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Debt / Money Problems

stAr shAdow nEt

stAr shAdow nEt

Bluelighter
Joined
Feb 26, 2004
Messages
450
Location
A Cheap Motel In The Bad Part Of Town
Okay. So here goes. I have been having ALOT of trouble with money lately. Basically, my expenses outweigh my income. Out of my own irresponsibility i have gotten myself into 1,200 dollars worth of credit card debt; along with about almost 3,000 dollars worth of rent that i owe. I have a car payment that is 250 a month. My rent is 550 a month. I make about 1,400 a month from my job.

I really dont know what to do. And its really starting to depress me. I never have any cash in my wallet. I mean, payday and the few days after it feel good, when i can "treat" myself to buying a few things that i want, along with groceries and whatnot. But right before payday i always run out of money and have to borrow from friends so i can buy food and gas. It makes me feel like im a bum.

I tried to make a budget once but it was too much of a pain in the ass to keep track of, plus i could never stick to it. I mean, its not like im up in the mall everyday buying shit i dont need or something.

So what can i do? Somethings gotta give here. Anybody else been in a situation like this? How did you get through it and out of debt? Please help any advice is much appriciated.
 
stAr shAdow nEt said:
I never have any cash in my wallet. I mean, payday and the few days after it feel good, when i can "treat" myself to buying a few things that i want, along with groceries and whatnot. But right before payday i always run out of money and have to borrow from friends so i can buy food and gas. It makes me feel like im a bum.
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There's part of your problem. Sure you THINK you have money to spare to treat yourself to things, since you just got your paycheck, but obviously you DON'T have money to treat yourself to non-essential items (essential items being food/gas/personal products), or you wouldn't run out of money by your next paycheck.

Sit down and figure out your monthly expenses. You have your rent and your car payment, but you also need to figure out how much you typically spend per week on groceries, gas, necessary personal items (like shampoo, soap, et) and household things (laundry detergent, cleansers), and any other bills. Figure that out, then see how much you'd have leftover for "extras." If you feel you MUST treat yourself to things (and of course you WANT to treat yourself to things) then limit that to once a month, at the end of the month, AFTER you pay all your bills, and if you have anything leftover.

Or get a second job to supplement your income til you are more financially stable.

Most financial problems do not have easy solutions. And your problems won't magically disappear and you can't simply say "budgets don't work for me"... or else you will be in debt forever.

I was in major debt a few years ago (its a long complicated story that I won't get into) and it got so bad that I had to take drastic measures. That meant temporarily moving in with my father, and also filing bankruptcy (my debts were way too much for me to ever conceivably pay off in SEVERAL years, so bankruptcy was my only option). It also meant limiting my spending and getting a high paying, stable job.

Several months later I was back on my feet and now I'm living by myself again in a nice place, and I am financially stable and everything is great. But believe me, I suffered through a lot and overcame a lot to be where I am today. You have to work for it.
 
Agree. If you can't keep to a budget, you will be stuck in a pattern of increasing debt for the rest of your life. I'm not exaggerating - it is very, very common.

Here's what I'd do if I were you:
1. Sell the car and/or
2. Get a second job
3. Cut up the credit card and set up a direct debit to send $100-200 a month to it.
4. Make sure your rent is paid FIRST each month, before you pay anything else. I can't believe your landlord let you get five months behind on rent! My ass would be on the street by now.
 
Well, at this point, all I can say is that the others have spelled everything out very clearly. I would reinforce the idea of getting a second job, even if it is only for 6 months or so - it can help you get out of debt not only with the additional income but by occupying a lot of your time you are currently spending by a) feeling depressed/powerless or b) 'treating' yourself....neither of which is helping correct the situation.

Don't give up, and don't despair - it may seem overwhelming, but even this can be fixed. Like others, I've been climbing out of debt for several years (I peaked at about $30k in credit cards, but am within $10k now...and may be debt free by the end of this year - certainly by the middle of next year).

But again, each of the suggestions above, even if it seems so damn hard or drastic, is worth considering seriously. If you want to get out of the hard place you've put yourself in, it's going to take some hard work to correct. And the sooner you start, the sooner it will stop weighing on you so heavily.
 
aunty establishment said:
3. Cut up the credit card and set up a direct debit to send $100-200 a month to it.
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I can't believe I forgot to say that!!! CUT THOSE CARDS UP!!!! Maybe leave one (your lowest interest rate) for emergencies (as in you have no money and you need gas to get to work, or you have no food). Cutting up your credit cards is a huge relief, because then you know you can't pile on more debt to them.
 
First, i cant sell my car, i need it to get to work everyday. That isnt an option. Second, i already work a FULL TIME job, so getting a second job really doesnt appeal to me. Yeah i could get a second job and then i can work 18 hours a day and get maybe like 4 hours of sleep everyday, what a great idea! What a wonderful life that would be.

Third, i only have one credit card. I do have a Debit card, but i never use it as my bank account is pretty much always empty.

My landloard now wants half of the rent i owe by the end of this month. So basically im fucked. I cant move back home as there is no room there for all of my shit plus i dont think my parents would even consider it. And i have a cat that i cant take with me to my parents house, and i really dont want to get rid of the cat.

Basically im screwed. Maybe ill just sell everything i own and sleep in my car in the parking lot at work. That sounds great. Espically when its 100+ degrees outside everyday here in California.

Or maybe i should just QUIT life all together as it just isnt working out.............
 
oh honey, your problems seem so small compared to mine lol. im just chillin, still, hell, im young! but eventually i'll have everything figured out.

im 10+ grand in debt (havent made a single CC payment since march) and have dealt with collectors calling everyday, multiple times a day. i have yet to return any of their calls or answer any of their calls :( i dont know what to say! my dad said to hold off and figure out everything--- tell them that i'll pay what i charged(or part, depending on the situation) but cannot pay any of the fees or finance charges OR i'll have to file bankruptcy--- so basically say this is what i can do or i'm fucking you over! (companies dont like when you file for bankruptcy because then they get stuck with the charges, and ive got 10gs stacked uo at least)

you can try that route with your CC plus PLEASE cut it up NOW. now now now. borrowing money from a friend is much better than charging something, trust me.

and good luck!!!!!!!!!
 
faithfully dangerous said:
tell them that i'll pay what i charged(or part, depending on the situation) but cannot pay any of the fees or finance charges OR i'll have to file bankruptcy--- so basically say this is what i can do or i'm fucking you over! (companies dont like when you file for bankruptcy because then they get stuck with the charges, and ive got 10gs stacked uo at least)
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EXCELLENT PLAN! :D

In order to get the collection calls to stop, I had to inform all the companies I owed debt to (mostly credit cards but other stuff too) that I was filing bankruptcy. At which point they offer you TONS of offers of "oh ok well you owe $1,000 but just pay us $400 and we'll call it even" and things to that effect. Because yes, as you said, when you file bankruptcy, they get totally fucked and don't see a dime of money to pay back everything you charged on your cards. Why wait though? Why not just tell them right now that you're in over your head and seriously considering bankruptcy unless they can work with you to lower your payments. Putting it off will not benefit you in any way. Right now you're causing yourself unnecessary stress and worry about all the money you owe and can't pay. The sooner you take care of it, the better you will feel. I'm a huge procrastinator, and I put myself through so much hell for so long until finally doing something about it.
 
stAr shAdow nEt said:
Or maybe i should just QUIT life all together as it just isnt working out.............
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Don't say something like that!!!! :( If you really are feeling hopeless then please feel free to PM me and I'll do what I can to help you see that you CAN get through this.

I've said it a few times already, but I've been there. And trust me, there was a time that I felt EVERYTHING was hopeless and I just couldn't do it. When I was in debt over my head I was also jobless because I was a fucking meth addict who put my habit above everything else. I wasn't ever in the mental state to do anything productive let alone work or fix my problems or anything. Plus I'm clinically depressed, so basically, I was at rock bottom.

But saying you're going to "quit life altogether" is NOT the answer. Not at all.
 
It looks like your expenses are only a little bit more than half of what you make. You need to sit down and write out a budget. Write down how much you need for gas, basic food supplies and other bills like phone and power. The amount you have left take about $50 off of that and take that and pay your credit cards and landlord. Figure out how much you will pay to each and tell your landlord this (ie: I will pay you the $550 plus another $300 a month in order to fully pay you back in 10 months). Show him the budget if you must. Believe me, he wants that money back so he may let you stay if you can show him you worked it out so you can pay him.

Don't run away from this. You can probably get out of debt in a year if you make the effort so that really isn't that bad. Only you can make yourself do this though.
 
stAr shAdow nEt said:
First, i cant sell my car, i need it to get to work everyday. That isnt an option. Second, i already work a FULL TIME job, so getting a second job really doesnt appeal to me. Yeah i could get a second job and then i can work 18 hours a day and get maybe like 4 hours of sleep everyday, what a great idea! What a wonderful life that would be.

Third, i only have one credit card. I do have a Debit card, but i never use it as my bank account is pretty much always empty.

My landloard now wants half of the rent i owe by the end of this month. So basically im fucked. I cant move back home as there is no room there for all of my shit plus i dont think my parents would even consider it. And i have a cat that i cant take with me to my parents house, and i really dont want to get rid of the cat.

Basically im screwed. Maybe ill just sell everything i own and sleep in my car in the parking lot at work. That sounds great. Espically when its 100+ degrees outside everyday here in California.

Or maybe i should just QUIT life all together as it just isnt working out.............
Click to expand...

You know what this sounds like to me? It sounds like "I want to get out of debt without making any lifestyle changes or effort of my own". You need to stop saying "I can't" and start looking at what you can do. Sorry, but pity parties never garner much sympathy from me. Once you stop putting everything into the too hard basket, then you'll have a chance to see your situation improve.
 
aunty establishment said:
You know what this sounds like to me? It sounds like "I want to get out of debt without making any lifestyle changes or effort of my own". You need to stop saying "I can't" and start looking at what you can do. Sorry, but pity parties never garner much sympathy from me. Once you stop putting everything into the too hard basket, then you'll have a chance to see your situation improve.
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SCREW YOU
 
stAr shAdow nEt said:
That isnt an option. Second, i already work a FULL TIME job, so getting a second job really doesnt appeal to me. Yeah i could get a second job and then i can work 18 hours a day and get maybe like 4 hours of sleep everyday, what a great idea! What a wonderful life that would be.
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thats exactly what I'm doing right now. its not about what is appealing to you, its about doing what has to be done to make a change in your life.

due to work load, my full time job has been requiring 50-60hrs a week from me for the last couple weeks and my part time is another 16hrs on the weekend. on fridays I work from 9am till 2am between the two jobs.

I don't have any time for my friends, quality time with my gf is sleeping for a few hours before I go back to work, and my cat must think I'm some random guy who stops by to feed her once in a while.

but, I'm going to pay off $9,000 of credit card debt in a year.

so create a budget, work out a deal with your landlord and creditors and stick to the plan. its not as bad as you think. as aunty said, quitcher bitching, put your head down and get through this.

edit to add: our situations are surprisingly similar, 'cept my take home pay is 200 less than yours. my car payment with insurance is about the same and my house payment is 50 bucks more.

not trivializing your money issues here, just saying if I can do it, so can you.
 
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Fuck that i guess life is just ALL ABOUT MONEY AND NOTHING ELSE. Seems like we all just work to make SOME OTHER MOTHERFUCKER rich who has never had to work a day in their life. What a fucking joke. Life really is a joke a swear. I hate this shit. There is no way out. I might as well be a fucking slave picking cotton or something, at least they didnt have to worry about paying the rent or credit card debt. If i had a gun right now, id kill everyone around me and then myself and die laughing.
 
lol, sorry star shadow... but aunty's right :-/

GET AHEAD NOW before you're in my position... i was once there. you need to gain control.
 
fuck it i dont care about control theres no point to caring about debt anyway, im never going to have any money to do anything i want, so why worry about it? Im just going to work my ass off everyday for the rest of my life so EVERYBODY ELSE in the world can enjoy themselves. So why should i even care about money? Give me a good reason somebody cause id love to hear it.
 
stAr shAdow nEt said:
Fuck that i guess life is just ALL ABOUT MONEY AND NOTHING ELSE. Seems like we all just work to make SOME OTHER MOTHERFUCKER rich who has never had to work a day in their life. What a fucking joke. Life really is a joke a swear. I hate this shit. There is no way out. I might as well be a fucking slave picking cotton or something, at least they didnt have to worry about paying the rent or credit card debt. If i had a gun right now, id kill everyone around me and then myself and die laughing.
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thats quite the go-getter attitude to have.

seriously. write your must pay expenses down.

write your income down.

if you have anything left over, the world is your oyster.

if you don't have anything left, get another job. work until you have something left. then go buy some shit for yourself, you've earned it. :)
 
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