bluegirl
Bluelighter
They say you sometimes have to
"Chameleonise" to survive,
Let the boundary between the
Outer layer of your persona
And their reality blend
Until no one can tell where one
Ends and the other begins
It’s easy, I’m a good actress
I got an ‘A’ for drama
I wear a suit and lipstick
I even own a fucking handbag!
I can feign interest in
Linen parties and matching dinner sets
I have learnt how to
Reinterpret my weekend activities
To fit their narrow ideas of normal
But what I want to know
Is how far this charade
And self-censorship can go
Before I start to forget
Who I really am
I think I already have
-------------------------
i have been working full-time in the public service for the last year and while i don't mind the work THAT much (i do mind doing 3 jobs and getting paid for 1) what has been getting to me lately is the fact that i have to "censor" who i am almost all the time - it is very exhausting constantly being conscious of maintaining a certain image. the part that really scares me is that i think i am "losing" some of myself - and i think these are some of the really valuable aspects that make me interesting and unique. however, i am hoping to leave and do some overseas travel soon so i hope that helps me to escape and become me again.........
bk
"Chameleonise" to survive,
Let the boundary between the
Outer layer of your persona
And their reality blend
Until no one can tell where one
Ends and the other begins
It’s easy, I’m a good actress
I got an ‘A’ for drama
I wear a suit and lipstick
I even own a fucking handbag!
I can feign interest in
Linen parties and matching dinner sets
I have learnt how to
Reinterpret my weekend activities
To fit their narrow ideas of normal
But what I want to know
Is how far this charade
And self-censorship can go
Before I start to forget
Who I really am
I think I already have
-------------------------
i have been working full-time in the public service for the last year and while i don't mind the work THAT much (i do mind doing 3 jobs and getting paid for 1) what has been getting to me lately is the fact that i have to "censor" who i am almost all the time - it is very exhausting constantly being conscious of maintaining a certain image. the part that really scares me is that i think i am "losing" some of myself - and i think these are some of the really valuable aspects that make me interesting and unique. however, i am hoping to leave and do some overseas travel soon so i hope that helps me to escape and become me again.........
bk
