Mental Health Depression MEGA Thread - DepressionTalk + Over 100 Links of Info

[Jabberwocky]

Hi n3ophy7e,

I am hitting points with depression now that I don't know what else I can learn about it. In saying this I feel as if the biggest issue with people being depressed is acceptance, i.e. not accepting that your situation is like this or this event just happened like that. If something is accepted, something can be acted on otherwise the problem will manifest itself.....

Another thing as well, for most people who are depressed and are engaging in addiction, you are more or less over riding your good self. I have felt this a lot of times when I lose myself to the drink.....Then I hit a sober period and come to a big moment of clarity. I am thinking that perhaps a small form of split personality exists there, i.e. the addictor and non addictor or the non performer and the non performer?

 

[darkwing]

my first ever Bluelight post

I've had depression & anxiety on and off for over 10 years. Two years a go I stopped using heroin and finally came off methadone. I got really depressed or maybe there was just no buffer between it and me anymore.

What has really helped me was a set of rules I made for myself the first time I got depressed.

1. No more than 10 hours a day in bed (without a limit I'd spend all day there when I'm depressed).

2. Get out of the house for an hour a day (doesn't matter where).

3. Talk to at least six people a day (even "Can I have a pint of milk please" counts!).

There really simple because I need to keep things simple when I'm having a bad time. They needed to be (very) small goals I could reach. But they've worked well for me.

Darkwing.

 

[Romie1092]

Thanks for sharing your ideas noonoo and darkwing I always enjoy reading about ways people manage to help themselves with depression.

Well ive started a new medication last week called Moclobemide (sold as Aurorix, Manerix and Arima in Australia). Anyone been on this or know if its any good? I searched BL but didnt find much information except on how good it is to increase mushroom highs. So far things are looking better with the only side effect being the ocassional headache. Only one 150mg split into 2 daily and have to double it every 5 days until I hit 600mg daily. After like 1.5 years hopefully ive found the one.

 

[mukaki]

Thanks for sharing your ideas noonoo and darkwing I always enjoy reading about ways people manage to help themselves with depression.

Well ive started a new medication last week called Moclobemide (sold as Aurorix, Manerix and Arima in Australia). Anyone been on this or know if its any good? I searched BL but didnt find much information except on how good it is to increase mushroom highs. So far things are looking better with the only side effect being the ocassional headache. Only one 150mg split into 2 daily and have to double it every 5 days until I hit 600mg daily. After like 1.5 years hopefully ive found the one.

The most important thing about this drug, in case you don't know, is that it is a MAOi which means that most recreational drugs is strictly forbidden. Do very very thorough research before doing any drug.

It's a quite powerful drug so it might very well help with your depression.

Good luck

 

[Romie1092]

Thanks for the heads up about the drug intereactions. Just had a quick look in the anti d faq in the healthy living section and I noticed it said no opiates at all including codeine. Ive had 2 pretty bad headaches in the past 4 days so ive taken panafen plus(200mg ibupofen(spelling, 12.8mg codeine each pill) plus on both occasions with no side effects. Should it be okay to continue using panafen plus for headaches? Might be a problem when im on 600mg a day not to sure.

 

[mukaki]

Codeine and ibuprofene is probably safe, but some opiates are forbidden. I'm finding conflicted information, but ibuprofene is safe. As is Paracetamol. Perhaps taking some paracetamol and ibuprofene could help just as well?

 

[n3ophy7e]

Personally I find apap and ibup pretty useless by themselves.

apap and ibuprofen are known to potentiate each other so even if they're useless on their own (which I find as well) if you take them together you should get better results. This will cut out the codeine altogether, just to be on the safe side.
Having said that, you should never exceed 400mg ibuprofen and 1g apap per dose, and never take more than 1200mg of ibuprofen and 4g of apap per day.

 

[ocean]

bump

 

[Sweet P]

I've had to stop taking Effexor (venlafaxine) after only one week of being on it... it was starting to give me unbearable anxiety. So once again, I'm without an anti-depressant, which isn't good when you have borderline personality disorder and periods of major depression. I've been on fluoxetine, citalopram and bupropion without much success. Effexor may have improved my mood over time (my doc said it can take a month to start fully working), but I just couldn't handle the anxiety it was giving me. So that's yet another anti-depressant to cross off my list.

 

[equivocate]

I've recently come to terms with the fact that I'm battling depression.

One of the main things that's been bothering me is the excessive dreaming. Like most people suffering from depression, I have a hell of a struggle falling asleep. But when I finally do sleep, I'll wake up every half hour or so because of intensely vivid and disturbing dreams. I've always dreamt more than others, so I just assumed this was normal for me, but I came across some research today that shows sleep like this is a result of depression and causes a catch-22 that can prevent people dealing with their depression.

I found out that people suffering from depression tend to get very little of the type of sleep needed to actually rest the body. Instead they spend most of their sleeping hours in REM sleep, the part of sleep that takes all the excess emotion and works it out so your brain is clear and ready to deal with the next day.

Depressed people, however, tend to become very introverted (which I've been since I was a kid) and have far higher levels of pent up emotion and worry. The fact that depression stops you from being able to talk to people causes further introversion and an inability to work out the problems in waking hours. This means the brain gets stuck in REM sleep trying to work out this emotion and doesn't get chance to completely shut down into deep sleep.

Because of the excess dreaming, more energy is used in the brain. This, combined with the lack of deep sleep, is why we wake up so exhausted. This exhaustion makes people less able to deal with their problems and as a result, more REM sleep is needed. It can become a vicious circle.

Basically, I thought I'd post this in the hopes of hearing other people's experiences of dreams, and opinions of this theory, as I read that it's not particularly accepted in the medical world of people who think depression is purely a chemical imbalance.

 

[Jblazingphoenix100]

I'm depressed.

I haven't told many people about it...family of course know, they've had to deal with all my shit...

My mum's always been pretty depressed, but I guess I wasn't aware of it until I started to care about how they were doing - I tried not to for a long time. SHe went on medication when my parents split up...

Now I think about whether depression is hereditary genetically, or if it's a "nurture thing" - bit of both...whatever, it's there.

But I've put a brave face on too much, for too long....but not any more - I've been told that I'm worrying people more and more - I thought I was getting better, but the woman I'm seeing says she's worried about me, my friend Aimee just told me tonight she's worried about me, I know my parents are worried about me - when are they not it seems.

I don't want people to worry...

I also don't know exactly how to stay out of a rut - apart from not drinking depressants, doing exercise, getting as much daylight as possible, having decent balanced diet and sleep, and of course limiting my drug use to occasional - I don't want to go on medication, but the past few weeks are the first time I've actually considered it.

I REALLY don't want to go on medication - so now, I'm going to try my hardest to keep out of the rut - I'm so up and down though I just don't know what the hell's up with that... Why can't a good mood last?!?!

I just need to implement the things I KNOW are good for my mood. Hmm...calmer.

 

[SilverFeniks]

Next month I'll turn 26, and that means I've had serious depressive issues for half my life.
I've had nothing but abuse and ridicule from the medical establishment; despite being successful, happy (doesn't take much, less is more for me), clean from all illicit/Rx/OTC drugs (save my 1-3 nightly beers when I have the $) and a relatively healthy eater and distance runner, I've still not managed to shake suicidal ideations, manic depression, and an overwhelming desire to drown my problems in drugs I can't find.

I'll have insurance again in 2011, but it's the same HMO that wasted my time (or worse) many times in prior years.
I've already achieved all my life's goals long ago (well, I never really had any, but sure don't have any for the future). Not sure what motivation I can find to continue living in this state indefinately. The alternative sure isn't attractive, though, not while things are going so well.

So, major Catch-22 ... continue as-is until a merciful natural death, or set aside my extreme distrust/hatred of the medical/pharmaceutical establishment and take dangerous, mind-altering, non-enjoyable drugs?

Think I'll hold out for option 3, the rare illicits, always have been my favorite option

 

[drugssexandmusic]

I find that depressed people become very good at being depressed.

This is ignorant and unhelpful. You obviously have never experienced depression yourself. Or other mental health problems, unless you count the ones YOU probably induced by Methamphetamine, or maybe your just a nasty person!

 

[dilated_pupils]

Hey everyone, been a while since I posted let alone made this thread.

I wanted to 'check in' I guess so here's what's been going on with myself...

I've been taking a new bipolar medication (at least since the last time I posted on here) lamictal. I must admit it's helped me a lot, but it I miss even just one day I can sometimes feel it effect me a lot and I'll feel very down/depressed.

My anxiety is still not 100% handled, and since my tolerance to benzo's (now been on them for over 7 years) is so high even with the increase in my dosage of klonopin I've not seen any noticeable difference in my anxiety/OCD issues. If anyone has any recommendations for anxiety/OCD it'd be greatly appreciated.

I've now been clean from opiates for over 2 years (2 years this past August) although I did attempt to get high 2 times or so I never actually did so I look past those times and continue with my sobriety and I very much enjoy it - however trying to get off suboxone is effecting my mood greatly. I'm down to taking 2mgs a day; I've been on Suboxone the whole time I've been clean so it's been over 2yrs now and it's time to get the hell of this crap but it isn't easy.

Obviously, like all of you, I'd prefer not to have to take any medication(s) but for now I do. I hope to get off what I can and eventually be medication free, but we'll have to see what happens.

Anyway, I hope you're all doing well; I know this is TDS (always will be my home on BL ) so this is where we all share our issues/addictions and such, but remember there is always hope and when you share your problems you're on your way to recovery - the first step is always admitting you have a problem to begin with

Peace, Love & Light to you all!

-dp

 

[paranoid android]

A thread back from the dead

Okay i went to see my psychiatrist the other day and told her about how bad i have felt lately. To no surprise on my part she was her usual uncaring self as she simply does not give a flying fuck. I told her about the long manic episodes i have been getting as well as the hypomania, major depression and worst of all mixed states which are torture. I also told her that i have been having a bitch of a time sleeping. I also showed her the burn mark on my arm from the red hot lighter i put out on my arm last week and she hardly glanced at it

So what does she do? She kept me on the same lamotrigine dose but just gave me 1mg of risperidone to take everyday instead of the seroquel. She refused to up my lamotrigine dose because she does not change 2 meds at a time 8) . She was also nice enough to give me a whopping 10 zopiclone pills for sleep. Yeah 10 lousey sleeping pills thanks doc

So now im on 300mg's of wellbutrin a day, 75mg's of lamotrigine, 1mg of risperidone, 6mg's of clonazepam and i also now take 100mg's of seroquel at night to help me sleep and calm me down more. I know mixing anti-psychotics isint the best idea but the risperdal does not help me sleep at all. Hopefully i won't run into trouble mixing the 2. I also take L-tyrosine sometimes to boost the effects of the bupropion i am on but i have to be reallly careful with this as it can make me too high strung and can cause mania.

I am more then abit pissed at my shrink due to her not giving a fuck. At this point i would try anything really because anything is better then feeling like your going crazy due to mania. This is not even mentioning all the trouble it fucking causes when you do stupid shit while manic. So i have to take my mental health into my own hands it seems because noone else gives a fuck.

 

[Regenesis2]

To Sweet Pea: I've tried all sorts of ADs except MAOIs. The SSRI's were the worst for me and could never get through them for more than a few days. The TCAs and Trazodone stuff was more tolerable but never helped my feelings.
I don't beleive there is such a thing as an antidepressant. Shitty things happened in my life and on top of that I made bad descisions to really fuck shit up.
Although I don't believe that a drug can cause happiness, I am aware of certain drugs that can make you very unhappy like benzos, Z-drugs, and excessive alcohol. Those dumbfuck chemists managed to create dysphoria in a pill form and push it on people while benign stuff like cannabis is a crime. Smoking herb was the only thing that ever worked until I went into benzo withdrawal plus a stress overload.
I would really consider the nutritional and exercise method, just light exercise, I know that I feel too shitty to really do much and sleep terribly at that anymore.
Also try 5htp or St. Johns wort, or maybe theanine. I don't know if those helped me any, unlike psych pharms they never hurt me.
And watch out, these psycho-doctors will prescribe anti-psychotics for anything, I suggest not taking them for anxiety or depression. Many sources say Borderline isn't treatable with meds and I doubt it is purely biological in origin either.

 

[stonerfromohio]

I have depression right now, and major anxiety. I just feel unhappy, unsatisfied, hopeless. Sometimes I just have a heavy cloud over me, other times its prickly feelings in my body, other times its just total lethargy, when im with people im just always nervous and fearful. I used to be a stoner, and psychedelic user (LSD, mushrooms, ecstacy, salvia, 2cb, dxm once or twice) with the occasional coc/opiate/alcohol but ive been pretty much sober for a year or two besides drinking a few times and smoking 3 or 4 times in that two year period. So I dont think its drug related because I have had pretty solid abstinenance from drugs.

For a while I was going to yoga and it was helping a lot but since ive moved in with my aunt I havent been able to do it, i turn towards food and sex but it never really brings me out of it. I cant go through my days like this, im nervous to get a job because I am just so down and nervous that being around people is not pleasant at all. I dont want to be put on anti-depressents or anti-anxiety medication and be just zombified, but I need some help. I dont have any friends anymore, I dont have very good relationships with any family, I have a baby and child support is about to start. I dropped out of school I was going for psychology. I dont want to tell a sob story but I dont know where to turn to and I found this thread... any recommendations or whatever are welcomed...

I started going to this Tai Chi and Qi gong place, I lift regularly and have been trying to run on occasion... you would think all that and being a yoga instructor would help but I am always just in this darkness... ive tried chanting, meditation, buddhism... retreats, it always returns.. maybe its my thought patterns, or I did too many drugs I dont know..

 

[n3ophy7e]

Hi stoner, sorry to hear you're struggling with this hun. When did your depression start? You mentioned you've had a baby, do you think there might be a correlation between the birth and your depression? Post-natal depression is more common than people might think and there is no shame in experiencing it.

It could also be from your previous drug use/abuse, but rather than it being a direct cause, it could've just triggered some depression in you that was dormant anyway. Does any depression or anxiety run in either side of your family?

Have you ever spoken to anyone else about how you're feeling, perhaps a family member? Even just talking about it can really help clear your mind sometimes. Have you ever had any counselling/therapy? If not, I suggest you look in to it, just to see what options are available in your local area. Counselling has really helped me in the past so I'm a firm believer that it can help a lot with depression in particular.

Keep us updated with how you're going hun, take care

 

[ocean]

bump

 

[dilated_pupils]

Just thought I'd update a bit here since I haven't posted in this thread for a while.

I've been doing good depression-wise for a while now. I've lowered my dosages on all my meds and have been doing great, and I hope to eventually be medication free -- but for now I'm going to have to stick with the lamictal for my bipolar, the klonopin for my anxiety, and the suboxone (which I'm currently still trying to kick).

Basically I've just worked on myself, made sure I put myself as priority number 1, and then my life became better. Yes I still have days where I feel like complete shit, but the thing is I deal with it much more carefully now rather than sit and mope about feeling hopeless.

I hope you all are doing well

-dp