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Chicago Heroin v. Please refrain from offing yourself.

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Thanks GT123 and Mr Scag. Sorry didnt specify but yeah, I have priors. (Nothing scummy though) What freaked me out was how high they were setting the bond for everybody! $25., $50., $70.,! $50.000 in my case(for a dub)But my only reference point is the brothers at County who were like "Shit man, one bag? They're gonna throw that shit out" But it's a class 4 felony so I didn't want to chance it and finally broke down and called a lawyer yest. with whats left of my money. Fucking house arrest sucks! Being at home was boring before but it's even more boring when you can't leave! LOL! GT123, I don't know how you did that for 3 months! Im only into my second week. My second day I snagged the the bracelet on the stairs and fucking popped the clip (it was an accident...I swear!!) and the sheriff had to come out and clip a new one on LOL! They were like "Stop fucking with our equip." LOL!
My own stupidity, I was going from tip to tip seeng who's got the best bags...It's like you get comfortable with a spot and then you feel normal being in the hood like you can casually stroll down the block like you live there. I had one cop drive by and yell "You stick out like a turd in the toilet bowl!!!"(me being white) LOL! I should have listened!!
In the interest of harm reduction "Don't get complacent"
Once again thanks for the replys
Peace guys.
 
On a lighter note, While I was in the bullpen(it's like no room to move crowded!) there was one brother that just couldn't stay up he was sleeping the whole entire time, exept when he suddenly jumps up and starts running and jumping over people to get to that nasty toilet that some guy basically had his face against sleeping and without saying anything just took the most juicy shit right over the guys head and splashed him with the nasty!!! The brother on the bottom was like "Damn Jo thats rude..." over and over again as he casually and slowly gets up and walks away...The dude that took a shit basically on the dudes head just casually cuddled up next to the toilet where the other guy was at and went back to sleep like nothing happened!!!!
"DAMN JO, THAT'S RUDE"!!! HAHAHAHA!!
Fuck house arrest!!!...but it could be worse...Somebody could be shitting on your head while you are sleeping!! LMAO!
"Daaaamn Jo, that's ruuuude...." LOL!
 
Thnx chefman and tommyboy. Man I just could not stop! Kept saying oh I can quit tmw or just one more. For me it's I have to hit rock bottom to get clean unfortunatly and next time my rock bottom will be death and that scares me a ton... I did go to dr months prior and I did stop on right arm so it would of cleared my left arm up but the addiction was too powerful then and I believe I was addicted to shooting up and the ritual was well. But that first night in treatment going thru the worst withdrawal I finally said I give up and am powerless and need help. Thank the spirits for picking me up and suboxone was a miracle drug and wish I gave it a chance a while ago. Ridingthebrownline congrats on being on and being clean. To all one step / day at a time... Now that I am out going to meetings and talking to new people seems like life is falling back into place. For those still in the daily grind my thoughts r with you...
 
well,my thought and prayers are with you too,Your doing a good job,man stick with it,and never forget what u have lost and how u felt that day.
 
Yep, have been reading your posts for a whlile good luck with the job search. Happy youre good. Basically it's about places, people and things that you have to watch out for.
I drive a truck around Chicago as a job that takes me to or through some shit or vacinity of the places I used to go to cop and associate it with a good time. The thing that always fucks me up is the thought that I'm somehow special and diff. from everyone else in terms of my addiction. Like I don't fucking panhandle or whatever...you know what I mean...
And then fucking two weeks later I'm getting fucked up in an alley on the west side with some homeless person(I don't call anybody a bum) hence my latest house arrest predictement.
What part of the city is the halfway house on?
 
Had to go back and read what actually happened. WOW MAN! That's really messed up. I sniff that shit so I don't know how hard/easy it is to mess yourself up with a spike. But there were alot of times when I would be walking through the hood and asking people for rigs and luckily it took them too long to get it so I just left. One time a buddy of mine was quiting and I asked him for his rigs and fucking shot up a few clonipin(didn't do shit) It was amazing how fucking good I was at it like a natural.That scared the shit out of me. But anyway, reading your earlier posts I am trully from the bottom of my heart happy to hear you are sounding/feeling better. I don't know how I would have dealt with something like that but we are resilient, you know what I mean. You'll find alot of decent people at meetings it's just like anything else you get what you put into it. I had alot of people trying to help me when I was going to meetings but I just could not wrap my mind around the concept of being sober because being under the influence of something is all I knew. I'm on house arrest now and it gave me a chance to clean up and shit so I'm kind of looking at stuff diff. One day/min./sec. at a time...whatever it takes man. Best to you and yours, take care man.
 
@Itchy,
Yeah bro, 3 months was really tough. You really have to find things to keep yourself busy. Especially exercise. The first month I did nothing but lay on the couch and watch t.v., eat and sleep and I started to gain a lot of weight. Really, there was no way I was exercising that first month because I was having super wd's from going cold turkey aftet a 15 to 20 bag a day habit. But after that first month I wrote out a 1 hr a day exercise routine and stuck with it everyday and not only did it help keep me in shape bit it helped with the post acute withdrawal. And definitely get an attorney, you don't wanna walk into court without one. Especially with a case for only one dub, you'll have a better chance of getting it thrown out with an attorney. Good luck man and hang in there, if you keep busy it'll go by pretty quick. On another note, I was clean for over 3 months and broke down and went and bought 2 bags, I did them and even though it felt so good necause my tolerance was so low, the mext day I was really mad and realized that it wasn't worth it and that I enjoyed being sober, especially since I don't have to worry about suboxone or methadone. So now i'm a week clean again and syaryed going to 12 step meetings and i'm thinking this is really it this time. I just enjoy being sober and how much easier living life is when i don't have to worry about how when and where I'm going to get my next fix. And not having to worry about drug tests at work. Anyways, I hope everyone else is doing well.
CHEERS!
 
Thnx for the kind words yeah using vs not is crazy different and start back at work Monday. Nervous and excited. Will be good to start saving money again... And it's key to keep going to meetings to be reminded of the gift of being clean... Now one day hope to meet a girl again...
 
I hear you man. Thanks for the encouriging words. I've been in that same place where I'm like "this is it, never again..." but then sometime later I get complacent about what actually made me quit in the first place and then I'm like "I learned from my last mistake and I'm gonna get high differentely now and that won't happen again" and then BAM! Next I'm calling in sick to work and you probably know the rest. The last couple times I got high landed me straight in the hospital(half the time on the other side of Chicago and I don't even drive[don't know how I got there]) The very last time was in Cook County Jail. So as far as staying sober right now I'm all out of options cause of house arrest and my G/F won't even get me a beer! For Shame!! LOL!
From my experience in trying to stay sober, my advice to anyone(funny coming from a person not bent on sobriety)is to remember why you got or tried to get sober in the first place and always keep it in perspective. Slip-ups happen but IMO big diff. between a slip-up and a relapse. Yeah, I hate having this tether on my leg but at least it keeps me from doing stupid shit...(God that's pathetic that that's what it takes)LOL! Yeah man I got a lawyer. Gave me a break $2.500 for the whole case and $1.500 if it gets dropped at preliminary. Thanks man, later. Be good peeps.
 
itchyscratchy said:
On a lighter note, While I was in the bullpen(it's like no room to move crowded!) there was one brother that just couldn't stay up he was sleeping the whole entire time, exept when he suddenly jumps up and starts running and jumping over people to get to that nasty toilet that some guy basically had his face against sleeping and without saying anything just took the most juicy shit right over the guys head and splashed him with the nasty!!! The brother on the bottom was like "Damn Jo thats rude..." over and over again as he casually and slowly gets up and walks away...The dude that took a shit basically on the dudes head just casually cuddled up next to the toilet where the other guy was at and went back to sleep like nothing happened!!!!
"DAMN JO, THAT'S RUDE"!!! HAHAHAHA!!
Fuck house arrest!!!...but it could be worse...Somebody could be shitting on your head while you are sleeping!! LMAO!
"Daaaamn Jo, that's ruuuude...." LOL!
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That's nasty.. who the fuck sleeps by the toilet bowel.. guy must be a boo.
Last time I was in, my sleep was all fucked up. Slept in 30 minute intervals. Too many loud noises.. snoring, doors closing/opening, guards laughing / shouting. Cocksuckers.
Slept in a holding cell with 7 other people.. and one of them was a flamboyant homo. :|
 
I am also going back to work on Monday. I work in construction and get laid off in the every Janruary usually until begining of April. Luckily all this legal bullshit happened during my lay off and the lay off was a bit longer than usual, so my work doesn't know shit about what happened. This is the first time in years that I don't have to worry about the back to work drug test and it's a great feeling to be at ease about it. Bit it's also the first time in years that I will be working completely sober and I feel opretty good about it. And like you said fantom, I'm looking forward to saving tons of money. Its truly sad to think of how much money I make a year and how I should have a lot more to show for it. But I have to look at this as my time for redemption. I've always knocked 12 step in the past but now I have a whole new outlook on it and it is really helping me.
 
You know.. it's one thing to double post..
But to double post within 2 hours from the original post?
How the fuck do you accomplish that feat?

Are you a wizard?
 
LOL Sorry about that. I don't know how that shit happened. I wasn't even on BL at the time that second one was posted. It was a ghost post.
 
OOH!..OOOH! I think I'm on to something...Can I use an excuse "That I was sleep-waliking and wound up on the West-side" to explain why I went AWOL from house arrest?LOL! Or do you think they heard that one before...? Kidnapped? Abducted?...Had an uncontrollable hankering for some soul food? LOL! Probablly not...DAMN! It's hard out here for a pimp!!! "It's haaaard being black and gifted...that's when I gots to throw it all dooown and get's LIIIFTED!!"...
Later folks, be safe. :)
 
goodtymes123 said:
I am also going back to work on Monday. I work in construction and get laid off in the every Janruary usually until begining of April. Luckily all this legal bullshit happened during my lay off and the lay off was a bit longer than usual, so my work doesn't know shit about what happened. This is the first time in years that I don't have to worry about the back to work drug test and it's a great feeling to be at ease about it. Bit it's also the first time in years that I will be working completely sober and I feel opretty good about it. And like you said fantom, I'm looking forward to saving tons of money. Its truly sad to think of how much money I make a year and how I should have a lot more to show for it. But I have to look at this as my time for redemption. I've always knocked 12 step in the past but now I have a whole new outlook on it and it is really helping me.
Click to expand...

I used to work for a roofing supply delivery business and they used to lay me off every winter and during that month and a half I used to do more shit and get into more shit than I did all year!! Didn't have to wake up in the morning...yada, yada. I swear that was such a curse in disguise. Instead of taking a vacation or something, I was getting strung out on all sorts of shit. Fucking hind sight is 20/20. Yeah dude, lucky you. I just assed out of my job, my boss told me he can't wait for me to come back. Eh, it could be worse. When I was locked up, this dude took work van to go shopping, got popped, got the van full of tools impounded...half that shit is most likely gone...
 
MemphisX3 said:
wtf happened to chinky? anyone knnow?
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Nope, I was wondering the same thing but since I'm a a "newfag" I figured it's not my place to ask.
Some peeps think he might be in the clink. (Hope not) Or maybe he got his CDL like he was talking about in his earlier posts and is on the road...idk.
 
itchyscratchy said:
Nope, I was wondering the same thing but since I'm a a "newfag" I figured it's not my place to ask.
Some peeps think he might be in the clink. (Hope not) Or maybe he got his CDL like he was talking about in his earlier posts and is on the road...idk.
Click to expand...

not trying to sound like a dick but with chinky its most likely death or incarceration. thats what happens with most people in this lifestyle who feel they are too smart to take any kind of advice to heart.
 
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