Can't see a way out of this hole I'm in

[spuninohio]

Ive been here for years but never really posted. Anyways here's my situation. I was supposed to get my drivers lisence back last week after having it suspended a year by paying 2000$ to the BMV when my husband decided to drive my car without a lisence (again) and got arrested for driving under suspension and he had to pay all our money to the stupid cops for warrants he had. My nice ass car is impounded forever and I have no way to get it back. My husband would be making decent money if he didn't have to pay lots of debt and buying heroin.

He wastes what little money we do have on his huge heroin addiction and I just do Oxys but I manage them in a way I don't spend more then 100$ a week. His job is hard work and he has back pain so he justifies his use. We,re about to get kicked out of our house and everything would just be fine if I had 4000$ to get my lisence and buy another car so i could get a job but I have no one to help me and my man just don't seem to care about this situation as much as I do. I can't get a job without a fucking lisence or car cuz the public transportation here suxs

He's had the money to get back my lisence twice an blew it on drugs. I feel like I'm in this hole I can't get out of. Unless there's some way for me to get 4 grand in a couple days my life is just completely fucked thanks to my stupid husband. I don't know if I should leave or not. I love him but I don't think he'll ever change and I'm in this situation thanks to him. My lisence was suspended cuz he took my car and wrecked it high one day while I was at work. Im 23 and I don't want to waste anymore of my life dealing with this stupid bullshit. But I have no one to help me and my credit is bad. Any suggestions what I should do because I'm completly depressed and about to just give up.

 

[stardust.hero]

Don't give up spun . Is there any family or friends you can stay with for a short while to get yourself back on track? I mean you might not want to stay with someone out of pride or independence but is there anyone who could help you out?

As for a job is there any businesses around your house that you could possibly ride a bike or walk to? I know it seems like you are stooping to a very low level (i.e: from being a car driver to having to walk, take the bus, or ride a bike). Again possibly a pride swallower.

Why is your car impounded forever? How much do you owe to get it out?

As for your husband I have a friend who has a husband like yours. Constantly getting into trouble, stealing family money for drugs, in and out of jail/rehab. It's just a drain on you. I think if you can find a place to stay, you should probably cut him off for the time being as you try to rebuild yourself.

I would say if you are getting kicked out you will need to exhaust every last resource. Every last friend that might be able to help you out.

Your situation isn't that bad that you need to "give up" whatever that means. I assume suicide or being homeless? Neither of those you are at the point of or even close to the point of yet. You're just going to have to fight extra hard now and get the monkey off your back.

 

[spuninohio]

Actually I found out today that my family will help me with sum money for an apartment. which is a big relief!

Im trying to find a job that's close by it just seems that every job I find is never within a close distance. If I have to ride the bus temporarily That's fine I just really needed my lisence back by now. Now that I have somewhere to go I can save the money for another car an my lisence. I've been talking to my husband and trying to get him to quit and he says he wants to, it's just the whole act of quitting will be tough on him since he'll have to go to work sick.

It would be around 2000$ to get my car out I might as well just take it as a loss because at this point it's cheaper for me just to buy another car.

I feel better today and more hopeful I just want everything to be fixed at once and I just get impatient.

 

[tripnotyzm]

Good luck I'm so glad you got some help from your family
Don't give up on your job hunting either!
Have faith in it sOmetimes job hunting can be difficult and can take more time than we hope for, but if you keep yourself applied to the target you will get lucky eventually!!
Good luck

 

[stardust.hero]

Have you guys ever looked into suboxone or methadone treatment? Do you guys have health insurance? If he can get on a treatment plan that would certainly help him get into work without feeling like he is about to croak.

I know how it feels to just want things done all at once. I am not one for patience either. I am glad you are in a better mindset today. Think positively and accept your families support and use it to get yourself out of this hole.

 

[auto448]

Good to here your family's helping you out financially but I think you husband might a key priority to deal with or you could be back at square one.

Best of luck

 

[spuninohio]

We've looked into suboxone we both have health insurance but all the sub docs refuse to take insurance around here so wed have to be paying 250 for doctors visit every month an another 200 for the subs per month. Its ridiculous how the sub docs have this set up. What addict has 450$ a month for subs?? If they wanted to help people theyd take insurance.

We could easily do the methadone but we,d have to be at the clinic at 5:30 every morning for our doses but we have no car to get there or else we would do that. I'm trying to get him to go to a pain clinic so he can just be prescribed opiates so he can deal with his back pain and slipped discs without being addicted to heroin. I'd like to stop my oxy use as well but I have fibromyalgia and Im in too much pain everyday not to take something. I think things would be better once we both get into pain management.

 

[RedLeader]

What addict has 450$ a month for subs?? If they wanted to help people theyd take insurance.

The same addict who has (probably well over) $450 a month for heroin. Suboxone is essentially a replacement opiate addiction, and Big Pharm can get away with charging money like that because what's effectively $15 per day is cheap in terms of an opiate addiction to a lot of people. Not that I think it's okay to be paying this kind of money for prescription drugs, but that's really another topic for another day.

If you use Suboxone in part of a rapid detox, though, you'd only need a few days' worth of doses each. I would highly suggest at least trying this (if you relapse after you've stepped down, then you can always try Suboxone again, but if you build up a good Suboxone tolerance it can take much longer than you want to taper down off of it).

I sympathise with the no car catch-22. Need car to get to job/money, need money to get car.