Detox: The hardest part.

[Sweetsomniferum]

After the physical suffering eases, Her sudden absence provokes grief -- I have lost something/Someone whom I love. During the two long periods of abstinence (approx. 1 year each) that I underwent between 1997-present, I often felt very sad. Old love songs would fill my eyes with tears. Returning to Her after these periods of abstinence inspired such joy -- the gnawing emptiness filled. I am currently detoxing from methadone due a move to a remote area. Detoxing is ugly & agonizing; I joyfully imagine re-uniting with Her in a new, beautiful place.

 

[theseeker]

Hands down- the hardest part for me is the sleepless nights with RLS. The soul crushing depression is a close second. I've just gotta say, though, I think sometimes I build up w/d to be a bigger deal than it really is.

All the best.

 

[AnnArbor]

The hardest part for me is the mental aspect. After about 24 hours of detoxing I start to really get into my head. I start thinking if I should let my family in on what I am doing. I go back and forth thinking "they will probably understand and maybe make me more comfortable and help me".. then the other part of me thinks "no this is something they will remember and judge you for for the rest of your life.. they're not like you, they don't know people like you, they don't realize how many people actually go through this and will think bad of you". It's a struggle that I go through every time my dealer is out or I think about detoxing. Also, its strange.. I broke up with my long time girlfriend (we were together for about 5 years.. I was with her from age 19-24.. I am 25 right now) a year ago and whenever I try to kick vicodin she always comes into my mind. I get tempted to call her and try to get her back (i broke up with her) and I have all these thoughts that I'm finally ready to slow down and commit to her and start a family in the not too distant future (which is what she wanted). We're on good terms and are friendly, but only talk maybe every other month. So this is another one of those struggles in my mind where I wonder if she will be happy I started being interested in her again, or if she will think its kinda random and wonder whats up with me. Anyways- I only work 3 days a week and am thinking about taking the three days off soon and ill have a total of 10 days off in a row. The mental part is always the toughest for me.. that along with the boredom and diarrhea -_-. but ive never really intentionally detoxed.. it was just 2-3 days while i couldn't find any. I really want to be prepared and give it a good shot sometime in the next month.

 

[happydaze21]

I would have to say the insomnia is the worst and the fact that you can't get comfortable because you have to get up every ten minutes to piss and shit. However the PAWS puts it all to shame and is where most relapse.

 

[Jabberwocky]

As others have also said, the insomnia and diarrhea, along with depression and PAWS (well, to be honest, I haven't exactly gotten to this stage yet), were the hardest part for me. That being said, the most difficult thing about WD that trumps all else in my experience is trying to do it alone. Every time I've tried to get sober by myself I've failed miserably. I mean, things like BL and TDS are good, and definitely a start, and might work for you. But I don't think anything helps more than a fellow recovering addict, especially one who you can really get along and empathize with (doesn't hurt if you have the same DOC too). Just my 0.02

To the OP:

Keep up the good work though! The most important thing is you keep struggling, keep up the good fight. As I think I posted in a thread I started last week today, "Struggle and Emerge." Success is not guaranteed by any means, but, that being said, you can fucking do it my friend!