cj
Bluelight Crew
I left that shit up on my blog but like what I really need is some advice on how to deal with some of the more disturbing aspects of PTSD. I mean as much as I like eating benzos and god knows I do know its not really helping me keep my life together anymore. I feel like I am ripping apart at the fucking seams. I tell people things I regret. I cut myself really bad last night to the point where I probably need stitches. But its in such an obviously self inflicted way that I cant go to a doctor. I hate to be dramatic but I have real doubts if I can keep this up. I wanted a life of less drug use for my family but it seems like sobriety is tearing my mind apart. Like I just cant cope with real life. I'm in therapy but its just talk you know? Like is there any other stuff that works? My main problem right now is the flashbacks. They are getting very intense.
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