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Coming off Invega/Xeplion (paliperidone) injections v 12

KubiKook said:
Yeah, psychiatry is surely a grotesque profession. I got misdiagnosed & mandated this monstrosity of a drug. I was holistically oriented, into health & wellness & fitness, totally opposed to these poisons. Even though I knew they were bad, I never could have imagined a medication & subsequent withdrawal could do this level of damage. And it appears to have permanently changed my brain. Maybe not, but I can't endure much more of this abject misery. I'm not remotely the same person. I can barely function. I used to be so competent & capable. I've lost almost everything.

Sorry you're going through hell too. I admire your drive to overcome this mess & write a book about your nightmare experience. I used to write prose & poetry. I was also a singer/songwriter, played guitar too. I don't have the creative motivation or inspiration anymore, not even close. I spend the entire day like a tortured zombie, fixated on the TV which I'm not really able to engage with well, but it passes time, which is meaningless now, because each day is the same, nothing but misery, second by second, no relief from the grief, no joy or pleasure at all. WTF?! Peace Yogi.
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Samaneri Jayasera on YouTube or Spotify, please turn this on for your own good, everything is frequency and hearing quotes of kundalini awakened people makes this hell more bearable.
 
KubiKook said:
Yes, this feels hopeless to me, my life is absolutely ruined, I can't live at home anymore, me & my cat are tortured in our new space, I can't imagine getting home again, everything it takes to manage a household & property, I (mentally) can't do any of it anymore, this is insane, the recovery stories don't help me, everybody's brain is different, my change feels permanent, and this is not a life that's sustainable, I'm not viable as a normal human being, I can't take care of myself, the future looks like some kind of nursing home or maybe worse, I couldn't bear that, I have people around me talking about the power of positive thinking, they just don't get it, it's not my mindset that's creating this complex, it's an abominable change in my brain composition, what a horror!

I'm not sure what my doses were. I think the second one was 234mg. Maybe 156. Either way, how can two injections cause such misery for such a long time?! I need a miracle & sadly, I don't believe in them anymore, my faith is completely gone, it was such a strong foundation of my life, what a grievous loss, so much loss, I used to be a charismatic, good-looking guy in good shape,
highly intelligent & highly conscious, very artistic, wrote many poems & songs, was finishing a book, landscaped my 1.4-acre property, built stone walls, planted so many trees, bushes & perennials, such color in season, attracting so much wildlife, how can this happen to us?!, and where's it heading?!, tragically & horrifyingly, I think for me it's gotta be suicide, don't think I can't survive this much longer. We shall see. Thank you for the message.
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I'm so sorry you're going through this. Reading your message, I can feel how much you've lost, and I understand why you're grieving the person you used to be. It sounds incredibly painful. I know it's hard to believe in recovery when you've been suffering for so long, and I won't pretend to know what your outcome will be. But I've seen people improve even after they thought nothing would ever change. That's one of the reasons I'm still trying to hold on myself. What you wrote about your life before all of this—your creativity, your home, your writing, your garden—it shows that those parts of you existed. Right now they may feel buried, but they are still part of who you are. I feel like my personality has changed too. I used to be a determined, confident, and outgoing girl who loved reading, spending time with friends, and astronomy. Now I've become someone who spends most of her time alone, feeling apathetic, with little desire to talk to anyone, let alone do the things I used to enjoy. I feel like I've become nothing more than a shadow—or a ghost—of the full and meaningful life I once had. I barely recognize myself anymore, even physically. When I look in the mirror and see tired, almost lifeless eyes, exhausted from the lack of good-quality sleep, it's unbearable. So I truly understand how you feel. It's terribly unfair.

I sincerely hope you'll tell someone you trust or a healthcare professional how overwhelming your suicidal thoughts have become. You shouldn't have to carry this burden alone. Thank you for sharing your story with me. From the bottom of my heart, I hope that one day we'll both be able to look back on this as nothing more than the darkest chapter of our lives, rather than the ending
 
Brendan Clark said:
It's crazy to think Johnson & Johnson make more than 4 billion dollars on Invega sales, they value profit over health.
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Crazy to think that corporations that falsify the records like Eli Lilly and Jansen Pharmaceuticals makes money on our suffering, i dont know about others but might too... Jesus said to never lie and they lie that people with dementia autism and disabilities are needing antipsychotics, and also i see dopamine imbalance theory which what i was acussed of, supposedly it was genetics for these monsters in my case not beating abusive father despotic narcissistic lying manipulative mother and bullying me 11 yo sister when im a kid. These monsters traumatize already traumatised people the brain damage is the worst part of it. Inshallah these fools will face God judgment
 
But keep in mind that the most beautiful moment of my life was given by psychiatrist so its not that all pharmacology is bad, none of you would not been on this forum if you would be forced 25mg seroquel for 2 weeks even if you not needed it, there are situation where they can be helpful but enlightened psychiatrist know they can permanently damage someone that didnt needed even minimal dose cause cptsd is not schizophrenia right? Pregabalin is very helpful for me and im going to psychiatrist soon, does anyone knows which psychiatric pill is best for dopamine production? Strattera Xanax?
 
InnerReturn said:
I'm so sorry you're going through this. Reading your message, I can feel how much you've lost, and I understand why you're grieving the person you used to be. It sounds incredibly painful. I know it's hard to believe in recovery when you've been suffering for so long, and I won't pretend to know what your outcome will be. But I've seen people improve even after they thought nothing would ever change. That's one of the reasons I'm still trying to hold on myself. What you wrote about your life before all of this—your creativity, your home, your writing, your garden—it shows that those parts of you existed. Right now they may feel buried, but they are still part of who you are. I feel like my personality has changed too. I used to be a determined, confident, and outgoing girl who loved reading, spending time with friends, and astronomy. Now I've become someone who spends most of her time alone, feeling apathetic, with little desire to talk to anyone, let alone do the things I used to enjoy. I feel like I've become nothing more than a shadow—or a ghost—of the full and meaningful life I once had. I barely recognize myself anymore, even physically. When I look in the mirror and see tired, almost lifeless eyes, exhausted from the lack of good-quality sleep, it's unbearable. So I truly understand how you feel. It's terribly unfair.

I sincerely hope you'll tell someone you trust or a healthcare professional how overwhelming your suicidal thoughts have become. You shouldn't have to carry this burden alone. Thank you for sharing your story with me. From the bottom of my heart, I hope that one day we'll both be able to look back on this as nothing more than the darkest chapter of our lives, rather than the ending
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Your situation definitely sounds similar. I'm sorry you're also going through such suffering. Thank you for your kind words & encouragement. It means a lot. I also feel like a shadow or ghost of who I used to be, and look in the mirror & see tired, blackened eyes with slight bags from the severe lack of sleep for many months. Unfortunately, after trying natural remedies, then numerous lighter meds, I was forced to take, not one, but two antipsychotics (Seroquel & Caplyta) to get 6-7 hours of sleep. How will I ever get off these drugs now?!

I have told plenty of people about the suicidality. Nobody knows how to help me at this point. The practitioner prescribing the meds is pushing lithium now. Is there any reason to believe lithium could ameliorate any of my ills? I would surely love if we could connect down the road & both be recovered from these nightmares we've been enduring. Thank you again for your thoughtful & heartfelt message. Sincerely & gratefully, Dan
 
Chanel_monster said:
I wouldn't be surprised if the psychiatry's goal is to kill or drive people to commit suicide.
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Yeah, the real MONSTER is Big Pharma. But these psychiatrists are surely culpable too. I would love to torture the guy who did this to me. There was absolutely no justification for prescribing this extreme poison. I was slightly manic when I arrived at the hospital. Honestly, I didn't need anything at that point. But if anything, they should've given me a much more benign med. F'n Nazis!
 
KubiKook said:
Yeah, these Nazi docs should definitely be charged with crimes against humanity. Thanks for the empathy. Much appreciated.
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As totally healthy man i will sue them and speak about what they done to me by forcing me antipsychotics on 3 diff hosiutalization where each one was against the law cause i was not danger to myself or other, i dont see how i could lose it
 
YogirisingKundalini said:
As totally healthy man i will sue them and speak about what they done to me by forcing me antipsychotics on 3 diff hosiutalization where each one was against the law cause i was not danger to myself or other, i dont see how i could lose it
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I hope you're successful. Sadly, it doesn't change all the suffering they imposed. I also have a good case, I wasn't a danger, was totally compliant with their program, yada-yada. But they're
likely to manipulate the facts, somehow create a need for that poison. I didn't even have one session with the psychiatrist, nurse practitioner or therapist, before or after my court appearance.
Definitely malpractice & mistreatment. Those Mother-F**kers should be in jail for what they've done to me, and the hospital should be shut down. The judge should also be liable for collusion.
 
Is there a correlation between post psychotic depression and invega recovery? I had similar symptoms during my last episode afterwards and at roughly 9 months i suddenly snapped out of it, but the difference was I could still feel nicotine and anxiety.. does anyone here know anyone thats not had anxiety and still recovered because not being able to even feel anxiety or depression is very unnerving like a constant limbo of suffering.. what inprovements have people had whilst feeling like a zombie? Has anyone not fully recovered yet but no longer feels like a zombie?
 
Gdvffh said:
You guys believe in an afterlife?
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I used to be a steadfast believer in Christ, thought He was soon coming for His chosen ones, yada-yada. Now, I don't believe any of it, no Jesus, no soul or spirit, no afterlife. Sucks.
I used to tell my mom, who's an Atheist, her belief system is awful, being just gone when we die. F**k, I'm afraid of death again, like I was before I found my faith. How about you?
 
KubiKook said:
I used to be a steadfast believer in Christ, thought He was soon coming for His chosen ones, yada-yada. Now, I don't believe any of it, no Jesus, no soul or spirit, no afterlife. Sucks.
I used to tell my mom, who's an Atheist, her belief system is awful, being just gone when we die. F**k, I'm afraid of death again, like I was before I found my faith. How about you?
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Makes sense cause David Hawkins said suffering makes one drop in points of conciousness and atheism was calibrated low, yeah we wonder why God allowed such hell to us, its really demonic to steal someone health just like that on false diagnosis, i still believe in God despite that hoping he will help me create biggest psychiatric expose ever done in this Universe. Inshallah
 
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