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Choking/asphyxiation during sex?

MzFluffy said:
I've never had the courage to be a dominant person in bed. I always feel over powered by anyone that i've ever had sex with.

Well if you get panic attacks from it, it's a good thing that you don't. I mean it's not for everyone. If it's going to cause you any discomfort, you should never do it :)
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About the panic attacks - yep, screw with my breathing and I get hostile and reactionary. Not good for sex at all.

About my dominant tendencies - mostly they involve telling the guy what to do, I've never physically overpowered anyone, but I know how to put extreme and prolonged psychological pressure on. The experience with the topic of this thread I had was really limited, neither of us knew what we were doing except that if we started choking to let up, as I recall we were kissing really hard and he guided my hand to his collarbone area. It gravitated to his neck. I applied pressure, not a lot, just to see what he would do. He enjoyed it... but it wasn't a major part of the night's play.

:)

exarkann - I'll try to find you some links on safe(r) asphyxiation play. Not quite sure where to look, but my friend who is into it who I had the nonsexual experience with could probably point me into a direction. I do know that it is covered in most basic BDSM texts, at least to a degree... yet I cannot find a text that is primarily about harm reduction, and I hesitate to recommend them on that ground. These texts are available over discriminating Google and Amazon searches.

However, without reservation - I will recommend Exit to Eden by Anne Rice, may be indexed under her pseudonym Anne Rampling. It is fiction, but no vampires as is characteristic of the author, very well done and sensual fiction, a BDSM novel beautifully told and a love story.

Be safe, everyone - NO ORGASM, no amount of getting off, is worth dying over. Asphyxiation is a risky activity that should be entered into only in trusting relationships with set boundaries, between individuals with responsibility and accountability toward one another.

<3
 
... and that what we are trying to find out.

MzFluffy, do you actually have your airway constricted? or is it just the blood flow?
i'm assuming its the airway, since you say its about controlling your breathing, but we both find that the closing of the throat is quite uncomfortable, to the point of distraction from enjoyment of sex...
 
MzFluffy said:
That is what i'm talking about!!!

See you know what's going on ;).
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But of course, m'dear!!


Caitlin - Sowwie ;) 0=)


exarkann - with me it's a slight constriction of breathing.. not so much that i am turning blue.. but enough to feel like someone is in control of your next move...
 
i hate being dominated in any way... shape... or form... it makes me get very hostile very quick... a girl actually tried it with me once and... yeah... it dident turn out well

altho... im very dominate...
 
MzFluffy said:
.....I don't know about other women, but when i'm to the point of near orgasm I find the harder and rougher the person continues to be with me, the better I get off. I can't have some guy be rough with me, and then just slow down right before I cum. Having him add to the roughness by putting his hands around my neck, and making it even more intense than it was before is what makes it great. That little loss of air that contributes to the abnormal breathing from having sex is just heaven x100000

.....It's just something that can really turn me on. I love the fact that you can be with someone that's dominant, and comfortable enough to be in that situation with you. Plus the feeling itself is like a rush. If you're having rough sex, and a guy just grabs your neck from behind, it's great! Feeling him take control like that can put you over the edge.
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Doesnt anyone find these posts hot and sexy?
I could imagine doing that to MzFluffy ;)
*reaches for MzFluffy's neck*
 
MzFluffy said:
I always find that it's the bigger more dominant looking men that want be the be submissive one in bed lol. It's cute in a way haha.
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I find people are the opposite in bed. When I was really submissive in general (IE, let people set over me, more peace-nic, didn't ever tell anyone off when they deserved it, etc.) I was very dominate in bed. As I have grown more balls in real life I have become more and more submissive in bed. I don't know which came first. I find each one has their own appeal to me and I tend to have phases where I perfer one over the other. I was really into being dominate and sort of harsh for about 7 months or so and recently just switched to being the submissive and A hard submissive at that.

I may have starting to switch when I was fooling around with my than gf and we were both stoned. Meaning I said more harcore stuff thinking it would turn her on more and instead she whimpererd and said it was mean. I hate hurting people for real, so it sullied it alitte. Now she is stressed and being dom helps her and I sort of have always loved the pain/sex combo. (I did it to myself when I was in high school, but had forgotten until she was dom for consistent basis and I enjoyed it).

BUT...back to topic...It doesn't interest me but I'd give it a try. I think It would be harder for me to do.
 
I always find that it's the bigger more dominant looking men that want be the be submissive one in bed lol. It's cute in a way haha.
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Submissive men are a real turn off for me. Theres nothing more sexy than a sexually confident strong man. The choking thing- that is a turn on for me, to be choked rather than be the choker.
 
MzFluffy said:
Haha I hear what you're saying. I'm small too, and I don't know how to put the hurt on someone.
.
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Word. Fluff you're around 5'9 right? Imagine me, 5'2 and a half with a guy who is 6 feet talll or over and thats what Im saying when I say I just LOVE being thrown around and manhandled during sex =D (only with my S.O. of course) I cant get it on with a man who is submissive in the bedroom...thank God i've lucked out in that department anyway ever since. Lol.

I used to have ashthma and I cant really stand anything on my neck so the choking thing is out...but I DO love getting chased around the house and being fucked breathless lol 8(
 
It's funny, because i am pretty dominant in general.... but i really hate submissive guys. My last bf was such a pussy in bed.. i hated it. It's okay to want me to take charge and believe me - I will and you will get the hurt! (lol) but seriously for someone who is whinne whine and cooing, and laying there and acting like a punk who doesn't know how to fuck a girls brains out ... ..

id rather go masturbate by myself.. shit.
 
Playing devil's advocate...

...I found a couple of articles online here which I thought were interesting.

Personally, I like breath control in the sense of breathing air from my partner's mouth but I've got some nasty associations with being strangled from an incident when I was a kid so I tend to panic and schitz out if someone puts anything around my throat..

If you are going to get into asphyxiophilia, just be really careful and aware of what you're doing, eh. As other people have pointed out, dying to get off is pretty stupid and counter-productive...and if you are going to choke someone, suffocation is relatively safer than strangulation. Strangulation constricts the flow of blood to your brain and can cause brain damage or can kill you more quickly if something fucks up.

Whatever y'all are into, stay safe muh peeps! :D
 
when i first heard of this being done (excluding old michael hutchence) i freaked. no way you could get off on being choked.

guess i've change a little since then. girl on top with her hands around his neck (light pressure on jugulars) makes moe lose it.

i think im just a sick fuck though
 
I like being choked during sex. I like the intensity of the orgasm. My fiance applies the right amount of pressure upon request.

Choking is not something I want every time. Like an ass slap or a hair pull, it should be used occasionally during sex. Otherwise it wouldn't do it for me anymore.

My man is not into being choked which pleases me. I have done it before for someone. It made me feel uncomfortable. It made me nervous to think I could accidentally hurt him. It wasn't erotic for me to be the giver.

I am in control of myself outside the bedroom. My dominating tendencies stop there.
 
I have never done this, but am extremely curious. I've just never had the element of trust needed in previous relationships to suggest it. I would definitely enjoy being the receiver, but I think I would enjoy choking in certain situations (I am definitely more submissive in bed, but do enjoy a role-reversal once in a while).

Since I usually hold my breath to achieve orgasm, I'm sure not having control over my breathing once in a while would make it absolutely fantastic! Plus, I just like to be manhandled, spanked a little, bitten, tied up, blindfolded, held down, and have my hair pulled. Not all at once, of course. :)

As long as both parties are completely trusting of one another and do what it takes to ensure their partner's safety, I see no problem with it at all. Yeah, it might be a little twisted, but that's what makes it so hot!
 
ive had expereince with that, and to me it's cool for a few reasons. first off its a dazzling display of trust on the part of the chokeee, so you really need to have some sort of tight relationship to do it and have it "work" imho. secondly, there is some weird nexus between pleasure and pain....and playing with that line a bit can be fun. im not sure i would enjoy being choked much, but a bit of choking, slapping, biting, pinching, scratching, spanking or what have you, during sex, is fun...it spices things up a bit at least.
 
holy crap you've used a ballbag?- ha
- i once did some choking unintentionally, kind of cupping my hand around her neck, getting a slight bit tighter the closer i came to cumming... once i looked back on it, i thought it was sexy as hell..
- choking while dragging my toungue up 'n down her neck.. mmm
i'd like to try it again, seriously
 
Hypoxyphilliacs!

All of you who enjoy the act of intentionally depriving oneself of oxygen during orgasm (whether it be purely autoerotic, or done to you by a partner, or both) please make yeselves heard :) .
I'm interested to see how common this is.
I for one happen to really enjoy it, and use a nice big woolen scarf for these purposes - one end gripped in my teeth, wrapped around the neck, and very pulled tight by a arm works well, and leaves little marks or bruising.
I'm only experienced with the autoerotic side of it so far; need to proposition to a sex partner willing to do such a thing, hopefully soon :) .

Oh, might as well extend the scope of this by saying one doesn't necessarily have to have a genuine /fetish/ for this - just interested in it. I personally am just open-minded, not having any sort of strong attachment to the idea of it etc, despite the title of the threah heh :) .
 
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