Hey everyone.
For the past 3 - almost 4 - years, I have admittedly had a problem with drugs and depression. In my first year of abusing drugs, I went on a crazy MDMA binge. This did an insane number on me; I STILL have an anxiety problem to this day (had ZERO anxiety before-hand). Up until a year ago, I basically did whatever I could get my hands on. Tons of cocaine. Tons of psychs. RC's...
A year ago, I discovered Opiods, and I basically left the old me behind with that first hit of oxy. I was addicted psychologically straight off the bat. It escalated within 2 months to me joining The I.V.y League and shooting up about 100 to 150 dollars of heroin a day. What made opiods so addictive to me, is that they COMPLETELY cured my depression (that I had since early highschool), my anxiety, gave me confidence, energy... I just loved the person I was on opiods.
Fast forward to today, I am currently maintaining from going into withdrawals on Poppy Seed Tea. If I stop, I go into bad withdrawals and - worse - the depression and anxiety return. I somehow still have a lot of good things going for me despite all this shit; I am going away to school in the fall to finish my final year in University computer science, and I am currently working at EMS doing local I.T support in my area. I have been doing extremely well at my job, people love me there, but it's only because of how lifted my depression is with the PST.
I have been considering suboxone for a number of reasons. First of all, I have tried to quit a number of times [opiates], and failed. A few times, I actually made it through W/D, and then went back to getting high because of my depression. I cannot afford the time it takes to scrounge for opiods this year at school, or the stress from having that monkey on my back, so I would rather just maintain on suboxone. It would also be highly beneficial for my depression; I have heard that although you don't get "high" on suboxone, for many, the anti-depressant qualities of opiods in general are there. This would really help me immensly with school, work, my personal life... and obviously to stay clean from other opiods.
I believe that the arguement that "Suboxone is an addictive narcotic and should not be used for depression" is bullshit. I have experience with cipralex, and let me tell you, I found the withdrawal from that shit just as bad if not worse then my withdrawals from heroin and oxycodone in it's own ways. So you can treat depression an addictive and shitty SSRI, but cannot with an addictive but highly effective opiod? Bullshit...
What do you guys think? I honestly - at this point - believe that this would be very beneficial to my mental health. Can family doctors in Canada prescribe suboxone?
Thank you in advance guys. Sorry if I rambled a little in my post. I really appreciate the advice you all have to offer.
For the past 3 - almost 4 - years, I have admittedly had a problem with drugs and depression. In my first year of abusing drugs, I went on a crazy MDMA binge. This did an insane number on me; I STILL have an anxiety problem to this day (had ZERO anxiety before-hand). Up until a year ago, I basically did whatever I could get my hands on. Tons of cocaine. Tons of psychs. RC's...
A year ago, I discovered Opiods, and I basically left the old me behind with that first hit of oxy. I was addicted psychologically straight off the bat. It escalated within 2 months to me joining The I.V.y League and shooting up about 100 to 150 dollars of heroin a day. What made opiods so addictive to me, is that they COMPLETELY cured my depression (that I had since early highschool), my anxiety, gave me confidence, energy... I just loved the person I was on opiods.
Fast forward to today, I am currently maintaining from going into withdrawals on Poppy Seed Tea. If I stop, I go into bad withdrawals and - worse - the depression and anxiety return. I somehow still have a lot of good things going for me despite all this shit; I am going away to school in the fall to finish my final year in University computer science, and I am currently working at EMS doing local I.T support in my area. I have been doing extremely well at my job, people love me there, but it's only because of how lifted my depression is with the PST.
I have been considering suboxone for a number of reasons. First of all, I have tried to quit a number of times [opiates], and failed. A few times, I actually made it through W/D, and then went back to getting high because of my depression. I cannot afford the time it takes to scrounge for opiods this year at school, or the stress from having that monkey on my back, so I would rather just maintain on suboxone. It would also be highly beneficial for my depression; I have heard that although you don't get "high" on suboxone, for many, the anti-depressant qualities of opiods in general are there. This would really help me immensly with school, work, my personal life... and obviously to stay clean from other opiods.
I believe that the arguement that "Suboxone is an addictive narcotic and should not be used for depression" is bullshit. I have experience with cipralex, and let me tell you, I found the withdrawal from that shit just as bad if not worse then my withdrawals from heroin and oxycodone in it's own ways. So you can treat depression an addictive and shitty SSRI, but cannot with an addictive but highly effective opiod? Bullshit...
What do you guys think? I honestly - at this point - believe that this would be very beneficial to my mental health. Can family doctors in Canada prescribe suboxone?
Thank you in advance guys. Sorry if I rambled a little in my post. I really appreciate the advice you all have to offer.
