Diary of a Crack head
well im off work today and bored so i thought id write a trip report more or less about what happened to me a year ago or so. its my report on the drug cocaine, more or less crack cocaine and the road it led me down and many others.
im 22 right now and have been experimenting with drugs since 16 or so. first booze, then pot, acid, mushrooms, you get the idea.
anyways i met this hot 29 year old coke head soccor mom (she has 3 kids, and 2 of them are in soccor lol) she was big into the blow and did i say hot?. so i did a line with her. nothing. did 3 more lines, then it hit me. i have a hard time describing it, but it makes you feel good. on top of the world good. so i started doing more with her, every weekend,...plus i was unemployed at the time with a good size account at the bank so $$ wasent a problem. she sold the stuff so it was really cheap to get. at first it didnt seem addictive but that changed. then after a bit i decided to try crack on my own terms. i cooked it up myself with a spoon, etc, etc and dried it on a mirror. BAM!!! holy fuck sniffing coke was a waste of time now. that rush if intense. id describe it as a cocaine orgasm???
needless to say i kept doing it on and off for a few months with no real problems. i was also growing mushrooms in my parents house and selling them. i have been caught before growing pot/shrooms and this was the last time. i got kicked out and moved to a shitty part of town in the inner city. crack town
. my plan was to quit the rock and start up big with shrooms/pot, as i wanted money so didnt have to work at a 9/5 job. i had all the equipment and things took off.
1 weekend i was bored and took a stroll down the ave to score some rock. met some pregnant native about 15 or so along with some depressed fat bitch in a crack house who more or less was paranoid and sketchy. we smoked a few grams (i paid for it), but then some dirty native kicked me out. the pregant girl introduced me to this asian crack dealer named brendan. nice guy. he drove me to the ATM to get some cash hours later after i ran out. however the police followed us for about an hour, i guess he always drove the same car and he'd been selling for a while. freaked me out cause he had 3 oz's on him and needed me to swallow half that. needless to say it all went well and i got the 8 ball and rocked up that night by myself. i think i got another few 8-balls afterwards.
next weekend this girl i know calls. lets call her natasha. tight ass let me tell you .i had known her since grade 1 i think. turns out she had become a base bitch and was all into it. great i thought. she had cash too so we spent countless days rocking it up in my shitty basement apartment, 8 ball after 8-ball, non stop. a total crack fuck. smoking rock with crack whores is fun i must admit, you have no idea...everyone is just very ahh open minded i guess lol. i had a job BTW at this construction company working 10+ hours a day so i had more cash. lotsa cash.
at first it was on the weekends, but then to combat not sleeping for days i would smoke it every other day. then everyday even at work.
oh and i forgot to mention sometime during that period i went back and started cooking meth in my apartment to pay for that expensive habit of mine. id trade it 2:1 for rock with the asians. i had met one of the bigger guys so i got a better deal on it too .
i guess they used it to cut there soft (plain coke).
so now i had even more CRACK and the girl across the hall was into it too...and her friends. so i would smoke it everyday with them, plus tasha when she came around but she was getting paranoid as hell and i could not deal with her anymore.
after a while i became extremely paranoid. i had 10 plants growing in the closet, 175 jars of shrooms (the actual yield on that would be about 10 pounds dry) and a 1 oz batch at a time meth lab. things were getting weird. i started hearing and seeing things cause i wasent sleeping, quit calling/hanging out with friends.
i began to stare out the window constantly. i would turn the lights off and "patrol" the apartment thinking the cops were gonna raid my place cause it reeked of ammonia.
then at that point the jars got contaminated and half the plants died. i think it was from either the hydrogen chloride gas or the phosgene. one night i was in a rage of some sort and threw quarts and bottles of solvents everywhere...so that could be it. i was smoking it at the time to so im surprised i didnt blow myself up in a fireball.
the paranoia became worse and more "involved" where as i would see dancing medicine men in my living room talking to me asking me what my yield was on the extracting of the generic sudafed. luckily i had a hatchet beside my bed so i scared those dudes off pretty quickly. i was screaming non sense at my hallucinations waving a hatchet around in the dark at 3am in my apartment that was full of garbage and dozens of microwave popcorn bags that i would just throw in to get rid of the smell of crack. im sure the neibours heard but they never called the cops. i thought ppl were hiding in my closets and under the bed. i almost bought a gun...i would have but its the same price as an 8-ball so i said fuck it.
then it became so bad that i would drive around alone and smoke it, as those crackhead girls were getting weird i thought. i should have looked at myself in the mirror. a few times i would park on a busy road, pop the hood and "pretend" to be fixing something under the hood, secretely i was waiting until the fleet of cops and choppers arrived so i could dump the 8 balls in the oil filler cap thingy so they could not bust me. i would burn though a tank of gas driving around the city in circles because left hand turns were "too dangerous" i thought. i think my car can get me about 400-500 km on a full tank on gas and the city i live in is only about a million give or take lol. my cell phone bills were getting extreme as i would call the dealers about 10 times a day more or less. i only passed out a few times from smoking boulders but i never ended up in the hospital. nobody would have found me anyways.
then 1 day i come home from work and the landlord had broken it and stole the buds off my remaining plants. luckily my small time lab was dismantled and in various parts of the apartment. this sent my anxiety up 100x and i passed out in the shower. i wasent having a shower i was just hiding in there.. i took the setup to a friends house and he finished it there...oh and my real friends had no idea i was doing this BTW
fast forward a few oz's of crack severak weeks later and i was kicked out and had to move back in with my parents. my landlord was a big burly polish motherfucker BTW. i was attending college in 2 weeks and well that lasted 6 weeks and i dropped out. the college is right next to crack town so i would skip and pick up hookers and smoke with them cause my dealers dont wake up till noon and this was 9am
anyways i dont remember but my parents found out and that was shitty. i became very depressed and moody like you would not believe. they loaned me $2000 cause i was in debt, but i blew that check in about a week. now i was about $6000 in debt, no meth lab, no source of income (i quit my job). oh and i lost my car too. and i pawned alot of shit...they knew me on a first name basis down at the pawn shop.
the last time i smoked crack was on december 12th 2004. i would go into detail but i got a gun pressed against my temple and was ordered to get out of the crack dealers car as he thought i was trying to rob him. he had been up for a while too...so i guess thats why he was so sketched out.
so my mom took me to this drug center to see this counsellor. i told him my story but well he was more interested in bitching at me about the cooking/growing dope and stuff. HOWEVER!! he did mention NA...which is narcotics anonymous. told me to go to it. i told him where to go of course lol. so my mom dropped me off and i did go to it. i found out that there are countless others just like me, different war stories but its all the same.
a guy there told me of this treatment center..rehab. at that point i was totally broken in every way possible...i had nothing to lose at all. so i spent 3 weeks there. crackheads, meth victums, burnt out alcoholics...you name it they were there. i learned alot and witnessed alot of broken 40+ ppl there. i didnt wanna end up like them. rehab/detox is not a fun place to be.
i have blown about $25 000 on my crack habit and have nothing to show for it. im still in debt and my mind is still fucked although its slowly getting better.
anyways long story short last night i went to NA and got my 90 DAY keytag
hope this story makes sense as im just rambling on and on.
this is what crack has done to me
well im off work today and bored so i thought id write a trip report more or less about what happened to me a year ago or so. its my report on the drug cocaine, more or less crack cocaine and the road it led me down and many others.
im 22 right now and have been experimenting with drugs since 16 or so. first booze, then pot, acid, mushrooms, you get the idea.
anyways i met this hot 29 year old coke head soccor mom (she has 3 kids, and 2 of them are in soccor lol) she was big into the blow and did i say hot?. so i did a line with her. nothing. did 3 more lines, then it hit me. i have a hard time describing it, but it makes you feel good. on top of the world good. so i started doing more with her, every weekend,...plus i was unemployed at the time with a good size account at the bank so $$ wasent a problem. she sold the stuff so it was really cheap to get. at first it didnt seem addictive but that changed. then after a bit i decided to try crack on my own terms. i cooked it up myself with a spoon, etc, etc and dried it on a mirror. BAM!!! holy fuck sniffing coke was a waste of time now. that rush if intense. id describe it as a cocaine orgasm???
needless to say i kept doing it on and off for a few months with no real problems. i was also growing mushrooms in my parents house and selling them. i have been caught before growing pot/shrooms and this was the last time. i got kicked out and moved to a shitty part of town in the inner city. crack town
. my plan was to quit the rock and start up big with shrooms/pot, as i wanted money so didnt have to work at a 9/5 job. i had all the equipment and things took off. 1 weekend i was bored and took a stroll down the ave to score some rock. met some pregnant native about 15 or so along with some depressed fat bitch in a crack house who more or less was paranoid and sketchy. we smoked a few grams (i paid for it), but then some dirty native kicked me out. the pregant girl introduced me to this asian crack dealer named brendan. nice guy. he drove me to the ATM to get some cash hours later after i ran out. however the police followed us for about an hour, i guess he always drove the same car and he'd been selling for a while. freaked me out cause he had 3 oz's on him and needed me to swallow half that. needless to say it all went well and i got the 8 ball and rocked up that night by myself. i think i got another few 8-balls afterwards.
next weekend this girl i know calls. lets call her natasha. tight ass let me tell you
.i had known her since grade 1 i think. turns out she had become a base bitch and was all into it. great i thought. she had cash too so we spent countless days rocking it up in my shitty basement apartment, 8 ball after 8-ball, non stop. a total crack fuck. smoking rock with crack whores is fun i must admit, you have no idea...everyone is just very ahh open minded i guess lol. i had a job BTW at this construction company working 10+ hours a day so i had more cash. lotsa cash.at first it was on the weekends, but then to combat not sleeping for days i would smoke it every other day. then everyday even at work.
oh and i forgot to mention sometime during that period i went back and started cooking meth in my apartment to pay for that expensive habit of mine. id trade it 2:1 for rock with the asians. i had met one of the bigger guys so i got a better deal on it too
.i guess they used it to cut there soft (plain coke).
so now i had even more CRACK and the girl across the hall was into it too...and her friends. so i would smoke it everyday with them, plus tasha when she came around but she was getting paranoid as hell and i could not deal with her anymore.
after a while i became extremely paranoid. i had 10 plants growing in the closet, 175 jars of shrooms (the actual yield on that would be about 10 pounds dry) and a 1 oz batch at a time meth lab. things were getting weird. i started hearing and seeing things cause i wasent sleeping, quit calling/hanging out with friends.
i began to stare out the window constantly. i would turn the lights off and "patrol" the apartment thinking the cops were gonna raid my place cause it reeked of ammonia.
then at that point the jars got contaminated and half the plants died. i think it was from either the hydrogen chloride gas or the phosgene. one night i was in a rage of some sort and threw quarts and bottles of solvents everywhere...so that could be it. i was smoking it at the time to so im surprised i didnt blow myself up in a fireball.
the paranoia became worse and more "involved" where as i would see dancing medicine men in my living room talking to me asking me what my yield was on the extracting of the generic sudafed. luckily i had a hatchet beside my bed so i scared those dudes off pretty quickly. i was screaming non sense at my hallucinations waving a hatchet around in the dark at 3am in my apartment that was full of garbage and dozens of microwave popcorn bags that i would just throw in to get rid of the smell of crack. im sure the neibours heard but they never called the cops. i thought ppl were hiding in my closets and under the bed. i almost bought a gun...i would have but its the same price as an 8-ball so i said fuck it.
then it became so bad that i would drive around alone and smoke it, as those crackhead girls were getting weird i thought. i should have looked at myself in the mirror. a few times i would park on a busy road, pop the hood and "pretend" to be fixing something under the hood, secretely i was waiting until the fleet of cops and choppers arrived so i could dump the 8 balls in the oil filler cap thingy so they could not bust me. i would burn though a tank of gas driving around the city in circles because left hand turns were "too dangerous" i thought. i think my car can get me about 400-500 km on a full tank on gas and the city i live in is only about a million give or take lol. my cell phone bills were getting extreme as i would call the dealers about 10 times a day more or less. i only passed out a few times from smoking boulders but i never ended up in the hospital. nobody would have found me anyways.
then 1 day i come home from work and the landlord had broken it and stole the buds off my remaining plants. luckily my small time lab was dismantled and in various parts of the apartment. this sent my anxiety up 100x and i passed out in the shower. i wasent having a shower i was just hiding in there.. i took the setup to a friends house and he finished it there...oh and my real friends had no idea i was doing this BTW
fast forward a few oz's of crack severak weeks later and i was kicked out and had to move back in with my parents. my landlord was a big burly polish motherfucker BTW. i was attending college in 2 weeks and well that lasted 6 weeks and i dropped out. the college is right next to crack town so i would skip and pick up hookers and smoke with them cause my dealers dont wake up till noon and this was 9am
anyways i dont remember but my parents found out and that was shitty. i became very depressed and moody like you would not believe. they loaned me $2000 cause i was in debt, but i blew that check in about a week. now i was about $6000 in debt, no meth lab, no source of income (i quit my job). oh and i lost my car too. and i pawned alot of shit...they knew me on a first name basis down at the pawn shop.
the last time i smoked crack was on december 12th 2004. i would go into detail but i got a gun pressed against my temple and was ordered to get out of the crack dealers car as he thought i was trying to rob him. he had been up for a while too...so i guess thats why he was so sketched out.
so my mom took me to this drug center to see this counsellor. i told him my story but well he was more interested in bitching at me about the cooking/growing dope and stuff. HOWEVER!! he did mention NA...which is narcotics anonymous. told me to go to it. i told him where to go of course lol. so my mom dropped me off and i did go to it. i found out that there are countless others just like me, different war stories but its all the same.
a guy there told me of this treatment center..rehab. at that point i was totally broken in every way possible...i had nothing to lose at all. so i spent 3 weeks there. crackheads, meth victums, burnt out alcoholics...you name it they were there. i learned alot and witnessed alot of broken 40+ ppl there. i didnt wanna end up like them. rehab/detox is not a fun place to be.
i have blown about $25 000 on my crack habit and have nothing to show for it. im still in debt and my mind is still fucked although its slowly getting better.
anyways long story short last night i went to NA and got my 90 DAY keytag
hope this story makes sense as im just rambling on and on.
this is what crack has done to me
