Depression (the drugs stop all bad feelings... but all the good feelings too)

[themdyaunome]

Ive been battling depression and anxiety off and on for the last 6 or so years. Ive been on zoloft, prozac, wellbutrin, a few supplements such as st johns wort, etc. I now only take xanax cause it helped with all my symptons for a bit, but the magic is gone and Im pretty much on the verge of severe depression again. With all three of those ssri's, they did stop the depression, but they didnt make me happy either. I felt like a walking zombie. I remembered thinking when I was with my ex of 3 years that I didnt feel that I loved her anymore. So I got off all of those and never went back to something similar.

I cant handle it anymore, however, and need something for my depression. I see my psychiatrist in about a month. Has anyone had any similar issues and found something that helped? Any advice would be appreciated.

 

[suessmayr]

Get off the benzos!!! Benzos induce depression; my mood improved immeasurably when I got off xanax and valium. When I was still taking them, however, I tried Cymbalta, Zoloft, Prozac, Lamictal, Lithium, Epilim, Modafinil, Abilify, Effexor, Cipramil, Avanza and Pristiq and they all did more harm than good. Actually Avanza worked for about 5 days before stopping.

Emphatically, get off the benzos!!

S

 

[amapola]

I'm going to send this over to TDS for you themdyaunome as the people over there are much more experienced in dealing with emotional/mental problems such as this.

With all three of those ssri's, they did stop the depression, but they didnt make me happy either. I felt like a walking zombie.

This does sound like it is a rock and a hard place eh All I can say is I sympathize and hope you find a solution or at the very least a way to minimize the issues that works for you.

Best of luck.

OD >>> TDS

 

[Dave]

That's not an uncommon complaint, that one's depression meds just kill emotion. Have you tried any non-pharmaceutical treatments? For me, the thing that worked best was seeing a psychologist and receiving EMDR therapy (in conjunction with some client-centred therapy and CBT). Didn't clear me up 100%, but show me someone who is never depressed and I'll show you someone who is completely out of tune with their emotional state.

YMMV, of course, but in the end the therapy route worked heaps better than SSRIs, benzos, herbal remedies, and any number of other self-directed help. Sometimes, you need a guide.

 

[SciCo]

Been on zoloft, lexapro and now pristiq. Pristiq made me happy for a while, but now just makes me feel cracked out and I'm still depressed as heck. Ditto the above comment about xanax making you more depressed. I've heard that numerous times; def true for me, especially if I'm taking more than I should be (my tolerance level went way up). Dunno what the answer is, I've been dealing with severe depression my whole life, haven't found it. Anyway, I feel your pain.

 

[n3ophy7e]

Ive been battling depression and anxiety off and on for the last 6 or so years. Ive been on zoloft, prozac, wellbutrin, a few supplements such as st johns wort, etc. I now only take xanax cause it helped with all my symptons for a bit, but the magic is gone and Im pretty much on the verge of severe depression again.

I will echo what others have said in that benzos (while they are great for anxiety) are contraindicated for depression. When you tried those anti-depressants, were you on the xanax at the same time??

I see my psychiatrist in about a month.

How frequently do you see your psychiatrist?? Perhaps you should consider seeing them more frequently, or if that is not feasible, perhaps you could begin therapy with a psychologist or counsellor for a course of CBT or something similar. If you're really struggling with your symptoms you need much more frequent contact with a psych specialist than once a month (or however often you're seeing your psych now).

 

[oliphill]

Benzos is not a good long term answer. Bear in mind if you do come off them though, it will most likely be worse for a while. I would look into some counselling or group therapy of some kind.

 

[zombiesarepeaceful]

This is completely off topic but your title reminded me of the movie "the dewey cox story"...."it'll turn all your bad feelings into good feelings...you don't want none of this c-caine." and he replies, "give me some a' that shit!"

I can relate to ssri's lifting the depression, but not making you happy either. I was on ssri's like 4 yrs ago and refuse to take them again for that reason. I felt...off. Not like myself. While I wasn't as depressed, I wasn't me. Now I don't tell my doc that I'm depressed, I only get meds for adhd. How to conquer depression, I haven't the slightest fucking clue. Find the root of it I guess. Is it caused by your situation in life, or is it caused by chemicals in your brain, or what? I know mine is mostly situational cause of things I need thousands of dollars to fix. Work on changing what you know makes you depressed.

 

[Legerity]

I'm not sure that medication in itself will solve everything. If you find one that works well with you it may help alleviate some of the symptoms and could potentially make it easier for you to deal with your depression in other ways. But if you're getting disillusioned with medication then it may be helpful to attempt other approaches in conjunction with them.

I would agree with the suggestions for psychotherapy. Combining psychotherapy + medication has been shown to be more effective in the long-term than medication by itself.

 

[anterrabae]

Beating depression takes a lot of effort. Pills alone won't do it. They'll help get you there, but you have to make some effort as well, whether it's some sort of therapy, a change in lifestyle like eating differently and exercising. Getting out of your rut, traveling, or doing an activity you wouldn't normally do; something to change your perspective and outlook on life.

And it takes time, most certainly, you have to have patience with this. I'm still working on it myself, but I hope I'm moving in the right direction.

 

[attempt4]

It's difficult and im in the same boat.
I take Kratom for my anxiety/depression and it works amazingly well, with no side-effects.
But it just doesn't feel right having to take something to alleviate a mental problem. I feel I should be trying to tackle it head on....it's just I was born with insane anxiey and suffered for 16 years with it until I found Kratom.

 

[itsok]

I suggest a multipronged approach -- some kind of therapy (CBT, group, psycho, etc...), new social connections, activities, diet and vitamins - especially D3/sunlight and B complexes, and ketamine.

Did u see the post about ketamine as an effective antidepressant in this forum initially posted by theartofwar? I also added to that thread another very thorough research paper that goes into detail about that. Although I believe that it is best to not be dependent on a medication, at least with ketamine, the use isn't daily, but weekly to every 2 weeks, and it could be a temporary thing, like let's say for months or so. Bc according to the first article, it stated that ketamine actually repaired the brain that has been damaged by stress via synaptagenesis. So that looks promising to me.

 

[Dave]

Attempt4-- except the addiction thing

Mood elevation does not equal antidepressant, unfortunately.

 

[themdyaunome]

I used to see a psychologist every other week and honestly, it made me worse because I hated sharing my feelings with a random stranger. Im going to get back on therapy however when I see my psychiatrist in three weeks. I was on the xanax while taking the SSRI's I believe, or at least two of the three. I couldnt imagine living without my xanax, it helped with my depression, anxiety and minor bipolerism for more than a year now on its own, but I feel like it doesnt do the job it once did. Im going to ask about something with a longer duration such as klonopin because the xanax I have to dose more often now, and end up running out early at the end of the month. I suppose it doesnt help I was clean since last July, only taking suboxone to help me through the day, until around March.

I believe the main reason for my depression however, is I broke up with my girlfriend of three years last July, and finally felt I was over her until about Christmas time. Now I dream about her almost evefry night and think about her every day. Ive dated a few girls since and it just made me think more and more that I wont find someone that made me as happy and comfortable with myself as her. I know I will someday, but it feels pretty unrealistic at the moment. Thanks for the advice though, any more input and/or stories would be helpful. It's good just to hear other peoples stories/perspectives at times like these.

 

[Asclepius]

A break up after 3 years isnt easy. When depression is going on this can magnify negative feelings too; so bare in mind that this is probably contributing factor. Keep focusing on yourself man, good relationships can enhance us but whats really paramount is that we feel able and content in ourselves, you deserve this, girlfriend or not.

 

[themdyaunome]

Thanks man, Ive been slowly slowly realizing this. It doesnt help that I got back into my old drug habits, but Ive stopped again recently, hopefully for good. I start a new job on Tuesday and once I make some money will be able to see a drug counselor and my psychiatrist again. Only thing is Im going to be going through withdrawals during my first 2-3 weeks at my new job unless I can find some suboxone/subutex soon. Im not too worried though. Im just going with the flow of life and trying to think positively. It will all come together eventually...

 

[monstanoodle]

Really, really want to take the rest of my Diazepam and Codeine I have, but I'll find myself in a complete mess for the rest of those days until my next script.

Kaning a bottle of wine in an attempt to ignore it.... It's not going well, already had an extra day's woth of the meds, gone through the 7 Nitraz (5mg each) in two days. Could have taken them all at once without much effect.

Fucking Ethanol... You're a wanker and I hate you.

 

[themdyaunome]

Really, really want to take the rest of my Diazepam and Codeine I have, but I'll find myself in a complete mess for the rest of those days until my next script.

Kaning a bottle of wine in an attempt to ignore it.... It's not going well, already had an extra day's woth of the meds, gone through the 7 Nitraz (5mg each) in two days. Could have taken them all at once without much effect.

Yeah unfortunately that is the position I find myself in every month when it is almost time for my alprazolam refill. Im prescribed 4mg/day but often, usually when Im hurtin' without any opiates, I find myself taking more(or trading them). I then turn to alcohol when I have neither opiates nor benzos. This leaves me in the position I am in now, .5mg/day til I see my psych on Thursday. It's gonna be a long five days...