Depression: cortisol damage vs. drug induced damage

[mb-909]

I have been posting a few posts with the struggles suffering from my depression (some of them in my diluted anxiety induced state). Depression itself leads to damage to the hippocampus by high cortisol levels I read, at least in mice... My question is if taking an antidepressant would be less damaging than staying sober in a high stressing environment? The problem I am considering right now is that everything I am going to achieve on medication will be remembered "unconsciously" by the processes of memory and learning resulting in a drop off after discontinuing my "medication". Right now the only psychotrope substance I am taking besides milk and sugar is psilocybin with 2-3 weeks spacing inbetween. Studying psychology, while highly interesting, stresses me out a lot, because I am actually studying (using the brain) for the first time in my life. I suppose it would be a lot easier to take some happy pills to get better... The studies I read questioned the effectiveness of antidepressants on the other side... The last thing I want is getting medicated, getting "addicted" (every substance changing your biochemistry for the long run is therefor going to change the biochemical system as part of adaption => SSRI withdrawal syndrome) and pulling the trigger while fighting the withdrawal.

On note: It was a bad idea to wait so long searching for help and it will probably hunt me down the rest of my life... My short term memory seemed to be standard after testing it in my classes, but I still feel very mentally numbed (1 year break from MDMA - first antidepressant- and neuroleptics). If I could improve my memory and thinking it would be great.

So, is it healthier to take medications or to keep fighting "sober"? (I am not really deep into psychology quiet yet to determine what's best in the long run)

 

[Cotcha Yankinov]

Stress is very harmful to the growth of the brain, if it is severe and chronic enough, it inhibits neurogenesis (the growth of new brain cells). On that note, cardio (I highly recommend 20-30 minutes 3-4 times a week) has been shown to increase neurogenesis of serotonin (which is theorized to help people suffering from residual effects of MDMA), but cardio has countless other brain benefits especially against depression.

If a medication does lower stress a lot for you then I think it is a good thing for your brain as long as it is not a brain shrinking Benzo. SSRIs do increase neurogenesis (with chronic treatment I believe) and you WILL keep these brain cells after you stop medication. Especially if you are learning and using your brain! The brain is like a muscle in that manner.

SSRIs don't work for every one though, prior MDMA users in my experience can have problems with them. In two Irish studies SSRIs were shown to be not very effective (against anxiety I believe??) after chronic MDMA use. You definitely don't want to use them if you don't sleep well on them though. Most of your new brain cells are made in your sleep, where your memories are formed as well.

Cardio is a safe bet for fighting the effects of stress while promoting brain growth at the same time.

 

[mb-909]

Well I hope my brain would have adapted to the stress... At the age of 14 I was too young to understand that help might indeed help, that medication might help me. Back then I didn't believe in happy pills or simply said that somebody can change by taking them. Nothing is free and in the end it is you, who has to change your perspective, your way of thinking, adapting to a world being so foreign to you and inefficient... At 22, I hope that staying sober for the most of the time didn't ruin my mental health. It would be ironic if I would have done more damage to myself than by doing drugs...

I strongly consider medications now, probably tianeptine as it showed to work quiet quickly and well. Thanks for your feed back.