confused

[emily_roxs]

Confused
I don’t know what I want
I don’t know how I feel
I don’t know what to do
I don’t know if I can deal
I feel the rage inside of me
I don’t know what its from
I feel the tears well up in my eyes
I don’t know how come
I don’t know what to do bout him
I don’t know how I feel
I get so confused
Everything’s so complicated
I know my mom loves me
I know my friends do too
But they don’t understand
How I feel down deep inside
I wish I could find a way to disappear
Every little thing that happens
Pushes me closer to the edge
Everything you say to me
Everything you do
Everything you don’t think of
I do
If I could have just one wish
It would be for these feelings
To turn to dust
And blow away
Into the wind for ever
I am sick of the tears
I am sick of the sadness
I am sick of these hopeless feelings
Shall forever will they stay
Is my darkest fears
I just want to be happy
I don’t want to cry
I wish Karen would take my hand
And I could say good-bye
I don’t want to let him go
I fear that I may loose him
Because if he should die
I would not be able to survive
No one seems to notice
No one seems to care
I wish I didn’t have to wear this mask
But I fear everyone would stare
Pardon me for being sad
I apologize because I did not know
It effected you
I don’t know what I want
I don’t know what to do
The only thing I want
Is not to loose these feelings for him
I feel them falling from my grip
As we speak
It seems as if my heart
Has sprung a leak
And there they go running down
My cheeks
Tears of sadness
Turn to joy
Finally I think I may
Be able to let go
To let go of someone
Who I felt close
To you who I felt I understood
And felt you had a sense of
Understanding for me
It is tough in this world to find
Someone like me
I fear I’ll go through life
Lonely
I will pop all the pills
And smoke all the drugs
And drink all the drinks
Just to make me smile
Even if it’s not real
For the moment it may seem
I will draw the picture
And paint the portrait
Of a lonely person
That I feel deep inside
No one to relate to
No one to say
Wow you just like me
So tonight as I lay
Myself down to sleep
I will dream of someone
Who feels the same way

 

[mr_fluffy]

hang in there, to pull out that old, tired cliche, it's always darker before the dawn. and don't try to deny or ignore your feelings, consider them, question them, get used to them. life without feelings, (good or bad) would be rather bland and terribly boring.

 

[ssilb]

i agree with mr_fluffy, without ups and downs, there is no "highlights" in your life, you need the bad to enjoy the good,

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"love simple isnt it"
"love, simple isnt it."
"love, simple... isnt it?"