Hi everyone and thanks for caring.
I am good and yes the withdrawals werent delayed they just weren't at all as rough as cold turkeying 1/5 part use.
Could it be that as you go through many time over your life through withdrawals you just know what to expect and can be ready for them and therefore the first ones are the worst as there are antipacitory anxiety involved?
After a week and few days of abundance only it is quite stupid to say that I won't touch those stupid opiates anymore as I know I will be tempted to try sometime in my life and hope I have strength to stay away.
Opiates have always been in my adult life some kind of a bad "life vest" in situations I can't or don't wan't to deal and want to pretend that everything is allright. I don't want to stress normal psychologists with my problems as they would have to go through therapy by themselves after giving therapy for me
The bad part in quite short lived opiates (or was it opioids, if you want to include synthetic ones too) is that if you take your dose at the evening you can work as you would normally do and no one notices, except other users. You don't get hangover as you would get from some other substances and 4-6hours half-life makes sure you are not under the influence enough that you would look like being under the influence.
God damnit. Germans were quite geniuses in developing synthetic opi's at the end of 1920s and during 1930s and at the start of 1940s since their supplies of opium was getting lower and lower.
I remember oxycodone being intruduced to Hitler as a miraculous combat drug which could bring back a soldier to fight even if he would have taken a bullet and as a reason only SS forces and some essential Luftwaffe staff were given this drug.
First time I got a shot of oxycodone by a field medic in Afghanistan (As a peacekeeper, not as fighting force and that kind of situations were rare for us) and I actually felt I could fight and I did although I had broken my knee (maybe mostly because I pulled the knee joint back in place so I could walk. Bad idea I know) and some parts of my spine due driving into IED and then getting ambushed. I just yelled that medic to give me another shot and let me cover his arse while he treats others.
It was a weird feeling as at the same time you were relaxed but still motivated and energized. Well until the nods came out after two hours or so and we had already cleared the situation.
If anyone is interested, take a look what started my pains in knee and spinal cord.
http://m.liveleak.com/view?i=2f1_1368917079
I'm the guy that yells loudiest
(wussy, well had to get that through radio
)
That all happened because we were mistaken as Americans. Well I actually got the one who triggered the bomb in my sights but couldn't pull the trigger as he looked like 10-12 years old through zoom and was running away and therefore not a threat anymore and I still couldn't shot a child in any case either.
Anyway being in a Finnish Rapid Deployment Forces and therefore to become a peacekeeper means that you go through 12 months of "normal" training and also FRDF training too.
I heard from American soldiers that they send their soldiers to the field situations after 4months of training which is even 2 months less that the lowest amount of service each Finnish male had to go through (of course there are Civilian service for those not interested using weapons for a reason or another. I don't despise those 5-10 % who go through that).
Also I heard that they send 18 years old guys in a situations like Afganistan and Iraq?
Some interesting stuff to look if you are into military.
http://m.liveleak.com/view?i=2ed_1353497133
Spoken as Finnish but has English Subtitles
Stupidly named by someone as it is about special training Rapid Deployment Forces receives even during their normal 12 month training and after that and not Finland making war in Afghanistan as we were there preventing war, not making one and on UN mandate building schools and dispensing food and water for civilians.
