Controlling how I think and anxiety

floatingaround

Bluelighter
Joined
Jul 15, 2012
Messages
625
Location
NSW
So this is my issue. I don't class myself as being dependant or an addict to any real drugs drugs arnt my problem, although I think years ago smoking so much weed and using acid around 16-17 has played a big part in how I am today.

I'm 21, I've used every drug you can think. I've shot ice, heroin and coke..not much I haven't tried.

Anyway, I see a lot of people posting about using drugs to escape their problems, and in turn they get hooked (substances like H, or meth for example). For me, I go through very bad cases of anxiety and depression, it comes down to my thinking of situations.

Recently I went through troubles with a females, and relised before I even met her I was happy in life.. I didn't have all this anxiety and depression and overthinking going on. This thing I had with girl wasn't ideal by any means, what relationships are?

I've come to relise that my anxious and over analyzing of things in life has become out of control. I believe this is the reason I no longer talk to this girl.

Anyway, I went to an AA meeting the other night to get a feel for things, it's was hard for me to relate though, I could see the similarities..but personally when I'm going thru depression the last thing I want to be doing is drinking or smoking or doing any drugs as they make me dwell over the situation. I suppose if you included heroin and ice into the picture I could probabaly get away with masking my problems temporarily, but luckily for me the thought of using ice is a turn off, and I can't get any opiates.

I guess this is more a rant, but I would like to know if other people have gone through similar? Say with your girlfriend, and you lost trust, then u became anxious of what she was doing, overthink things until you 'snap'. I can't seem to control my thoughts and feelings well, at all. I mean..when something comes up, and it's negative for me I think the worst, and then that worst thought gets concreted into my head before I can even rationalize or think clearly of the problem when it comes up. It's all anxiety, it's just a bitch.

I've needed to see a psych about my mental state for a very long time. I don't think I can be in a relationship with the way my mind thinks ATM. I'm far to jealous, and when I get angry I hold resentment..I hate it. It ruins things massively and the last thing I need are more issues.

This was more a rant, I suppose this could be merged to the rant there.

My question is. Does anyone else feel the same, or go through this without using drugs? I mean I know people go throug problems and cover them up by using, but how do YOU personally deal with those problems when your sober?
 
have you tried cardio exercise 5 times a week for 30 mins (swimming, running) for over 2 weeks paired with a diet solely consisting of whole foods (nothing processed or junky)? that does wonders for my scattered brain

another thing worth exploring is a regular mindfulness meditation practice, theres a thread on meditation which has some good sources on this site if you do a search
 
Thanks for the reply man. I will keep that in mind and buy proper foods. I'll sort out an exercise routine.
 
its difficult getting into exercise, but once you start applying yourself to the routine (try not to have an all or nothing mentality and do it in maneagable steps) it becomes a new healthy addiction
 
my experiance

I am going through that as well. I think its just your brain regaining coping skills you've lost over the years of abuse. you used to cover up things you didnt want to feel. i was on a 4 year bender, and i didnt more drugs than i am care to admit, i got a DUI and its been the best thing for me, i was going down a bad path and hurting myself. I was going insane wondering what was happening and years after been clean. after years of abuse it takes a while to get back up. Im struggling but fighting it. You just need to get of into the sun, get exercise, dance, music. art. try everything.. tell friends you trust whats going on. they prolly have similar stories, ive seen the more you let people in the more insight you gain. do more of the things you love. force yourself. but it starts to get better. i was in denial od depression of a long time till i ended up having a panic attack and it all became clear. Everything started coming out. things i had kept down. dont give up. and just learn from what you've been through. Much luck man. one day at a time.
 
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