Detoxing off Opiates (Long Story) - Day 5

[A.m.Tilts]

Today is day 5 into detoxing from pain killers. I'm doing it at home with the support of my family, who have been wonderful and are really excited to see me clean. I'm still having Chills (Pins/Needles), extreme muscle fatigue, fire shites, Restless Legs, no sleep for longer than 30 min., and racing thoughts in my head everytime I close my eyes. Please tell me this is going to get better!

I started taking opiates in 2006 being prescribed by my doctor for bulging discs in my L-5 spine. At the time, I was using pot, coke, and x on a regular basis. I researched all about opiates, which ones were the best, and when I saw my doc, I played dumb, pretended not to know anything about pain medicine. He perceived me as a healthy, fit (which I was at the time), and non addictive person who had just popped this disc out working out (which I did), and now is in extreme pain. The truth was, I wasn't in as much pain as I said I was, because I was working out regularly and I kept my core (abs, and lower back) muscles fit so the pain was pretty minimal.

However, I was on a mission to get the best of the best through my doc pill-wise, so I kept going back and complaining about the the pain. He started me on Percocet 5mgs, which moved very steadily to oxy ir 5mgs and fentanyl patches of 125mcs, replaced every two days. Well needless to say, I was hooked bad. with the fentanyl being constantly in my system, I believe my tolerance raised very fast. Soon after, I had my first withdrawal when I woke up one morning and needed to change my patches. Ill never forget the thoughts going thru my head when I woke up with chills/sweats, etc.

In about the span of a year or two, I had worked myself up to Opana 60mgs (1 40mg and 1 20 mg) three times a day, with roxi 30s for breakthru. This is where I start to lose control. I had to follow a physical therapy schedule as a condition of my doc treating me, so I would get so messed up when I went to my therapy sessions, that the counselor finally contacted my doc and told him that im slurring my speech and falling asleep in therapy. Right away, I was given tapering off scripts for Opana (which I never followed) and my doc told me he couldn't treat me anymore. Soon after my Opana ran out, I was buying pills on the street through a couple different people, but it would never be enough to get me thru. I was waking up everyday sick, and felt so helpless that I was so chained to this addiction.

Fast forward to last year, I decide enough is enough, I'm just going to go to the methadone clinic and get stable so I can live without looking for pills all day. Well the methadone clinic worked wonders, I had stopped at 120mg, and didnt feel sick anymore in the morning. I got a great job and could not only hold it down, but was also one of the best there. Things were going great as long as my opiate receptors were constantly filled, but then I got bored and started buying coke and oxys on a regular basis. One year later I was administratively detoxed from the program for bad UAs, Feb. 28 was my last dose. I thought, this is great, Ill just kick opiates and everything will be great. Well my life became so fucked up after I was detoxed, that I had crashed two of my cars in two consecutive days, and am now on a 4-month revocation for my license.

So I was sick for a couple days, when finally, I got a connect for Ds and Morphine ER 200s. This kept me going at work all the way until last saturday when I ran out. So here I am, still detoxing, feeling like shit, but having this small reserved hope that I can finally put this life behind me and live like I should be living! I feel like I've made it this far, that it should only be a matter of time before I finally put this in my past. I have too much to live for (wife, 3 kids) and I'm only 24.

Sorry for the long post, I just had to get my story out.

 

[theseeker]

Hey man- good luck with getting clean. Opiate addiction is such a ball and chain and good for you you're at a point where you're ready to cast it off. Have you thought about maybe going to therapy to explore the drug use? I know opiates have always filled these gaping holes in my life that I'm just beginning to see. It might help you stay clean too.

 

[theartofwar]

Hang in man , day 5 you are already over the hill and are turning the corner rapidly. Sleep and anxiety are the last things that come to me (i've used for 8 years now I'm on nearly 3 weeks clean). I would really recommend finding something, be it IOP , meetings - anything to make sure you are filling the void opiates leave in you. Statistics are quite frankly never on our side, relapse is a 93% at the last detox I was at. Remember these days - try not to dwell on the highs of using (I know how hard this , believe me I only seem to remember the glory days of so called bliss, not the constant struggle tearing apart and away everythng I held near and dear to me). Best of luck, if you find yourself struggling please feel free to PM me , I've been up and down and paved the opiate highway a hundred times. It gets harder each time I relapse, and at this point I don't know if I will survive another run - please take it to heart bro , it is not worth your life and opiates will take it from you.

 

[OpiYum]

Yea, u are almost done. Considering that u are getting off morphines (I think). Like suboxone and methadone and oxycontin are such long releases that the kick is long in duration, unlike heroin which is like 3-5 days. So, since u are at day 5, like taow said, you are over the hill.

Congratulations. Im proud of u

 

[Ixchellian]

The worst and longest acute phase WDs I ever had was off of morphine ER and dilaudid.... that would last about 9 days, with the first 5 being the most horrible. I relapsed then for sheer of self-preservation, as it was literally killing me. My dealer got worried after not hearing from me, and after crawling in the window, comped me his whole personal walking stash out of sheer fright..... dehydration, no food, and protracted junk-sickness had almost done me in, and failing saline IV, a good couple hits was the only immediate way for me to keep fluids down.....

That taught me the most important thing in a kick is support..... even if its from a dealer with a conscience.

You've got a wife and family.... they offer by far the best detox program yet devised.

Day 4-5 is the hump for the worst acute WDs.... after that its just a matter of support and willpower during times of weakness. Just remember that with junk, a moment of weakness can come when you least expect, and a long time down the road.

When that happens, just remember; acknowledge the craving... and then eat an ice cream cone.

 

[ykm420]

Stay up, brother. I'm right here with you, I feel like shit, but, it's for the best.. Opana / Fentanyl withdrawls were the WORST I've ever experienced.. I was doing massive amounts of Oxymorphone a day, then those ran out, and I got on fentanyl (100mcg daily in my mouth, new patch on the daily) Went CT of those, and all hell broke loose.