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Crack Cocaine

Ozekat

Ozekat

Bluelighter
Joined
Dec 13, 2009
Messages
283
Location
Kentucky
I really don't want to post this, it is utterly humiliating to me.

I've gone through my first long run with crack. Its lasted about a month, and its taken hundreds of my hard earned dollars.

Like I just recently posted in another thread in SL, sometimes we have to go there as drug addicts and figure all this shit out. But after going back to the rock again and again I've come to terms with the fact that there is no lesson to learn at this point. If I go "back 2 crack" again, it will only end in humiliation.

The first few times I got seriously blasted on this stuff the comedown was gut-wrenching. I've never so quickly been brought to my knees from such a short lived buzz. I would literally cry my eyes out on this first few rounds of crack come-downs....so much worse than just snorting blow.

Anyone else out there struggling with cocaine or crack addiction, or who has been where I'm at before? I'd love to hear your responses, and advice or suggestions.

I just feel like I can't "get away" with doing any hard drugs anymore. Its back to basics for me, kratom and weed and minimal amounts of alcohol.
 
My brother struggled with this drug and his descriptions of the last years of his addiction were horrendous. Leave it behind. Nothing good can come of it.<3
 
Count yourself lucky that you are only "hundreds of hard earned dollars" lite....I went thru yrs of savings in six months and got down to 95 pounds. Evil stuff...
 
yep it awful.. dirty hit after dirty hit. Only things that worse is an IV coke addiction and that drained me of the type of money I dont even feal comfortable talking about. This addiction is all about learning how to kill the cravings.
 
Learning how to kill the cravings? That sounds hopeful.

I turned it down tonight, and I'm not interested in any form of coke. It feels good. Cocaine is annoying to me anyway, because the high is so short lived and that is always followed by a shitty, if not downright dirty and awful crash.
 
Those are great ideas. We have had an extremely harsh winter down here in KY this year. I'm looking forward to spring and summer.

No, I'm not mixing it with alcohol. I agree, it is seconds of pleasure followed by crash and burn.
 
Yeah, luckily the good thing about coke/crack is that when you're only a few weeks into a binge, you basically just have to sleep it off for a couple days in order to get past it. You won't have to "kick" and the cravings subside fairly quickly (in my experience, anyway). Stay away from that shit, as others have said "hundreds" of dollars isn't that bad - crack/coke can easily drain someone of thousands in a matter of days.

It really is just seconds of pleasure, following by hours of hell. The cost/benefit of doing it is so skewed it's ridiculous.
 
ozekat said:
No, I'm not mixing it with alcohol. I
agree, it is seconds of pleasure
followed by crash and burn.
Click to expand...
So true. I used to enjoy the occasional rock or three but realised that crack is a drug that never lets you reach a point of satisfaction. It's just smoking rock after rock without ever hitting a spot where you think 'I feel nice now, so I can stop smoking now'.
Nasty drug.
 
Crack has a beginning a middle but no end, it eventually becomes about chasing a memory of a good time you might have had with it other than chasing the high and you could possibly do this for years if you do not just accept the fact that crack is an addictive drug with no finale, one day you will wake up and realize years have gone by and not understand how that happened... Worst drug I ever did and hope to god I never find myself in that spinning wheel again.
 
Well, hello folks. I guess my update was "Misery" which I posted in TDS. Check it out, its closed but still worth a read.

Yes I have smoked more rocks since my initial post. (Lol?, I think not such an lol)

Ahhh.....I just don't know what to do. As of now I am drinking beer, waiting on this cursed money to arrive so I can......burn it up in drugs? I really wish I had a huge flat blunt right now.

I'm seriously contemplating dropping some LSD. Always scared of the psychedelics when I know my life is shit, cuz this stuff makes me think.....but having a good time sounds nice too.

I just want to go far, far away. Maybe the LSD can take me where I want to be? I've got no one to blame but myself.

Yep, I'm confused, as if this scattered and disjointed post wasn't enough to give that away.

I sure hope today goes well. But when all I want to do is stretch the limits of how high I can get without killing or OD'ing, who knows?

Drugs are definitely not happiness. Damn, I need some weed.
 
I love and hate drug so much
They all have different highs and disadvantages
Like heroin's are overdose and physical addiction And cravings
Coke's are strong friending/ psychological addiction
LSD's is bad trips
Etc
 
I wanted to update this thread.

I'm doing incredibly good. I have stopped all hard drugs. I get cravings but they are easy to fight off when I utilize my buddhist practice and go to my buddhist meetings.....

I hope everyone is having a good weekend....I sure as hell did! And I even have a few days of stone cold sobriety under my belt now!!

Life is much more enjoyable this way.
 
^^ Awesome man keep it up. Buddhism is indeed a very powerful force in recovery. The parallels between working the 12 steps and working a buddhist program are pretty numerous as well. Maybe not at first glance, but if you're familiar with what it means to actually work the steps you will see a lot of commonalities when reading buddhist literature.
 
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