Another window opens,
the season's upon us when
her commitment
becomes but a guise,
when she can't make up
her mind again.
She comes to me, throwing little
whisper-notes in the dark across her
bridge of ambivalence,
flirting with my primitive desire to take advantage
of her hidden indecision.
I plead:
Don't tempt me.
But she has already.
So much for my
ever rock-solid, noble resistance:
I find the ethical ground I stand on is
crumbling in my growing desperation,
a primal hunger drawing vitality
from my inhibitions, which, even in their weakness,
still struggle to quell the madness.
She would be just an object,
a transitory one at that,
but I sense it seems to matter
little to her, if it means
anything at all.
Almost begging me to
use and abuse her vulnerability,
I'm weighing benefits and potential losses,
counting the pros and cons,
knowing all the while that
I'm just stalling, knowing that its
all just a clever diversion:
I'm just buying time till the
season passes,
just buying time till the
window's closed,
hoping my impulse won't leap up
and jump through
and leave us in the free-fall
of betrayal.
the season's upon us when
her commitment
becomes but a guise,
when she can't make up
her mind again.
She comes to me, throwing little
whisper-notes in the dark across her
bridge of ambivalence,
flirting with my primitive desire to take advantage
of her hidden indecision.
I plead:
Don't tempt me.
But she has already.
So much for my
ever rock-solid, noble resistance:
I find the ethical ground I stand on is
crumbling in my growing desperation,
a primal hunger drawing vitality
from my inhibitions, which, even in their weakness,
still struggle to quell the madness.
She would be just an object,
a transitory one at that,
but I sense it seems to matter
little to her, if it means
anything at all.
Almost begging me to
use and abuse her vulnerability,
I'm weighing benefits and potential losses,
counting the pros and cons,
knowing all the while that
I'm just stalling, knowing that its
all just a clever diversion:
I'm just buying time till the
season passes,
just buying time till the
window's closed,
hoping my impulse won't leap up
and jump through
and leave us in the free-fall
of betrayal.
