Beelzebub said:
Entropy's Bitch - Poor little thing. Entropy MUST increase, and you can't control a single damn thing. Talk about a complete neuter. So you go on increasing, and in the meantime, I'll go on corrupting the innocent, tempting the righteous, and just generally raising hell in a whole lot of wonderful ways.
My dear, sad, little Beelzebub, that's terribly weak logic on your part. I'd expect the same kind of response out of the monkeys you try to corrupt. Those apes are truly beginning to rot your mind like Gobstoppers do teeth.
You think you wound my pride by calling me a "neuter?" Try it on sexual beings that need to exchange genetic material to continue their line; perhaps they'll take offense. Of COURSE I'm a neuter, you idiot. Perhaps you meant to say, "impotent." But probably not since I'd
expect you to be a master of vocabulary/vernacular/semantics in order to trick those nearly hairless monkeys with your little "contracts."
I'll only go on increasing? No, I am a constant force, a perfect rate. I neither increase nor decrease. I only
seem to increase to the subjective (and therefore flawed) observer as a system tries in vain to blunt my process; but in reality I'm kinda like Rolling Rock--"same as it ever was." (And by the way, being Entropy's Bitch, I don't have to worry about copyright or trademark enfringement. I can keep litigation tied up apellate court by filing motion after motion until everybody dies. It's a neat trick.)
And I don't wish to
control anything...especially nothing on so small a scale as you endeavor to. I wouldn't want to sully my hands by "insidiously" (HA!) attempting to craft the direction of such a flawed species as humanity. My job (and hobby...I really do love it so
) is to cause everything to crumble into nothingness, chaos, insanity. I care not for the petty desires in which you deal.
Temptation ain't my bag, yo. But tempting is hardly difficult work. Have you ever seen Stasis pour on the peer pressure when trying to get some prude to try out a new drug? They crumble in seconds. It's a pleasure to behold. Every few centuries you can pull off a similar feat, but you typically wander up to weak-willed, wretched sots begging on the streets, desiring deliverance from their perceived poverty, and offer to exchange their soul for the fortune of King Solomon. Oooh, *very* tricky work, there. Pardon me while I try to equal you by wiping my ass.
You should really look into some psychoanalysis for that over-active id of yours...most mature people/entities get a little control over it by the time they hit puberty. Time to grow up, kiddo. Maybe even wear big-boy pants.
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God said:
I tire of you trying to take credit for a system that I created.
Trust me God, I'd NEVER take credit for that colossal cluster fuck of yours. I still can't believe you'd wish to associate with those cretinous, chest-thumping, greedy, spiteful, small-minded monkeys. I mean come ON...some of them still laugh at their body's expulsion of methane, for God's/your sake! And have you SEEN what's showing on cable TV these days? Horrid stuff.
So worry not, God, the system is yours. I will NEVER claim it as mine, as I've got a reputation for integrity I have to uphold. It's all I can do not to laugh contemptuously and condescendingly at you whenever I look in on those idiots and their exploits. I'd be REALLY proud if I were you...as proud as your creations are when they take a sizable shit. Kudos to you, daddio.
Regardless, create all you want for as long as you want--6 days, 6 millennia, I really don't mind--I've got all the time in your imagination to wait, plus infinitely more. I don't die, I merely grind everything into dust, metaphorically speaking. So while you spend eons trying to prop up your "wonderous" universe from collapse, I will gobble it up bit by bit when you aren't looking. But you should thank me, as it gives you new building blocks with which to play. I know how little kids dig their blocks.
You know what's funny? I won't even have to put forth any effort to do ANY of it. It just comes naturally. And I
know you don't want to get into a battle of stamina, since you could only last for 6 days before you had to take a rest the
last time. You never thought to pace yourself, dood. Even monkey marathon runners know THAT. Tisk, tisk.
You may be infinitely powerful (in your own meglomaniacal, delusional mind), but I am infinitely patient; I'm the irresistable force you only have wet dreams of becoming.
See you when you're dead, Fred.
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Existence checks in, but it doesn't check out.
[This message has been edited by Entropy's Bitch (edited 23 October 2000).]
