Emptyhandz
Greenlighter
- Joined
- Jun 3, 2013
- Messages
- 6
New Life: Day 1
My first day, on a multiple-attempted, kicking of the drug heroin. Well, this time I feel serious. Like, I need to actually stop, because not only is my life turning into stagnant water, but more importantly, my beloved girlfriend’s life is going down the drain. This is due to my responsibility I believe. Although she wants to do it as much as I do, she simply does not have money. Therefore, I pop into the will money that my grandfather left me, and buy some healing medicine. Well, after about9 months of not only spending my work paycheck on getting better, but spending my grandfathers money, I only have half of what he gave me left (let alone no money in my account I make from work). Therefore, for my girlfriend (mostly) for my money, and for my family, I have decided to lay off the dope. So, here is a diagnosis of the first day. P.S. I do have suboxones, so it shouldn’t be too bad.
First day, I smoked right when I woke up. Then smoked and snorted some more at my drummer’s house, where we play music for a HUGE A&R SHOW we have coming up. The last time I did a line or took a hit was roughly around 5 or 5:30. Been sober ever since. However, when me and my girl got home, which was 11:30ish, I gave her ½ a Xanax, and took a full one to myself. Then, I left her place, drove to 7/11, bought myself a tall can and a pack of cigarettes, and figured I’d sit here to let you know how it goes.
Right now, I feel pretty kick back. No signs of withdrawals (yet). Just calmness and laziness (thanks to the Xani). My plan: pass out after the beer, and maybe another ½ bar of xani, and wake up kicking. Bones hurting, muscles aching, stomach rumbling, restless leg syndrome, hot sweats, you name it. However, when this happens, I am going to slip half of an 8 mg suboxone under my tongue, and let it stay there till it disappears. Then take the other ½ of my xani bar, and pass out. (Or I’ll take the ½ bar before the suboxone). This should allow me to sleep off the rest of the pain while the Xanax kicks in, and I should be all right after that. I may have updates if tonight works out differently, or I may just be back tomorrow to let you know how I feel. Either way, it is 1:29 am, and I took the full Xani bar an hour ago. I am currently drinking a bear, and am expecting to get knocked out at any moment. If things go differently, I will let you know. Either way, the whole point of this journal is to let you know how MY kick goes. I know other people kick in different ways, but I figured my kick is worth documenting at least once. Anyways, wish me luck friends, and you’ll be hearing from me soon. P.S. If you stay tuned, I will tell you how I am bringing MY beloved, wonderful girlfriend’s life into nothing but a fucking reck-of-the-best trainwreck.
-This is Michael, aka Emptyhandz, reporting out at 1:31 am Aug 1. I will report back when I am able. Thanks for those, or any, of you who have read.
Look forward to my progress/digress of this attempt to get clean.
My first day, on a multiple-attempted, kicking of the drug heroin. Well, this time I feel serious. Like, I need to actually stop, because not only is my life turning into stagnant water, but more importantly, my beloved girlfriend’s life is going down the drain. This is due to my responsibility I believe. Although she wants to do it as much as I do, she simply does not have money. Therefore, I pop into the will money that my grandfather left me, and buy some healing medicine. Well, after about9 months of not only spending my work paycheck on getting better, but spending my grandfathers money, I only have half of what he gave me left (let alone no money in my account I make from work). Therefore, for my girlfriend (mostly) for my money, and for my family, I have decided to lay off the dope. So, here is a diagnosis of the first day. P.S. I do have suboxones, so it shouldn’t be too bad.
First day, I smoked right when I woke up. Then smoked and snorted some more at my drummer’s house, where we play music for a HUGE A&R SHOW we have coming up. The last time I did a line or took a hit was roughly around 5 or 5:30. Been sober ever since. However, when me and my girl got home, which was 11:30ish, I gave her ½ a Xanax, and took a full one to myself. Then, I left her place, drove to 7/11, bought myself a tall can and a pack of cigarettes, and figured I’d sit here to let you know how it goes.
Right now, I feel pretty kick back. No signs of withdrawals (yet). Just calmness and laziness (thanks to the Xani). My plan: pass out after the beer, and maybe another ½ bar of xani, and wake up kicking. Bones hurting, muscles aching, stomach rumbling, restless leg syndrome, hot sweats, you name it. However, when this happens, I am going to slip half of an 8 mg suboxone under my tongue, and let it stay there till it disappears. Then take the other ½ of my xani bar, and pass out. (Or I’ll take the ½ bar before the suboxone). This should allow me to sleep off the rest of the pain while the Xanax kicks in, and I should be all right after that. I may have updates if tonight works out differently, or I may just be back tomorrow to let you know how I feel. Either way, it is 1:29 am, and I took the full Xani bar an hour ago. I am currently drinking a bear, and am expecting to get knocked out at any moment. If things go differently, I will let you know. Either way, the whole point of this journal is to let you know how MY kick goes. I know other people kick in different ways, but I figured my kick is worth documenting at least once. Anyways, wish me luck friends, and you’ll be hearing from me soon. P.S. If you stay tuned, I will tell you how I am bringing MY beloved, wonderful girlfriend’s life into nothing but a fucking reck-of-the-best trainwreck.
-This is Michael, aka Emptyhandz, reporting out at 1:31 am Aug 1. I will report back when I am able. Thanks for those, or any, of you who have read.
Look forward to my progress/digress of this attempt to get clean.
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