@zack365: the numb feeling in muscles is the lack of strength and way better than the lead feeling. your muscles have just been tight for so long. keep the workout routine up but if you feel something off even for one second don't give up, just ease back the routine a lil bit. very important to listen to your body right now. 3 windows? you going for a record?! haha. good for you. i look forward to reading your full recovery post soon.
remember you include in your posts the number of days for a reason. try going back and charting your physical strength, i think you might be pleasantly surprised with the pattern.
nice on the games. i'm going to someone's house and we'll split the cost for red dead 2, they have some time off work and i need to get my video game fix on.
@awesome31311: you have ran out of ways to say how the poison ruined your life? really?! i'm just playing, that's a good sign your accepting what your going through and will make this much easier than fighting it all the way. i fought it for the first year or two i was off of it. things got better after i stopped deluding myself about my situation as well as recovery and started working at healing. from your post it sounds like the pacitane is what gave you the stoned feeling with open mouth and eyes wide open; kinda sounds like when people take benadryl with diphenhydramine in it. either way no biggie, just keep at it for a few days, notice what changes and keep updating us as to how it works out for you. btw LSD might be effective after 9 months, i only talked to one person who took it and they said wait longer than you think. good advice you dropped on us btw.
@Helaed: coming back and posting some more, very cool. you are much stronger than i am, you went through a few rounds of the poison in 7 years and still kicking. thanks for your supportive words and especially for sharing your story with us. are you still taking red sage? is it helping?
@SkavrsXeplion: i did a mad amount of drugs in the first few years off the poison trying to see what would be the antidote, nothing. my pupils only dilated twice and it was two different times and completely random. i really don't like my senses being messed with and xeplion was the worse at that. i even bought 3 pairs of sunglasses to keep in various places cause of how sensitive my eyes became to light (my skin would burn in direct sunlight too, like searing pain). between the poison, rude neighbors and different sleeping times i was wearing sun glasses for a year or two straight, i got a lot of weird looks. blurry vision, constricted pupils, sensitivity to sun light, focus was only in two modes - near and far and a few other things. my eyes are fine, so is everyone else who healed. yours will be too. that and what Epmty1128 said is completely true, he nailed it. how did the party go?
@Nvegasux: preaching to the choir teach. i have my mental dysfunction and because of it, it kicked on that part of my brain that houses the 6th sense so i can get through life easier. i would've been in contact with that aspect of my life more than most anyway cause it runs strong on one side of my family but my dysfunction kicked it into overdrive. same dysfunction also doesn't allow me to use it like the rest of you to so many degrees but good thing your learning about it. it was one of the things i pushed myself on during the healing process to learn about cause it interested me and i learned more with the time i had to kill. i do the practical using of it know that i'm healed.
those appointments are not to intentionally piss you off. what they are doing is going about something in the only way they know how and i agree it's mostly the wrong way. they think they are exploring your mind but they really aren't. they need to teach you how to first cause that's their job and what they're there for. next time you feel pissed off, ask them a social question. "crazy weather we've been having lately?" something mundane and to bring it back to two people in a room just talking. it takes the clinical edge off of them that they use to protect themselves. it's also the end goal, one way psychiatric community knows someone is "good" is they are effective in regular conversation, the mental in depth stuff comes few and far between for a reason both in life and in their office. just relax and get back to small things. it helps.
@Yeshuah: i am more disconnected from the light than most people are, it kinda got me use to my trial with the poison. i can see the light a lot more than i use to though. go slow with your metaphysical self when you are healed. don't want to burn out from it. it will be fresh, like new again and just take time to get use to it; just enjoy it when you get there. remember life is a balance, a road and is better in moderation.
@Neuroleptiqu33: are you sure your using the canabis right?! maybe your doing it wrong and that's why you can't feel it?! i'm joking, it will come back after your first window for a day or two but then you wont feel it again until 9-12 months. you will enjoy it again all the time when you are healed, focus on healing to get you there. ( i wasted a lot of money on smoking trying to feel it again, not worth it.)
@LifeAfterInvega: becoming a veteran of the psychiatric community already i see. bipolar 1 huh? how's that working out for you? (i've had lots of bipolar experience with other people, even two family members. it could be worse.) good to hear you got them to see eye to eye on the med part for now, great work. now you do you and get back to better things.
@Gdvffh: i almost forgot, thank you for sharing your story with everyone. i got to learn a lil more about you this time and i can relate that much more now. the quiet part is unsettling but part and parcel with what to experience as you know from before. it gets old but good news is it's not forever right?! haha, yes, life is a bitch. i can relate on that more than you know or would feel comfortable with. (i laugh cause of self deprecating and dark humor. laughing with you not at you.) hopefully you can get to live in that other country soon, who knows, maybe your first trial made it so you can heal faster. i will be looking forward to your progress with interest.
@CurtisO: question: is it Curtis and then the letter "o" or the number zero? good question, meditation does come back again, so do the deep thoughts. for me it wasn't until i was close to the very end but i'm a negative exception. some say once your fully healed, some when you are close to being fully healed. we are all different and heal in different rates and in different ways. give it another 4 months and see if you can tell a difference then let us know.
@lexman53: the combination of abilify and invega is rough but not the first person to go through it and fully heal. if your about %75 now then being patient and taking it one day at a time is all you can do. your pretty close as it is. how is the scared feeling? has the anhedonai and insomnia gotten better? (you actually sound a lil better than your last post, especially with the mojis) hang in there.
