stardreamer
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Apr 16, 2002
- Messages
- 737
Amphetamines - Moderate - How to Love Everything
There was a brief time in my life when I got to know amphetamines very well, specifically dextroamphetamine. I aquired 20 of the 15mg Dexedrine Time Release capsules from a friend and had possibly the best week of my life. This is my story.
My trip started on a tuesday morning at school. After short debate, I decided to take 3 capsules (45mg time release) first thing in the morning. An hour passed and I felt nothing, then another half hour, still nothing. I was just beginning to think "what a dud" when the rush hit me. It was like nothing I'd ever done. I felt warm and fuzzy, alert and in control, and most of all I felt a unique happiness with everyone and everything.
The first day at school the world was mine, I talked to people I didn't know and they loved me. I had this overwhelming sense of confidence and charm, and whatever I felt like doing I did it. I would talk to hot girls I didn't know and have incredible, friendly conversations. It was amazing. About 5 o clock I was home and getting tired, so I took 2 more pills. Before 5 minutes had passed my rush came back and I knew the second pills hadnt come on yet, so about an hour later it hit me harder. I called everyone I knew cause I just wanted to talk and it felt so good to connect with people and be totally open.
Nights were a blur, I never actually slept but I wasn't awake. I was in limbo waiting happily for the sun to rise and get back to school. I remember talking to my brother on the phone and realizing how lucky I was to have him. I applied that same affection to other people now, and for the next few days I took nothing for granted. Whenever I would slow down, I'd take one or two more pills and pick myself up. It just felt too good to stop, so I didn't.
Before I knew it friday rolled around and I was on my last dose. I felt drained yet alert, my body was incredibly slow and I had lost about 12 pounds because food just never entered my mind.
I went home that day and literally hit the floor sleeping, I woke up 9 o clock saturday night feeling like my mind and body had been hit by a truck. I lost the love I had found, but I remembered it. If I could go back, I wouldn't change a thing.
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In retrospect, I realize how speed had pulled me in. I'm glad I had a limited supply, although I know I could have stopped then anyway. I don't mean to glamorize stimulants, because I realize now that like any drug, the love I had was real, but the truth of temporarity hit me like a brick in the head. I learned to always respect my substance, and more importantly respect myself to stop when I was in over my head. Peace out.
There was a brief time in my life when I got to know amphetamines very well, specifically dextroamphetamine. I aquired 20 of the 15mg Dexedrine Time Release capsules from a friend and had possibly the best week of my life. This is my story.
My trip started on a tuesday morning at school. After short debate, I decided to take 3 capsules (45mg time release) first thing in the morning. An hour passed and I felt nothing, then another half hour, still nothing. I was just beginning to think "what a dud" when the rush hit me. It was like nothing I'd ever done. I felt warm and fuzzy, alert and in control, and most of all I felt a unique happiness with everyone and everything.
The first day at school the world was mine, I talked to people I didn't know and they loved me. I had this overwhelming sense of confidence and charm, and whatever I felt like doing I did it. I would talk to hot girls I didn't know and have incredible, friendly conversations. It was amazing. About 5 o clock I was home and getting tired, so I took 2 more pills. Before 5 minutes had passed my rush came back and I knew the second pills hadnt come on yet, so about an hour later it hit me harder. I called everyone I knew cause I just wanted to talk and it felt so good to connect with people and be totally open.
Nights were a blur, I never actually slept but I wasn't awake. I was in limbo waiting happily for the sun to rise and get back to school. I remember talking to my brother on the phone and realizing how lucky I was to have him. I applied that same affection to other people now, and for the next few days I took nothing for granted. Whenever I would slow down, I'd take one or two more pills and pick myself up. It just felt too good to stop, so I didn't.
Before I knew it friday rolled around and I was on my last dose. I felt drained yet alert, my body was incredibly slow and I had lost about 12 pounds because food just never entered my mind.
I went home that day and literally hit the floor sleeping, I woke up 9 o clock saturday night feeling like my mind and body had been hit by a truck. I lost the love I had found, but I remembered it. If I could go back, I wouldn't change a thing.
-------------------------
In retrospect, I realize how speed had pulled me in. I'm glad I had a limited supply, although I know I could have stopped then anyway. I don't mean to glamorize stimulants, because I realize now that like any drug, the love I had was real, but the truth of temporarity hit me like a brick in the head. I learned to always respect my substance, and more importantly respect myself to stop when I was in over my head. Peace out.
