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Coming out of DXM trip, need help

lyricabuddy

Bluelighter
Joined
Jul 31, 2011
Messages
111
I'm trying to figure out if I had a psychotic break / schizophrenic episode, or if this type of trip (which I will explain) is common with anyone else?

Let me preface this by saying I recently came to understand God / Creation in terms of the 'simulation theory', where everything exists and is interconnected as part of a code, mathematics programmed into nature.

I feel like this new-found understanding of reality has been causing me to trip in a different way on dxm / nos than I used to before I learned about the simulation theory. I'm not sure if this is the reason for my hallucinations on DXM, or if I had actually "over stressed" my brain and was experiencing a psychotic episode. Any input would be much appreciated as I am concerned about my mental health.

I was on a high 2nd - 3rd plateau dose of dxm and was also hitting the nos (3 boxes of chargers) and eventually, every time I would hit the nos, I would get the feeling that I was hallucinating beyond what would be considered normal for these drugs. I kept getting a strong sense that I was accessing "the matrix" and seeing things which "weren't meant to be seen". Much like in the movie the Truman Show where in the end he is sailing his boat to the edge of the ocean to try to reach the REAL reality.

I was having brief hallucinations of the 1's and zeros flying everywhere and saw my body moving rapidly and precisely like a machine as if part of the code (just like in the movie and extremely hard to explain). I was also seeing subtle flickering in my digital clock and TV. At the time, I was truly convinced that something supernatural was happening and that I had reached an alternate reality.

I was convinced that the nos was allowing me to "penetrate" my bubble of reality just enough to see "the back end of the computer program" we might live in while on the high dose dxm. Overall the tip was pretty dark, every time I hit the nos, I kept feeling like I was seeing something that wasn't meant to be seen and I was now somehow an uninvited guest part of a secret cosmological society.

My question to you all: is this indicative of a psychotic break / my brain not being able to handle these drugs? My understanding is that your brain can more or less "snap" under too much stress leading to brain damage and I'm concerned that this happened. Has anyone else had something like this happen and how can I know if I am being safe?
 
Thanks, that means a lot to hear. I read your report and can relate to a lot of it. You hit the nail on the head when you talked about popping the bubble membrane into a different world. There were points where this bubble became very tangible to me. I will definitely be looking into this.

I would like to know: is this type of experience safe? I've read that when people experience a psychotic break, it is followed by severe cognitive deficits... Is something like this considered a psychotic break, or just hallucinations? I've experienced many hallucinations on things such as lsd and mushrooms, but they FELT like hallucinations... What I experienced on the DXM & NOS felt 100% real.

What wound up happening is I was getting frightened that I was pushing my brain too far and seeing things that I should be seeing, so I was trying to scale back my hallucinations either by diverting my focus and / or taking in less nos. As a result I feel like there there was much more exploring that could have been done and would like to do this again soon but worried about causing brain damage...
 
I was on a high 2nd - 3rd plateau dose of dxm and was also hitting the nos (3 boxes of chargers) and eventually, every time I would hit the nos, I would get the feeling that I was hallucinating beyond what would be considered normal for these drugs

So you were combining dissociatives and got really dissociated. While it suffers from vagueness of definition, are you familiar with the concept of a hole? (I'd link, but internet is being horrendously slow right now). Not everyone enjoys that sort of thing, but what you went through was a typical high-dose dissociative experience. I love it, and get really frustrated/disappointed if I don't get to the point of believing that I've woken up and discovered Reality.

Overfrequent use can be detrimental to your mental health, but it's the sorta thing that'll pass when you take a break. You'll have to find what works for you. Treat dissociatives like psychedelics with a serious abuse potential, and exercise reasonable caution.
 
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