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Ex-Bluelighter
Scattered feet shuffle thru piles of brittle crumpled leaves some shining bright with veins of color some tattered and dull as the grey sidewalk they swirl upon. My brain is floating somewhere over my head. Caught in a vice-grip of insane immaturity. I cant bring myself to do as I please. Lied and corrupted my senses are blurred from handfuls of pills, piles of powders, and liquid anti-depressants. I should read the street signs more carefully as I trip over a cracked sidewalk square.
The freshly poured piece of concrete so clean and beautiful but has a stomach turning fracture. It might be patchable but forever that square will be marred in its beauty. My tears drip trying to fill the gap but its no use. I am already stuck in a world of fleeting grace disturbed by my own insecurities. I stare at that sidewalk square and revel in the peace of mind I have been graced with in a window of time so slim and square. I should have pushed the rubbery elasticity of time with all my might for a chance to experience what? A trip on a chance for a smile? A stumble and spiral into the darkness? Instead I crumble back into myself.
Return to my nature of familiarity sitting on the corner stone[d]. Please don't confront me with my failures, I had not forgotten them but I have stopped my dreaming.
The freshly poured piece of concrete so clean and beautiful but has a stomach turning fracture. It might be patchable but forever that square will be marred in its beauty. My tears drip trying to fill the gap but its no use. I am already stuck in a world of fleeting grace disturbed by my own insecurities. I stare at that sidewalk square and revel in the peace of mind I have been graced with in a window of time so slim and square. I should have pushed the rubbery elasticity of time with all my might for a chance to experience what? A trip on a chance for a smile? A stumble and spiral into the darkness? Instead I crumble back into myself.
Return to my nature of familiarity sitting on the corner stone[d]. Please don't confront me with my failures, I had not forgotten them but I have stopped my dreaming.
