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Opioids Cold Turkey Methadone After 2 months at 90mg

Good luck, knew someone who quit cold turkey from 200mg and was in hell for months on end, but made it, now is always stuggling to hold on to there roxis for the month(really does need them for pain,but after being on that dose of Done' for 10 years....wtf is 90mg of oxy going to do,imo??no wonder they have problems not running out!) I am on Subs myself, usually 6-8mg a day, maybe you should try to taper with Subs, or switch to Subs, whichever...My doctor is wanting to taper me starting my next visit but I really do not want to, maybe I should just tell the doctor that...but good luck! Look into Kratom also for a confort med! Have read from both people on Done' and Subs that it helped..
 
I think I have been lucky because of my short duration of use. My WD hasn't been nearly as intense as some describe, and my GI issues are already clearing up nicely. I'm still a little nauseated in the mornings but some Pepto Bismol and I'm good to go. The fatigue is really the unbearable part. I can do simple things for myself and yesterday I even attempted a walk (which drained every remaining ounce of energy from my body and was a BAD idea.) The problem is I'm trying to do too much too soon, because I'm tired of being trapped in the house, because I feel like I should be doing things to make this move more quickly, because my dad makes me feel like a lazy asshole for spending all day either laying or sitting down... None of these things will make it go any faster, I know. I plan to take it easy from here until I actually can go on a short walk without feeling like I ran a marathon. Sidenote: still very emotional, but the beginning of the walk yesterday was beautiful and I literally felt like someone whose life had been in black and white with a world suddenly turned to color. Everything was beautiful. Plus I have a libido again (which is weird, bc it's been a while since I cared about sex or sexuality...) Masturbation is the most wonderful little boost haha. That probably goes without saying. I went from not being able to orgasm at all (and not wanting to anyway) to getting off in a matter of 30 seconds. Can I keep this part? Lol.
 
Forgot to mention Subs aren't an option either. :( I don't particularly like them anyway (I have used them to detox from dope before) but because of my insurance plan I am not covered to see any sub doctors. I can see the same doctor for anything but Suboxone and be covered, but for a sub visit it's "out of network???" and most charge a couple hundred for the visit alone, plus for just 8mg/day it's about $400 at the pharmacy per month. I might as well be on dope for that money. I don't have it and neither do my parents. I know there are easier ways to do what I'm doing but I also feel so fortunate just to have that Klonopin and pot. Some people above did it with no help. I have a nice dose of a good benzo keeping me sane. I have optimism that I'm going to be ok.
 
Fucked up. Took a bunch of codeine that wasn't mine (660mg, unnoticed, thusfar) and of course that amount removed WD symptoms and lifted my mood but was in no way a high, plus the histamine release is nearly unbearable at first. Then I snatched 14 of my own Kpins out of a locked cabinet (crafty crafty) for minor binge use (4-5mg at a time, also unnoticed until refill time.) Then I went to an Urgent Care for a severe respiratory infection and fever (on top of Done WD) and got myself a month's worth of Soma. SMART GIRL. Feeling very junkie accomplished, nice and relaxed too, but all too aware of a reemerging pattern. I just want to wake up one day, not sick. I keep pushing and my body pushes back. I'm as tired as I've ever been. Today is exactly week three? Give or take a day? Definitely not over yet, and the cravings are just beginning. Cravings so rough they push me to tears. Wouldn't recommend methadone.
 
Still have a fever. Horribly sick. Lied my way to an urgent care, could give two fucks about antibiotics or whatever, was just hoping for an opiate. Left with 20 10mg hydrocodone. I know I'll barely feel a thing even taking the whole bottle at once with a CWE (FUCKING METHADONE) but I don't have the willpower to hold onto them until I would. I'm just hoping for a little itch and a little sedation. My mom found two somas (my god why am I such a clumsy addict) and flushed them. Yay. They would've been great to potentiate that hydro. Maybe a couple extra Klonopin will kick it into full gear. My addict brain is in full swing. I am Dr. Jekyll and I am Mr. Hyde. A fucking lunatic. Oh yeah then some lady asked if I was homeless and needed food or money (which gave me my second laugh of the day, the first being as I exited the urgent care with a script in my hand.) I wish I could be this inspiration, this beacon of hope, but the truth is all my crazy has come back times two. All I want is to be numb.

Sidenote: Norcos are so nice and easy to crush, like they were meant to be cold water extracted lol. Crushing Tylenol 3 is like trying to make it through a marathon with none of the reward. I will admit to have actually acquired a taste for those bitter T3's though. I licked my pestle (that's how I crush em) and it gave me shivers. Did the same thing with Norco and it was like licking a lemon. Should be fun to drink,.
 
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So this will be my last post on this topic, as today I am officially a month out and feeling pretty damn good. Mood has improved, symptoms nearly gone, energy is returning, etc. Obviously the cravings are back (had a drug dream last night in fact, someone offered me a loaded syringe but I wouldn't take it because I was afraid it was used so I picked up the dope and a clean syringe and then every bathroom was occupied lol. Worst drug dream ever.) but if I can continue to take steps forward as I have been (working out again, eating healthier, interacting socially) I know those cravings will lessen, and if/when I slip, I just have to reapply myself. As everyone before me so wisely pointed out, the worst part of methadone WD is the length of the symptoms. I also hated waking up nauseated and vomiting. That part didn't last so long though. I'd recommend a months worth of a good benzo, some vitamins, pot, pepto bismol (or promethazine if nausea is really bad) and immodium for the symptoms, as those surely eased the process. And for anyone considering methadone, weigh the pros and cons carefully. Someday you may have to or want to come off of it. Tapering can be painful too, and cold turkey is debilitating for a good three weeks AT LEAST. But it can also save lives, so I hope no one takes this as me being anti-done. It just didn't work for me. If you're in the midst of withdrawals just remind yourself that it will pass. There are moments you think you might have fucked yourself permanently. Not true. It goes away, only at a glacial speed.
 
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