I think everyone has or should have an alter-ego. Good/bad, mine is ''Shady'', the dark side of Jupiter's moons. I don't wanna open up like this but hopefully it will help someone, someone who doesn't know themselves yet. I had a bad childhood, not unique but very bad, my mom drugged me everyday, she tortured me, she will have me locked in a cage in the basement sometimes, suffocating environments, so on. I had to bare at a very young age some things that some people couldn't bare even full grown-up. She would have sex with me, I.. I, fuck, okay. She had sex with me but I would refuse her and I will just go hide somewhere, my neighbors didn't like me or my family even though I didn't had any guilt but I couldn't get help from anyone, she would lock the doors, keep me inside. By the age of 13 I left the house. I took my birth certificate with myself, a backpack with basic needs and started a life of my own, I didn't think I would survive but I did, streets were and still are hard, don't wish anyone to be there. I've met few girls, their personality didn't intrigue me so I waited for the right one, at 18 I've met my life partner which today I have a family with, kids, mansion, somewhere remoted, don't like the city noise that much + nature it's more logical. Not going too much into, I will end with this.. What i've said above, those are unimportant things, my childhood was worst than that. I don't like being too personal with strangers, bottom line will be that if I would take all my life experiences and boil down into a hourglass, the other side would be empty. That because I learned to control my dark side, I've lost friendships as maybe others did, I would blame ''Shady'' for everything that I hated, would you consider this approach immature? No, I would consider this approach somehow as a ''rope to hang on'' while I try to figure out what exactly's going on and how to fix it, Shady did a lot of bad things but also good things. You can't love if you don't know hate, you can't hate if you don't know love. If anyone has any Q about anything and how to deal with something, please ask. Don't bottle all in, you will be just a mutt thinks of it as a scrambled black dot, you don't have to be like that. Help me so I can help you.