qwe
Bluelight Crew
hai tharr. feel free to skip to the "most fascinating effects" section!
notes: drug history (what i've done to my brain
)
* it all started when i read some philosophy by Tim Leary and Robert Anton Wilson (grade 9-10; wow, they really are pushing drugs on us kids!). i saw that psychedelics had power that could perhaps be used, and wanted to try LSD. the first illicit/nonconventional drug i came across, of course, was marijuana (still haven't found LSD, but mushrooms do)
* i started with a period of experimentation, wanting to see all of the different ways everything can feel. this has subsided, though it's safe to say i've tried every major and many minor drugs and drug categories. i was prescribed clonazepam for social anxiety, and continue to take it daily (have not increased the average dose). i got into opiates for self medicative and recreational purposes, though i am four months clean (chip once a month or so). a few times a year i enjoy mushrooms and MDMA, which give me peak experiences like marijuana and enhance my life well after their high
notes: what i mean by spirituality
* i feel like i understand partly where religion comes from. i grew up religious, going to church, being confirmed, being indoctrinated, etc. i was atheist by grade nine. but i believe some of my peak experiences have a lot in common with "spiritual experiences". the difference is, i don't interpret them in a "supernatural" way. our brains have the ability to make our worlds; they have the ability to make our worlds seem magical as an obvious consequence
notes: set & setting
* i like to smoke at my computer with my headphones. anything that i normally enjoy, i can enhance the enjoyment with marijuana. this ranges from programming to eating
* i use every day. sometimes i find less is more, sometimes i like to indulge, and sometimes i conserve my use due to finances
most fascinating effects
* there is an absurdly intense activation of the visual system of my brain. if i focus on the visualizations, they increase in intensity. they are not at all describable, and are often tied with emotions and experience itself (the visual system is a part of the brain) so they are more than simple beautiful geometrics and imagery; they feel "tied to the soul" in a sense
* these visuals are often fractal-like and dynamic. they morph and seem half-controllable by my will (i can guide their themes, cause an explosion of a certain color, etc). 2D imagery can morph into 3D and the geometry is very similar to the latest winamp version's music visualization tool (which i highly reccomend
)
* besides visual geometrics, i get spatial geometrics. spiral sheets, trajectories, what feels like light (i don't hallucinate any light coming off me; that'd be pretty bad ass) can "emit" from me. like the visual geometrics, these spatial geometrics are often very relatable to religious/spiritual artwork. think of Alex Grey or mandalas or more abstract western spiritual art. a common spatial geometric is a feeling of a sphere around me, or a connection between my body (from bottom to top of head) and the outside (this "line" extends out into nothing) or a connection to the environment around me (or the whole planet... or the solar system...)
* a more abstract "geometric" effect is a feeling of expansion and merging with the universe. with the enhanced visual system and creativity, cool things like feeling connected to a grid covering the planet, feeling totally content, and merged can happen
* i think a lot about important and large concepts, whether they are personal / my life, or social / political, or the universe / reality. and i write some really cool shit
* the drug has positive psychedelic effects, like increased love, empathy, peace, connectedness, open thinking
mediumly fascinating effects
* there is an increased appreciation of art and music. the feeling that music induces (somatic and mental) is increased, and the feeling of music "hitting one's soul" is on overdrive
* my thoughts are stimulated. associated between concepts is easier and faster. writing ability is increased (isn't there a rule about writing trip reports sober? hehe... does not apply here) as is analytical thinking. i feel a strong sense of peace about everything and the kind of "enlightened" thinking the plant seems to induce can influence me positively well beyond having the "feeling" from the drug, for example, by decreasing anxiety (it is an emotion that usually does not make sense in the modern world). one aspect of this, is that it makes me feel more "in the moment"
* the sensation of novelty is also on overdrive. with increased association in my mind, the creation of novelty is also on overdrive. this helps the visuals out. i sometimes call it "creativity vapor"
* pleasure hits my "soul" harder, whether it be food, sex, a good discussion, or my hobby. my hedonism turns on
less fascinating effects
* anxiety and paranoid thinking can increase, especially with the wrong set and setting. having social anxiety, i tend to smoke alone. opiates obliterate any anxiety, including on marijuana, but i've learned it isn't a good idea to do those daily
* while falling asleep on marijuana is quite peaceful, long term daily use almost necessitates marijuana before bed if i want any sleep quality/quantity
* while my motivation is increased and my thoughts stimulated during the peak of the high, when the peak ends the drug can be sedating sometimes. this leads to the odd fact that the drug motivates and invigorates me for the first hour, and relaxes me during the second hour (though generally during the entire time i feel very calm/content; sedating may be a better word, but it is a peaceful sedation rather than fatigue like normal sedatives provide. must be the side effect that scientists call "euphoria"). this is useful for watching scifi or other media; the increased relaxation, the increased analysis, and the increased enjoyment are all quite recreational
effects everyone knows about
* during dry periods, my dreams are whacky
* my eyes get dry
* sometimes i really want to eat
* sometimes i really want to masturbate or have sex
* i don't feel like doing much if i haven't smoked in a long time, and things can get somewhat boring as well. (any parents reading this: if you want to try to get your kid off pot, his grades may suffer if you succeed. oh, the irony)
thoughts
* besides the fact that the drug war does not work, that we are spending money to make people suffer and make drug problems worse, the absurd history of its illegalization, etc etc etc... it is simply sad that this plant is illegal. marijuana prohibition is as anti-human as alcohol's devestating toll on society
notes: drug history (what i've done to my brain
)* it all started when i read some philosophy by Tim Leary and Robert Anton Wilson (grade 9-10; wow, they really are pushing drugs on us kids!). i saw that psychedelics had power that could perhaps be used, and wanted to try LSD. the first illicit/nonconventional drug i came across, of course, was marijuana (still haven't found LSD, but mushrooms do)
* i started with a period of experimentation, wanting to see all of the different ways everything can feel. this has subsided, though it's safe to say i've tried every major and many minor drugs and drug categories. i was prescribed clonazepam for social anxiety, and continue to take it daily (have not increased the average dose). i got into opiates for self medicative and recreational purposes, though i am four months clean (chip once a month or so). a few times a year i enjoy mushrooms and MDMA, which give me peak experiences like marijuana and enhance my life well after their high
notes: what i mean by spirituality
* i feel like i understand partly where religion comes from. i grew up religious, going to church, being confirmed, being indoctrinated, etc. i was atheist by grade nine. but i believe some of my peak experiences have a lot in common with "spiritual experiences". the difference is, i don't interpret them in a "supernatural" way. our brains have the ability to make our worlds; they have the ability to make our worlds seem magical as an obvious consequence
notes: set & setting
* i like to smoke at my computer with my headphones. anything that i normally enjoy, i can enhance the enjoyment with marijuana. this ranges from programming to eating
* i use every day. sometimes i find less is more, sometimes i like to indulge, and sometimes i conserve my use due to finances
most fascinating effects
* there is an absurdly intense activation of the visual system of my brain. if i focus on the visualizations, they increase in intensity. they are not at all describable, and are often tied with emotions and experience itself (the visual system is a part of the brain) so they are more than simple beautiful geometrics and imagery; they feel "tied to the soul" in a sense
* these visuals are often fractal-like and dynamic. they morph and seem half-controllable by my will (i can guide their themes, cause an explosion of a certain color, etc). 2D imagery can morph into 3D and the geometry is very similar to the latest winamp version's music visualization tool (which i highly reccomend
)* besides visual geometrics, i get spatial geometrics. spiral sheets, trajectories, what feels like light (i don't hallucinate any light coming off me; that'd be pretty bad ass) can "emit" from me. like the visual geometrics, these spatial geometrics are often very relatable to religious/spiritual artwork. think of Alex Grey or mandalas or more abstract western spiritual art. a common spatial geometric is a feeling of a sphere around me, or a connection between my body (from bottom to top of head) and the outside (this "line" extends out into nothing) or a connection to the environment around me (or the whole planet... or the solar system...)
* a more abstract "geometric" effect is a feeling of expansion and merging with the universe. with the enhanced visual system and creativity, cool things like feeling connected to a grid covering the planet, feeling totally content, and merged can happen
* i think a lot about important and large concepts, whether they are personal / my life, or social / political, or the universe / reality. and i write some really cool shit
* the drug has positive psychedelic effects, like increased love, empathy, peace, connectedness, open thinking
mediumly fascinating effects
* there is an increased appreciation of art and music. the feeling that music induces (somatic and mental) is increased, and the feeling of music "hitting one's soul" is on overdrive
* my thoughts are stimulated. associated between concepts is easier and faster. writing ability is increased (isn't there a rule about writing trip reports sober? hehe... does not apply here) as is analytical thinking. i feel a strong sense of peace about everything and the kind of "enlightened" thinking the plant seems to induce can influence me positively well beyond having the "feeling" from the drug, for example, by decreasing anxiety (it is an emotion that usually does not make sense in the modern world). one aspect of this, is that it makes me feel more "in the moment"
* the sensation of novelty is also on overdrive. with increased association in my mind, the creation of novelty is also on overdrive. this helps the visuals out. i sometimes call it "creativity vapor"
* pleasure hits my "soul" harder, whether it be food, sex, a good discussion, or my hobby. my hedonism turns on
less fascinating effects
* anxiety and paranoid thinking can increase, especially with the wrong set and setting. having social anxiety, i tend to smoke alone. opiates obliterate any anxiety, including on marijuana, but i've learned it isn't a good idea to do those daily
* while falling asleep on marijuana is quite peaceful, long term daily use almost necessitates marijuana before bed if i want any sleep quality/quantity
* while my motivation is increased and my thoughts stimulated during the peak of the high, when the peak ends the drug can be sedating sometimes. this leads to the odd fact that the drug motivates and invigorates me for the first hour, and relaxes me during the second hour (though generally during the entire time i feel very calm/content; sedating may be a better word, but it is a peaceful sedation rather than fatigue like normal sedatives provide. must be the side effect that scientists call "euphoria"). this is useful for watching scifi or other media; the increased relaxation, the increased analysis, and the increased enjoyment are all quite recreational
effects everyone knows about
* during dry periods, my dreams are whacky
* my eyes get dry
* sometimes i really want to eat
* sometimes i really want to masturbate or have sex
* i don't feel like doing much if i haven't smoked in a long time, and things can get somewhat boring as well. (any parents reading this: if you want to try to get your kid off pot, his grades may suffer if you succeed. oh, the irony)
thoughts
* besides the fact that the drug war does not work, that we are spending money to make people suffer and make drug problems worse, the absurd history of its illegalization, etc etc etc... it is simply sad that this plant is illegal. marijuana prohibition is as anti-human as alcohol's devestating toll on society
