Chapter II: The Abyss is Eternal !

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ghostandthedarknes said:
I'm ampd on coffee and peeing at 33 second intervals ffs
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yea i pretty much gave up caffeine

i still buy coffee though if you can believe it, i have this miniature collection of coffee bags

i think i started stocking up on coffee when i quit meth so i could get going and quite frankly the nightmares are the last symptom and they're not going away
 
Captain.Heroin said:
yea i pretty much gave up caffeine

i still buy coffee though if you can believe it, i have this miniature collection of coffee bags

i think i started stocking up on coffee when i quit meth so i could get going and quite frankly the nightmares are the last symptom and they're not going away
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the road back is def a lot harder than the road in. hang tough brother.
 
ghostandthedarknes said:
the road back is def a lot harder than the road in. hang tough brother.
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i've accepted the nightmares won't go away and will be a nightly thing for life

because i have ptsd

and i have to live with it and not buckle under pressure or depression

and my buddy texted me back even though i probably upset him somehow so he still wants the D and that makes me happy

my nightmares ALWAYS... ALWAYS revolve around....

shooting drugs
evading police
evading crazed people chasing me (who just happen not to be our boys in blue)
being murdered
pursuing people who have fucked shit up
seeing dead family members (this ALWAYS fucks with me)

I woke up the other day thinking my grandma was still alive and then it dawned on me she was dead and it just totally crushed me all over again
 
ghostandthedarknes said:
cocaine for a long time. iv the last 5 years or so but mostly smoked. once in a blue moon nowadays. mostly trampled on garbage here but i haven't looked very hard.
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Yeah those two ROAs are brutal.

It's weird but i feel like you get the same effect weight for weight smoked as shot even though you'd think the powder would be more pure.
 
Captain.Heroin said:
i've accepted the nightmares won't go away and will be a nightly thing for life

because i have ptsd

and i have to live with it and not buckle under pressure or depression

and my buddy texted me back even though i probably upset him somehow so he still wants the D and that makes me happy

my nightmares ALWAYS... ALWAYS revolve around....

shooting drugs
evading police
evading crazed people chasing me (who just happen not to be our boys in blue)
being murdered
pursuing people who have fucked shit up
seeing dead family members (this ALWAYS fucks with me)

I woke up the other day thinking my grandma was still alive and then it dawned on me she was dead and it just totally crushed me all over again
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not a cure all but give this book a try
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Captain.Heroin said:
I actually don't like lucid dreaming

you think if i had volitional control in a dream world I'd just have sex right

nah I get like, totally depressed because I know it isn't real, and I sit/stand idly in the dream until I wake up

Yeah that's like all sorts of dysfunctional, I know
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i hear you. the thing you can use is realizing you're dreaming and wake yourself up before things go bad.
 
madness00 said:
Never got that.

Only a bell ringer. Once.

Yeah i guess it's all garbage except for two or three occassions for me.
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have had the tinnitus effect a few times

i don't like cocaine though and haven't used it in ugh gross long time maybe close to 10 years now

all i get to do are occasionally trip, get baked, drunk maybe just buzzed don't even get drunk

becoming a hardcore sex based PLEBE 😢

and i want to go out but COVID and ISIS are out to get me 😨

not to mention the DEEP STATE
 
Water picks are useful for taking care of your gums after brushing. Flossing works too.


lucid wet dreams are pretty cool imho
 
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