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Confess Your Drug Sins Here, 1 at a time.

OD's, loss of my youth due and many friends and never see again because I couldn't see what was happening to me.
 
^^^ My last OD, my friend took a photo of me on the floor.....I got out of the hospital and went back to work.... Then back to my buddies house and smoked crack.....the way I fell onto the ground and the position I was left in fucked my leg up for over a month....
 
I guess it's weird, whether I wanted to see it or it really was there....but I could swear in that photo, unconscious on the floor, crammed up between a guitar amp cabinet and a coffee table, I could swear in that photo that I had a smile on my face...
 
I hate thinking about OD's. I have had my share in this life. A long time ago OD'd and was sent to a hospital where I was in a coma for a couple of days. It was beyond horrible.
 
^^^ Jeeze man...I'm sorry to hear that...but atleast you are still here on this side of the lawn.....I hate thinking of them too, that first one I had where my mother found me, I'll think of that everyday for the rest of my life.....
...the one where my friend took a photo... I certainly wasn't trying to make light of it by saying I thought I saw a smile on my face..... It's some heavy stuff....
....it was probably my face being pulled back in a weird way while I was lying motionless on the floor...
 
I know, it's pretty f**ked up. For few days after waking up from my coma I couldn't listen or talk. I thought it was going to be permanent. I felt completely miserable, fearful. Desperate I guess.
 
^^^^thats intense.....what was the OD from? The one that sank you into a coma? Sorry for asking? I think you mentioned it in this thread at some point, I've just totally forgot, I read through the pages a couple days ago

That first one I had was intense, I don't remember feeling any pain though, until after some time had passed in the hospital...my veins started burning and becoming painful in the hospital bed, I guess it was the naloxone booting all the painkilling fentanyl off my receptors
 
Oh jeeze....I'm sorry that you had to go through all that man....you are still here...and that's behind you...and you are helping people out by sharing your story and information...

....this one time I had a bunch of oxy in my system already, but my friend gave me one of his carries of his methadone...I drank the whole thing after doing oxy all day...I woke up to go to work the next day and I was violently puking all morning..... I guess to much opes??...it was uncontrollable... I'd have to run to the washroom repeatedly.... And I'd spew huge each time.....I never knew I had so much inside me to spew..... multiple bursts each time too...until around lunch...

...it was weird, I was fine all night... Pure scratchy bliss.... Went to sleep...woke up my regular time to go to work... Made it like 15 minutes, then just started spewing....
 
Yes, the last thing I remember was me coughing strongly and strangely - and putting it all out, so they thought. Suddenly I blacked out. My wife said I was unconscious but would still open my eyes. Just before the ambulance arrived, they've tried CPR and then I was intubated for airway.

After the first 24 hours in coma the doctors said to my family not to expect too much. I woke up on the third day in intesive care, all wired up. And since my lungs were pushed to my back it was not possible to breathe by my own, that's when they put me into an induced coma. I lost some part of my hearing, like I said no voice would come out either. I was terrified. Can't describe that.

I guess that regardless of the amount one takes the body will instinctively try to put it out, consciously or not. In the process one may drown. I was lucky not especially to have survived, but to survive without significant long term impairments. Some people suffer brain damage, others lose movements, or stop talking. And all of that can also happen with a single and routine H shot.
 
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That's heavy man....
...sorry, that methadone experience I mentioned wasn't one of my OD's...all three have been fentanyl....well the last 2 were heroin and fentanyl, I didn't know some asshole thinks it's good to lace heroin with fentanyl.... But the first time was a shot of nothing but fentanyl....that time I woke up, or gained consciousness in a hospital bed with the tube taped to my mouth with it going down my trachea.... It was painful....i started gagging immediatly , nurses all ran to me to tell me to relax and proceeded to pull the tube out....I'm not sure how long I went without oxygen ...like I said.. I feel bad for putting my mom through that....

....the stupid doctor in the ER wanted to keep me there for observation for three days because the idiot thought that's how long fentanyl lasted....I had to explain to him the transdermal patch when used correctly should last 3 days, but I had cut it open and used it improperly, and demanded to be released.... He gave me a weird look, then looked at his clipboard... Then walked out of the room....I guess he went and checked Wiki on his computer and found out I was right, and that I can be released as soon as I go through psych...I answered all the questions, about suicide and things like that, got released.... Got home, showered then went right to the beer store......I guess I should've rested up at home, but I was pretty wreckless I guess....got some weed and beer, then came home and went to bed...... I don't think I lost any brain function due to lack of oxygen....??? I actually felt pretty good...

....I'm not a fan of fentanyl.... It doesn't give me euphoria.... I mean...dont get me wrong ...i could cut my hand off and probably not feel any pain, but I don't get that euphoria that heroin gives me.....
 
I know precisely what you mean. I have used Fentanyl patches before, I think it was 50 mcg, or 3 patches of 25 mcg. It was 'good' only because I slept well, nothing else. I would normally miss the rush from dope which was not good and incredibly dangerous.

But getting heroin laced with Fentanyl is different, you don't have a way to know how much you can actually use, besides it's easy to OD using regular doses. Sorry to hear about your experience. Indeed, getting the family involved only to realize everything is f**ked up. All the regrets most of us have to deal with for years and years.
 
I made a promise to myself 2 years ago I would NEVER touch meth again, yet every couple months I seem to do it for a couple days..... I was on a bender a month ago and drove my car 70 mph into the bumper of a beautiful 22 year old girl.... I watched as emergency services had to pry here car doors open and I sobbed on the side of the road as I thought I'd injured her permanently......


Swallowed all my drugs I had on me but the cops found a meth pipe and a syringe in the car.... just awful
 
Just so unnecessary... Fentanyl in the skag. that is. ..it was the same thing both times....first shot...I didn't get the rush...no euphoria... So I slammed right after.... I knew I wouldn't get the rush....first shot rush is always the best ....but I was just looking for euphoria.... Then just done , OD'd......the first OD like that I thought if I made it to the sink and just....?? I actually don't even know why I thought I had to make it to a sink.....but for some reason that's what I thought I needed to do...I made it like 3 steps, then just collapsed on this Ottoman couch extension.... Last thing I remember was my friends face, and the feeling of me being pulled up from the collar of my shirt...then black...then waking in the hospital....

...the next time, same scenario.... First shot, no satisfaction.... Poked again... Then fell forward.... I almost spilt all the gear....spoon...basically the whole table infront of me....last thing I remember that time was twitching as I was falling forward... And my friend pushing me away from the table with the gear on it....I fell on the floor on my stomach with my leg twisted up underneath my abdomen... And my face down on the floor..... My friend said he waited for a bit.... Broke out the naloxone kit and applied.... I started breathing again.....
....smoked crack about 20 min after I came to....

....went back to work.... Back from a 3+ hour lunch break....., and could barely walk from laying in that position with my leg all twisted up underneath me....actually , sorry I snorted a little line of heroin..... Prolly only the second time in my life i snorted heroin....
...but I think I was traumatised and scared to slam, but needed opes in my system....so snorted a line, took a few hoots off the crack pipe, went back to work....

...the last two OD's happened within 3 months of each other....

....I saw the photo my friend took.....my skin was almost blue....my lips were blue....
 
Erikmen said:
I know precisely what you mean. I have used Fentanyl patches before, I think it was 50 mcg, or 3 patches of 25 mcg. It was 'good' only because I slept well, nothing else. I would normally miss the rush from dope which was not good and incredibly dangerous.

But getting heroin laced with Fentanyl is different, you don't have a way to know how much you can actually use, besides it's easy to OD using regular doses. Sorry to hear about your experience. Indeed, getting the family involved only to realize everything is f**ked up. All the regrets most of us have to deal with for years and years.
Click to expand...


When I would actually use the patch properly, by the third day....I would always have such a huge headache..... I hated it....but when I knew nothing would be around for a while, i'd give in and just take the patches from the guy, slap one or two on....depending on which ones they were....and either quarter or cut open the patch and eat it.....the ones that were like all plastic.... Forget what those were called?...but no gel or milky stuff.... I would quarter and put it on my tongue like blotters..that was years ago...

...but it relieved any ill feelings... But no euphoria..... We have a huge fentanyl lace problem here now where I'm from.....someone I worked with OD'd and died from that shit.....

....stupid shit....I dunno where it's all coming from.....the fentanyl???. But I wish people would give it a rest.....I understand that the guy I get it off of prolly isn't the one who's doing it..but I just hate that ....

...It happened to me with MDMA too....well , not OD'd....but.... the one time it was 5-meo-dipt.... I was working as a cook when I dosed that one....

...the next was 2cb.....

....but both times I was having visuals I did not want...or atleast wasn't expecting..... After I knew what it was....I talked to the idiot who was selling... Told him this isn't cool, someone is going to get hurt....bought out what the had left.....the 2cb time I was experiencing extreme visuals and a huge body load , I took 5 doses of what I thought was MDMA....but was 2cb...I was at a party....they almost called the ambulance...
....I could atleast squeeze some words out of my mouth.....particularly 'no....it would make it worse......'
After I knew what it was, both times..., I enjoyed the trips I had.....
....I hate fuckers that do things like that, selling shit, that isn't the shit...
 
^very true. They ought to just say what it is they're selling. Might not sell as easy but I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I knowingly sold someone a completely different substance, claiming it was E or whatever.

Funny thing is I'd actually pay more for 2cb than I would for xtc. Maybe that's because of where I'm located. Dunno.
 
The Slim Shadey wanna be probably got it not knowing how powerful it could be, like..."yo bro, I've done mushrooms before...I can handle this yo...."
Nobody really likes the 'commitment' drugs around where I'm from...I have to drive out of town to get acid...

he probably tested it out got knocked on his ass by it, freaked out and tried to flip it quick and sold it as MDMA....
Funny thing is I asked him if he had ever done MDMA before, and he said
"No..."
I told him MDMA doesn't do what this does....he comes back with ...
" Yo bro, yea...it's just really pure...."
Not more than 2 sentences later in this amazing conversation... I told him about how it gives me the shits...he comes back with...
"Yea...it's cut wit' some weird shit man....I get the shits like mad from it too...."

So it's really pure? Or is it cut with some weird shit??



the only thing I don't like about 2cb is I'm one of the lucky individuals who gets bad diahrea from it...nothing a whole box of loperamide doesn't cure...shitting on 2cb is pretty interesting.... I guess any psychedelic for that matter....but the whole box of lope kind of just turned the squirt into solid...still gotta poop alot...
Ha, sorry for the details
 
I have been in klonapin/ xanax/ temazepam etc for over a decade... then I found etizolam and clonazolam. How can I be honest with me doctor to be successfully weaned off benzodiapines if I tell them that not only have I been legally prescribed benzodiazepines for years but now 1-3 clonazolam. No doctor my ins will pay for will consider me anything other than a drug addict, which, I'll admit I am. I want to change. Anyone have any advice? Etizolam helped a lot but it's not illegal in my state. I was even almost off benzos without anxiety and panic until they banned etizolam in my state and now I've been having seizures when I don't get benzos. :/ I don't know what i should do. I wish I could just be honest with my doc and they can wean me.
 
Can't you tell him about the rc benzos? Why not? They're supposed to help you.. Not the other way around. Say you were drawn to them because of anxiety or something. Or isn't that a possibility? If so why not?
 
Yes, I would suggest you to go to a doctor and be totally honest with him. If he or she finds that you don't need benzos they still have to medicate you accordingly. Give it a try. Coming off of benzos are really difficult, not only because of the panic but due to the increasing anxiety over small things. For so long we have had all of these issues silenced and now it's all loud and not to clear. You need to stop it slowly IMO.
 
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