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Come away with me..

Pomplemous

Bluelighter
Joined
Jun 22, 2004
Messages
3,791
Location
Hampshire
Let me take you somewhere for the day
It's really not that far away.
Put your pain into my hands
And follow me into another land.
I want for you to understand
There's more to life than this.
I know you're scared, but follow me
You can rest your weary heart on me
And we'll spend the day together peacefully.

So we step into my world
You see the Sun and you smile
For the first time in a while.
You close your eyes and fill your senses,
Feeling the wind blowing through your hair
Ruffling the cobwebs of your despair.

We'll follow the path signposted 'Love'
The Sun beams down on us from above -
Warming the chill that's grown in your heart
And that feeling is just the start.

Do you hear the birds singing their welcome?.....

I hear you laugh
As the flowers seem to bow down as we pass
And the sheep gather to watch us en mass
As they gorge themselves on the greenest of grass.
And as we pass the trees, they rustle their leaves
In greeting to us.

How do you feel? I ask.

We stop by the side of the soft meadowlands
And take your pain into our hands
And release it into the sky
Like releasing a butterfly.
And as we watch it buffeted by the wind
We say goodbye to fear and hate and pain
And say hello to Happiness again.

So I wanted to bring you here to show you
That all is not lost in life -
Because for all the pain that's made you sad
There's so much more love to be had.
And so if you can take my hand and trust in me
I can lead you away from your misery.
 
This should not have been on page 2 with 7 views!! I like the imagery and the rithm a lot. I liked this paragraph especially:

<<
I hear you laugh
As the flowers seem to bow down as we pass
And the sheep gather to watch us en mass
As they gorge themselves on the greenest of grass.
And as we pass the trees, they rustle their leaves
In greeting to us.
>>

I like the step how 1st and next to last are the only ones not rhyming with the rest. Made me smile. Good work!!




skjalff
 
^^Geez thanks for the bump!!!!

Pomplemous: the more I read your work the more I like it, this made me feel so good. Really positive!

=D
 
skjalff said:
This should not have been on page 2 with 7 views!! I like the imagery and the rithm a lot. I liked this paragraph especially:

<<
I hear you laugh
As the flowers seem to bow down as we pass
And the sheep gather to watch us en mass
As they gorge themselves on the greenest of grass.
And as we pass the trees, they rustle their leaves
In greeting to us.
>>

I like the step how 1st and next to last are the only ones not rhyming with the rest. Made me smile. Good work!!

skjalff

hoped the rythmn would carry the rhyme from grass to pass then switch rhyme from trees to leaves, then have the us part to keep the s sound
tenuous! haha
who am i kidding, no such thought went into it.

thank you for resurrecting it from page 2 - but I dont mind if no one reads it, there is alot to choose from on here - but i like it when people do.
 
Dastrix Slogan said:
^^Geez thanks for the bump!!!!

Pomplemous: the more I read your work the more I like it, this made me feel so good. Really positive!

=D

I am happy it made you feel good because there's no particular person I am talking to when I write, so if it fits you, then its you I'm talking to.
 
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