizures, [Disclaimer; I'm obviously not a doctor, I'm not now nor have I ever given medical advice], and that would eventually lead to death.
 
I would agree with the sentiment that benzo wd's are worse than opioid wd's.
Click to expand...

I also concur with this.

I have far more experience with opiate WDs but benzo WDs are a different beast that I want to avoid at all costs. I only had one really bad case but that single case (some 15 years ago) changed the way I used benzos forever more.

One of the horrors of benzo withdrawal I recall was that I would have intense anxiety, and knowing that seizures (and even death in the worst case) are possible just pushes that anxiety up a few notches. You start thinking 'what if I am about to have a grand mal?!' and your body starts vibrating in tension and fear... horrific.

During the worst WDs I had from benzos I felt like my brain was damaged - I'd suddenly 'get lost' on my own street, where logically I knew that the area was familiar but I couldn't figure out where I was supposed to go. It was hard to think and even put sentences together at times. Frightening stuff.
 
painfulstate said:
Hey fellow bluelighters. I was a drug addict for a few years on h and uppers mainly..not alcohol ..Now I have some time of sobriety BUT since my work is really stressful and it's hard for me not to snap on random situations..mainly anger and distress due to personal circumstances , I was considering to start a light diazepam dosing in the range of 5-10 mg twice daily ..and keep it this way taking some breaks for tolerance...I also smoke weed which synergies exceptionally with diazepam ...Anyone here with experience on diazepam at work environments I would appreciate your feedback ..also I would like to know if tolerance on small doses like that Is real..thanks
Click to expand...
So, you're prone to addiction and you are thinking of starting to take a reasonably high daily dose of a notoriously addictive substance commonly held to have devastating consequences upon withdrawal. Ok

Yes, tolernace is real. Tolerance, dependence, addiction is the usual route. The valium will 'work' very well at first. Especially as you'll be taking them medicinally - it will seem like a miracle drug! Praise be! You'll then want to repeat that medical miracle. After a fairly short time you'll need higher dose to get same effect....and then....

Benzos, once weekly at the most really, if that. I've heard your secenario 100 times and the only times (rare, too) that it's ended well is when user has realised very quickly that they're on a slippery slope. Perhaps you'll be clever enough not to begin the slide in the first place
 
emkee_reinvented said:
So the halflive is so long technically everyday dosing is not necessary. And don t underestimate it 1 day 2 x 5 mg,
might get you through 3 days depending on your prsonal chemistry. 10 mg at once seems a bit much for work imo.
Click to expand...

Yep. If you took 10mg one morning, you would still be feeling it the 24hr later. If you took another 10mg the second day, it would effectively be like taking 20mg+, because first dose is still in your system.

The half life is 40-200 hours.

If someone without tolerance started taking 20mg per day, by day 2-3 they would be pretty fucked up, amnesiac, etc.
 
The addiction 'dr' did a test. To test your ? sobriety/ WD intensity/ brainskills.
That test went so bad [edit: just passed ], i observerd without care how much IQ drop that lingering Diazepam costed.
Afterwards, not att it actually makes you dumb unlike THC.

Dr. had a good laugh, basterd, and let me pass cause it was most probably that Pam was the cause,
of me giving answers drawings of blocks and clocks. Diazepam makes you a retard you just don t care, so i also had a laugh.
5 days taking 19 days later still in my blood, like THC, but noticeable unlike the THC.

Went home with a Diazepam stone. Which was good as public transport was hell that day, trip back took twice as long.
But no care in the word when still in a benzo haze, otherwise aggitation/ irritation would have skyrocketed.
Heat, load of carriage 6 instead of 3 hours to get home. 😐 & 👍, was my emotional state.

Till i found out that idiot also had been poisoning everyone with laxatives.
Magnesium Hydroxide, reasoning all addict have a lack of Mg. So confronted him with the fact why prescribe a laxative for of it ?
And not a form that gets absorbed at least like Taurate or BisGlycinate, he had no clue.

After loosing 10 kilos and everyday power shit, looking on internet i did knew.
 
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I struggle a lot with anger issues. It is shitty, because it can be soooo hard to regulate yourself if you have that tendency, and you can cause serious harm in relationships in just few seconds, or worse.

-Daily benzodiazepine regimen eventually leads to tolerance to many desired effects, sometimes even complete tolerance, while cognitive issues and disinhibition can actually get worse over time. So it could easily just make the issue worse over time. Benzos make me more good-tempered in short term, but when I was doing them daily for a year, it eventually made me unstable, depressed, frustrated and stuff.
-Being high on work can cause paranoid thoughts and anxiety, because you have a secret (at least if it is not prescribed by doctor) and that way can make the issue worse.

Have you tried things like propranolol, antihistamines or clonidine? Those generally have less side effects and are easier to get off, of course preferably tapering. If you use caffeine, I also suggest you try decreasing intake to one cup in the morning or something.
 
Pissed_and_messed said:
I struggle a lot with anger issues. It is shitty, because it can be soooo hard to regulate yourself if you have that tendency, and you can cause serious harm in relationships in just few seconds, or worse.

-Daily benzodiazepine regimen eventually leads to tolerance to many desired effects, sometimes even complete tolerance, while cognitive issues and disinhibition can actually get worse over time. So it could easily just make the issue worse over time. Benzos make me more good-tempered in short term, but when I was doing them daily for a year, it eventually made me unstable, depressed, frustrated and stuff.
-Being high on work can cause paranoid thoughts and anxiety, because you have a secret (at least if it is not prescribed by doctor) and that way can make the issue worse.

Have you tried things like propranolol, antihistamines or clonidine? Those generally have less side effects and are easier to get off, of course preferably tapering. If you use caffeine, I also suggest you try decreasing intake to one cup in the morning or something.
Click to expand...
Me not ;) , just became a easy aggitated/ aggrivated and irritated person. Especially if your asking.
Explaining why almost any gouvernement organisation either blocked my email or skip my mails.

No regulation whatsoever, useful tool but not towards loved ones. Get your struggle it doesn t go well with,
relationsships. But its also tireing, always pondering and making excuses when again someone.
Feels i stood on his or her private parts, while i am actually holding myself in.

So its mostly, non-sense, facts, sarcasme/ cynisme or songs. No one gets its my teporarly relieve for stress they caused.
Basickly a 🔄 with no real use, the other mostly in the abyss on what next. Should stop it.

@painfulstate, you mentioned Weed. Knowing there are now less psychedelic/ less anxiety causing Cannabinoids.
Depending where you live, i tried a HHC, HHC-p and Terpinoids vape.
Read on delta-8 & 10 THC and THC-o. All seem more relaxing and maybe even a bit anti-anxiety like.
Only trialed the HHC en HHC-p combo, and amazed by the difference in effects with Weed.
Milder, relaxing, more functionable and less noticeable.

Safer as geting hooked on Benzo s, can you use that in case of emergencys.
 
Expect memory issues (that was the worst symptom for me - had to write everything down) and tenfold anxiety when you don't have any. This can be debilitating to the point where you may miss work - benzo withdrawals are worse than heroin withdrawals and can kill you. If you insist on taking them I'd keep it to 5-10mgs a day but not every day because your tolerance is going to build extremely fast.
 
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