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Dating someone who doesn't do drugs? Possible?

shady4091

shady4091

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This is more specifically about weed but I thought I'd broaden it up to include anything. Have any of you been in a long term relationship (not secretively, or behind their back mind you) being a drug user with someone who doesn't do drugs and not had the relationship end because of it, directly or indirectly?

I'm talking about the kind of people who are okay with certain drugs but don't do them themselves.

In my personal experience, I dated a girl who didn't really smoke weed but she knew I was a big stoner and said she was fine with it. At first it was all good, and she would even smoke up with me sometimes (to humor me I guess) but that didn't last long. Eventually she started to ask questions like "do you really have to do that every day?", or "why do you need that?". And a little while later, inevitably, we broke up because of it.

I've heard a lot of my friends say the same thing and the general consensus is: If a girl/guy who doesn't smoke pot says she's okay with you smoking pot, she/he isn't.

Agree? Disagree?
 
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Definitely possible. My husband smoked tons of pot--shit, he even grew it--and I just didn't. And it obviously didn't bother me that he did.

But, maybe it was possible because I do other drugs, so it wasn't like I was all straight disapproving of him smoking pot. I do drugs myself, just pot isn't one of them. So it just meant more for my husband.

I too have been thinking about this though, since I just started talking to his awesome guy who I really like, but he doesn't get high...I'm not really sure where I wanna go with this, what he's gonna think, and if he disapproves would I be willing to stop getting high? I mean I've been in love before, I've been high too, and love is far superior when it comes down to it...I think I would give up getting high if it was a seriously gonna be an issue in the relationship. But of course this thing is way too new to be saying "love" or anything, so I've been thinking a lot about what I should do...
 
Yeah, that's a little bit different, the fact that you do other drugs. But kudos for keeping an open mind! :)

It's true if you really love someone, you should be able to give up anything and everything for them but on the other hand, if they love you they should be able to accept you completely for who you are, everything included. Comes down to the whole, is it wrong to try and change someone kinda thing.
 
I use to date a girl that hated the fact that I did drugs but tolerated it because she had no choice, I wasnt gonna quit smoking weed back in the day. She would also hate the fact that I was high some times during sex, haha!

The girl im with now enjoys opiates & what not like me so everything is really cool. Can it be done if one person doesnt do it, um......I believe it can but it can put a strain in the relationship. I mean, if you're shooting heroin & she has to give you money for your habit (any habit for that matter, not just heroin) & she doesnt do drugs, I dont know how in the world that relationship would work out.
 
My first girlfriend absolutely hated every drug, but loved alcohol.

First time I did ecstasy, she practically lost it. Now I look back, and laugh.

No I wouldn't go into a relationship with that narrow minded of a person, but at the same time I would not date a drug addict.
 
I really don't think I could date someone who didn't at least smoke pot or drink alcohol. I am glad, however, that my girlfriend and I don't both have oxy habits... we'd probably end up homeless :\ She doesn't even like opiates/opioids except for the occasional Tylenol with Codeine for her back pain. She loves E, however, although it's not very common in my circle.

I guess it would be hard to date someone completely sober because drugs are frankly quite a big part of my life at the moment. And, honestly, sex while on drugs is awesome too. Sooooo... yeah. No. It's not possible for me. Maybe for others... but I doubt it.
 
I think there ARE people out there who truthfully wouldn't care about their partners drug use even if they didn't do any drugs themselves, but they are rare, unfortunately. And yeah, it's also a question of whether or not you would even WANT to date someone who doesn't do drugs. I love getting high with my girlfriend, absolutely. Someone who didn't do drugs would not really appeal to me either anymore because yes, weed at least is a pretty big part of my life so if I don't have someone who shares that with me it would not work.
 
It depends if they just don't do them, or are against them.

My current partner doesn't do drugs because he just doesn't have the desire to - ethically, he has nothing against them, and he knows I do them, so our relationship isn't affected in the slightest by it. If he actually had a problem with drug use morally though, that's a deal-breaker for me.
 
It's very possible. I'm just about to get back into a relationship with a women I have already had a long term relationship with, and she doesn't use any drugs. Hasn't even tried weed ONCE! She respects me and my choice.

I think it helps that her parents are heavy weed smokers though, so she's grown up with it her entire life.

When it comes to other drugs she sometimes gets pissed, mostly when I do them around her, but when its on my own time she doesn't care.

As long as the person you are dating doesn't have something against weed, or drugs, then it shouldn't be a problem.
 
No I wouldn't go into a relationship with that narrow minded of a person, but at the same time I would not date a drug addict.
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Amen to that Renz.
That pretty much sums up how i see it ha,
 
ahint said:
It depends if they just don't do them, or are against them.

My current partner doesn't do drugs because he just doesn't have the desire to - ethically, he has nothing against them, and he knows I do them, so our relationship isn't affected in the slightest by it. If he actually had a problem with drug use morally though, that's a deal-breaker for me.
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Perfect example of the possibility. How long have you been dating if you don't mind me asking?

And then there are the people who don't mind getting high with you and are fine with drugs but don't like it when you're off getting high with other people without them haha.
 
shady4091 said:
Perfect example of the possibility. How long have you been dating if you don't mind me asking?
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6-7ish months now. Not exactly long-term, but long enough to know drugs aren't a problem in the relationship. :)
 
I couldn't do it, not right now, not when you're blowing as much dope as I am right now.

In the words of the great Red Cafe, "I'm a boss, so I need a boss chick."

Except, you know, instead of boss, it's more like full-time heroin enthusiast. :\
 
It's possible. Unfortunately, every time I've tried it, the guy decides he wants to do what I'm doing, can't hang, and loses his shit. :(
But for pot, specifically, my dad has smokes tough for over 40 years. My mom doesn't smoke at all, and theyve been happily married for 34 of those years.
 
verso said:
I couldn't do it, not right now, not when you're blowing as much dope as I am right now.

In the words of the great Red Cafe, "I'm a boss, so I need a boss chick."

Except, you know, instead of boss, it's more like full-time heroin enthusiast. :\
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Hahahaha, I feel you! Tryin to change that, though, open up my possibilities a little more!
 
Renz Envy said:
My first girlfriend absolutely hated every drug, but loved alcohol.

First time I did ecstasy, she practically lost it. Now I look back, and laugh.

No I wouldn't go into a relationship with that narrow minded of a person, but at the same time I would not date a drug addict.
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^My sentiments EXACTLY!
 
Why do so many people think that just because someone doesn't do drugs that they're automatically narrow minded? That's a pretty lame stereotype I think. I have friends who don't do drugs and they're just as good of friends as those who do drugs. They're always cool about it and never pass judgment or anything. They're far from narrow minded...
 
shady4091 said:
Why do so many people think that just because someone doesn't do drugs that they're automatically narrow minded? That's a pretty lame stereotype I think. I have friends who don't do drugs and they're just as good of friends as those who do drugs. They're always cool about it and never pass judgment or anything. They're far from narrow minded...
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That's a good point, but I think what Renz means is that his ex-girlfriend looked down on his taking a substance other than her own preferred substance, alcohol; and that is pretty narrow minded. I would have to laugh at someone like that also, someone drinking and getting drunk and looking down at me for blowing down lines of dope.

"I'm going to become an addict? Well you're going to become an alcoholic, so go fuck your mother..." =D
 
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