I like talking to people and knowing we gel and have things in common before meeting especially cos guys (sorry, generalisation) always want to have sex right away but apart from like not finding anyone with anything in common with me or sleazy guys or guys that came on too strong I didn’t have as bad of an experience as the above poster.
Same here, as a guy. I too like to know a bit with whom I am dealing with before coming so close, which is difficult in another way as - also generalisation - girls tend to decide pretty quick who comes in question as a long time, short time partner or just as a friend and I usually get sorted in the last category. Had some exceptions, the rare case that somebody was physically attracted to me. Guess this is what you girls experience over and over, and yeah unless big coincidence then you're left with little in common which for me isn't what I am seeking for.
Probably these swipe apps are just the wrong places for somebody like me, would say I'm not ugly but not a beau either and while I could work a bit on my appearance (more sports- change my long hair to an average men cut- but also every leap year a girl tells me that she likes my appearance exactly how I am- just that they always are in relationships already. Or attration is not mutual. I hate it that I too am attracted by physical things, not only and at least can I say not to want to sleep with somebody whose character turns me off) Based on results from dating apps I really lost hope in finding a relationship again. Rationally it's no surprise, as men swipe right on 3/4 of the girls and means that girls'll get a match in 75% the attemps. Algorithms also have been found to promote the nice people and to neglect the others. It's competition in a field where it feels so wrong to have it. Raisin picking and guess it's both sexes here. From what I read and heard, only 25 percent actually meet somebody in the first month of use or so. The borderline girl above told me she swiped through all men of whole Zuerich(!). Or she whose second or third question was if I got a car. She and BFF wanted go shopping to a city ca. 3h drive away, if I "like to go with them". Thanks, I'm no fucking ATM.
Just what else are we left with today? Reason for going online was already that it's just online at first, and chances are better to talk one to one or at least have the illusion of this. I'm not the person to go into crowded, drunken locals alone and guess I won't find much matching people there either.
Fully agreed.
The one-and-half relationships I've had were complete coincidences, first one which lasted for almost 8 years with some months of break originated in an online forum about psychology. Second one was a classmate from evening school, but both initiated by me and this meant more than just one message but weeks-months of first messages. Without some drug-fueled energy I probably'd still be single. Had some short affairs, and contacts which might have become such, but without really trusting each other - and in some cases reasons not to trust - it's not comparable.
Also why we don't have a single free/open source dating app? They all want money and it'll be the guy (or both) paying when otherwise you're limited to like 20 swipes a day and just have zero chances. Then we have such well-sounding fraudsters like badoo, lovoo, whatnotoo which deeply hidden in their small text conditions admit to use fake singles. Oh well.
One looked chubby on her selfie-like pic but still a surprise seeing she must have weighed like 3x my kgs. Third was looking for a 'best friend', openly admitted having had sex with the last dates but wanted something 'with emotions', then almost slapped me for trying to (briefly) hug her on greeting and would say her intention was random revenge against men. Oh, then a sweet asian girl asking if I could 'host' her for a week, she wanted to have an adventure before flying back. We met, had sex but she didn't like my home lol/sigh. And at least one textbook example of borderline personality, would say mrs.revenge might also slightly fit into this. It's disturbing when girls tease all the time, really all the time just as bitch testing or however this is called. Sorry OT, just remembered them...
Well maybe that girl was in reality a 45yo male.
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