can't physically enjoy enjoy parties, clubbing, gigs etc with alcohol alone?

[higherhigherhigher]

i feel like a fucking dick right now. well let me start by saying i can enjoy myself without drugs like just seeing my bf, chilling with mates, goin out for meals and all that but as soon as it gets too any sort of party, gathering, night out clubbing, gig, festival i just CANT physically get into by just getting drunk.

now before it was like if had the option id be on drugs but i still could have a good time getting drunk if i had to for whatever circumstances i.e. the place, the people.

for example i went to a party last night was just a casual thing few drinks for results nights i had shit loads of md at home. i told myself i just wouldnt bring any as the person who had it hates drugs but before i left my i put in my bag like i always fucking do. i told myself i wouldnt do it there i would take it clubbing afterwards even though in the back of my mind i knew i would probably do it there.

i go to my girl mates house get a bit drunk before <snip> , we turn up there and the atmosphere and conversation just feels so put on and fake and awkward. so i go to the toilets take a bomb of md. a pretty big one aswell. im in the toilet for a while people clearly know what im doing and they dont think im cool for it they think im a fucking loser, which i am. i come out feel <snip> the effects for the next 2 hours then just feel ashamed and embarrased and like a complete outcast. i dont go clubbing in the end (even though i was meeting people who do drugs) i just feel so low.


im so sick of it. i would give anything to be able to have a good night out drunk again like a normal person. im only fucking 17 i know people think im weird for it and just trying to be cool and seeking attention. everytime i take drugs at something like that aswell i find the whole having to keep it secret thing just ruins the event more than makes it better. and its embarrasing on my behalf as people can tell.

its like i don't even have that good a time on drugs anymore, but i cant have a good time without them

people say to me "why don't you just get drunk? its so much easier" they really dont fucking understand.

anyone with similar experiences help? not even help just hearing other peoples stories would be good to know im not the only one.

 

[swilow]

Reading your post, it doesn't appear that you had fun even though you did take drugs. Try and look into that. I'd suggest a break from big nights, have a month of just taking it easy at home/wherever, go out for dinner, watch some movies etc. Having a break can be fun and increase the enjoyment when you return back to going out...

 

[Legerity]

Once you're used to consuming a particular substance in a particular setting, it's becomes harder to imagine not having it. Like willow said, if you find it hard in these situations then maybe staying away from them is best for a while. There's nothing wrong with missing a few parties.

And also...getting drunk or getting high is not really anything different. If you need to to get drunk somewhere to have fun, it's the same as needing to get high. Just for some reason it is given it's own separate word and legal status. But people could put any chemical they want into water and call it "drinking a beverage" instead of a drug.

Oh...and you're not a loser

 

[love2party]

Your brains pleasure centers have been stimulated by drugs that are more euphoric than alcohol, that is why alcohol is not cutting it anymore.

 

[suessmayr]

^ this. Drugs like ecstasy (is that what you mean by "md"?) are in my view simply more pleasurable than alcohol. Taking ecstasy and then trying to content yourself with drinking is like discovering alcohol and then trying to content yourself with sobriety. It's like 'raising the bar' - afterwards your whole conception of what constitutes a pleasurable experience to begin with is changed.

You need to lay off the drugs for a while or it'll only get worse. The thing not to do is to look for people who take drugs themselves, so that you can roll without feeling self-conscious. Drug-friendships are the most depraved, absurd and repugnant things in the world anyway.

 

[SideOrderOfOpiates]

From what I have gathered, I see a bit of myself in you. From what I have also gathered, that probably is not a good thing! Haha!

The major difference in our behavior would undeniably be the fact that you appear to be secretive with regard to your drug use. When I use, I am not secretive at all. Hell, by the time I was 16 years old (I am now twenty-three), I had already scared off 98% of my friends due to the fact that I was continuously using meth in front of them (I have now been clean off of meth for approximately two years). My relationship with meth was very, very much like how you stated your current drug use dynamic was. I found myself getting completely loaded, yet seldom did I actually enjoy getting loaded. I frequently felt guilt-ridden as hell, and pathetic for having to resort to such measures that others were obviously aware of. I suppose what I am getting at is that the previously stated issue is a very, very big problem. Now that you are cognizant of the fact that you cannot party like your friends, you should know where each road will take you. Personally, I think that with some people, during certain times in one's life, alcohol can be just as catastrophic. I think it is important for you to do a very realistic self-evaluation and really question whether or not you would have a problem with alcohol if you were to switch back to what is more socially accepted. IMHO, if your need to get loaded on drugs overpowers your integrity in front of others, the same exact thing is quite likely to happen with drugs. When push comes to shove, I have experienced and witnessed absolutely devastating problems due to both substances. If you are at a point in your life where you feel the need to get loaded when you are not even enjoying the high anymore, you should be looking at the underlying conditions—not what supposedly 'works' for your current social circle. Best of luck!

 

[Grondelduck]

I do see his point thought. Nowadays I consider alcohol to be just another drug, and a poor one at that. I like getting a bit tipsy and the likes, but I don't see any reason to go to a drunken state, leading to dizziness and a state of nausea which some even consider a good thing. Hell, the effects that come with a state of drunkenness is what I consider going bad on some other substances Not to say I take drugs to every thing I go, but when clubbing I can't get myself over the hypocritical idea that it's wrong to use another drug beside alcohol despite it's legal status or whatnot. In my book they're all mind-altering substances and just because the one is more socially accepted then the other won't stop me from picking that which will provide me with the most fun. All within acceptable boundaries of course. Though I do realize this is a whole other thing then NEEDING drugs to have a good time. I wonder if there'll ever be a time when people will realize alcohol is just as harmful a substance as many of the illegals out there.

But it still makes me giggle when I discuss drugs (without hinting at my personal usage) with drunk persons and them replying with something like "I don't need drugs to have a fun time" yet barely being able to stand on their feet yelling along with whatever jingle might be playing at the time 8) But to each their own I guess, if only people would be less judgemental about each other and evaluate their own way of life before criticising that of others 8)

I do usually roll with a crowd who share my opinion on this subject though, so that also makes for a world of difference compared to op's case.

 

[suessmayr]

It's all very well and good to speak philosophically about these things: "alcohol differs from heroin not typically but in degree" (and so forth) but the fact is that in the current Western world, alcohol is "in". It is totally acceptable. It is almost expected. We shouldn't understate the importance of this - what people think is ok in a strong sense constitutes what is ok, if we admit that "ok" is a human concept (which I think it clearly is!).

Secondly, I think that almost anyone who has experienced both alcohol and (say) ecstasy, or meth, or heroin, will concede that the latter three are simply and fundamentally more pleasurable. They are more intense, more euphoric, and therefore more habit-forming.

That said, I think that people who give themselves to alcohol in an attempt to avoid drugs simply end up getting dangerously, absurdly shitfaced. It's because they're looking for something which alcohol can never offer, namely, euphoria!

 

[Snarky91]

them replying with something like "I don't need drugs to have a fun time" yet barely being able to stand on their feet yelling along with whatever jingle might be playing at the time 8) But to each their own I guess, if only people would be less judgemental about each other and evaluate their own way of life before criticising that of others 8)

Haha the irony in these situations is comical. Whenever I come across someone who likes his drink and who suggests to me that there is something inherently better about drinking than doing illegal drugs, I point out the lancet study's results that alcohol is linked to 4% of deaths, on the whole. More deaths are linked to alcohol, compared to every illicit drug combined. In some countries such as Russia, something stupid like 1 in 7 will die as a result of alcohol use. In my opinion, the reason people have distorted ideas about alcohol is because it's so institutionalized in western societies. Over a long enough time in history, the most bizarre, damaging, and counter-intuitive customs can become accepted and even ingrained in a society's culture.

http://www.thelancet.com/series/alcohol-and-global-health

 

[suessmayr]

^ yip like religion.

 

[fivelinefury]

Hey higherhigherhigher.

I don't really wanna just crap on about me, but I will a bit anyway haha. Just to let you know that you aren't "weird", or whatever you think people want to think about you.

I wont bore you with my previous drug addictions or anything, but just want to say I know people who are in the same boat, including myself still nowadays, even after overcoming years of drug abuse and addictions. I still need codeine and sometimes small amounts of diazepam to allow myself to enjoy even just a couple of beers with one friend, otherwise I wont want to drink.

For me it certainly isn't a bad thing to not drink or take anything, but just want to let you know you're not alone

 

[miloserp]

Have been there, done that.

I used to mix drugs all the time (coke, e, and alcohol). I came to this one point where I tried this weird drug that I didn't quite know what it was and I was blacked out and ended up bashing through a window and getting two fingertips cut off! That and other bad experiences with drugs concluded me to realize how much happier I am when I don't get high and deal with the after-affect be it loss of money or just depression. Maybe you need another outlet or some life changing experience to set yourself on a good path. I'm not saying cut your fingertips off, and try not to get arrested either. You will find your way if you know who you want to be as a person.