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Can you be born gay or is it a choice?

PotatoMan

PotatoMan

Bluelight Crew
Joined
Mar 5, 2013
Messages
10,969
Choice IMO. Childhood influences and overall life experience gives you your perception and allows you to understand what you enjoy in this world.

Being born gay makes no sense. Was I born to like cheese? Can you show me the physical indicator in our bodies that make us gay? If you can then show me the one that makes me like cheese.

All my friends tell me I'm wrong.

Share your views guys. I'm all ears. :)
 
I have talked about this with a lot of different people and I feel like the majority of people's opinions seems to be 50/50. It is my opinion that we are born with our sexual preference already implanted in us. Children are becoming aware of their sexual preferences at much earlier ages now, and I think this is because it is much more widely accepted to be gay in society, now more then ever. Whereas before, many young people would be too afraid to accept themselves for who they truly were because they knew it would be looked down upon.

There are plenty of things in this world that can not be proven with physical evidence. I agree that our preferences can be influenced by experience and upbringing, but when it comes to sexual attraction, well that comes naturally. I am heterosexual meaning in my case I am attracted to females physically. I could not get it up for a guy if I tried, so there is no choice in the matter.
 
Cosmic Giraffe said:
I have talked about this with a lot of different people and I feel like the majority of people's opinions seems to be 50/50. It is my opinion that we are born with our sexual preference already implanted in us. Children are becoming aware of their sexual preferences at much earlier ages now, and I think this is because it is much more widely accepted to be gay in society, now more then ever. Whereas before, many young people would be too afraid to accept themselves for who they truly were because they knew it would be looked down upon.

There are plenty of things in this world that can not be proven with physical evidence. I agree that our preferences can be influenced by experience and upbringing, but when it comes to sexual attraction, well that comes naturally. I am heterosexual meaning in my case I am attracted to females physically. I could not get it up for a guy if I tried, so there is no choice in the matter.
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This.
 
Sexual attraction you are identifying with sexual arousal right? But can you look at a man like Ryan Gosling and say that he is attractive? Personally I can, but unless they are universally attractive I wouldn't be able to tell. Like you CG, I can't tell if you're good looking or not. But I can tell Ryan Gosling is. But I wouldn't say I'm sexually attracted to him.

Your idea of being born with a sexual preference doesn't float by me. It's a longshot imo. If this was the case then I would think that a doctor can tell if baby is gonna be gay or straight from since they're in the womb. But I believe it is not until said child is exposed to the world would they know their sexual preference.


You're saying you're born with it. If I took a newborn into my house (who was born gay) and only exposed it to "straight" things and showed it movies about straight love & etc, no matter what he WILL be gay?
 
IMO absolutely. Do you have any idea how many fathers force their sons to do "man" stuff because they fear their kid may turn out gay if they don't? Denial is a really common reaction for parents to have, and it only makes the child resent them for it later in life. Yes I can tell and have no problem freely admitting when another man is attractive, that does not mean I could ever have a sexually intimate relationship with him.
 
No I wouldn't force it at all. It wouldn't be a case of that. I've had a friend hang himself over that shit.

It's just my cousin, me and my aunt and uncle got in a huge debate about it. My aunt&uncle said you're born with it as it happens in nature and why would it be a choice with all the ridicule homosexuality receives and my cousin and I were saying it's a choice.

Funnily enough my cousin is actually gay, he's had gay sex and shit with some of my friends. He came out to one of my close friends. He still fucks girls tho (so he says) but he said it's a choice. He also doesn't know that I know about his past gay stuff so he's extra passive aggressive n shit. I assume that's just denial tho.
 
I feel like everyone is gay to a certain extent, it just depends on what level and how comfortable you are with your own sexuality, as well as what the true definition of gay would be to the individual. Like I said I am straight, but can admit when another man is attractive. I have kissed some of my best friends who are dudes right on the lips, as well as girls that I was just friends with. Now I don't mean full out make out session, just a small peck on the lips. Either way it wasn't weird then and it isn't weird now, due to the context of that particular sign of affection in that moment.

Am I making sense at all?
 
Potato - I think your cousin might be bi. For bisexuals, it's a choice. For me it's not. There were times when I had such horrible experiences with girlfriends that I would have converted to homosexuality if it were possible.
 
socko said:
Potato - I think your cousin might be bi. For bisexuals, it's a choice. For me it's not. There were times when I had such horrible experiences with girlfriends that I would have converted to homosexuality if it were possible.
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Being bisexual is NOT a choice, or someone's personal decision.

When I first discovered I am bisexual I wasn't too happy about it and at the time when I was younger, I had the mentality that if I didn't really act on it and only had sex with women and got off to women in porn that I could change my sexuality and stop being bisexual, and it doesn't work that way.

It is possible for a man to be gay, or a woman to be lesbian but they have sex with the opposite sex/gender. They're just simply not sexually attracted to their opposite gender though. Some of my gay male friends have had sex with women or even at one time had girlfriends or wives; but all sex with women did was just show them how they're not sexually attracted to women or the female gender at all, and that they're only attracted to men. Lesbian women I know who have been married to men or had boyfriends and sex with men said the same thing how it just showed them that they're only sexually attracted to women.
 
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PriestTheyCalledHim said:
Being bisexual is NOT a choice, or someone's personal decision.

When I first discovered I am bisexual I wasn't too happy about it and at the time when I was younger, I had the mentality that if I didn't really act on it and only had sex with women and got off to women in porn that I could change my sexuality and stop being bisexual, and it doesn't work that way...
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Either I don't understand what you're saying, or I have the wrong idea of what bisexuality really is. I understand that you can't turn off the attraction to those of either gender, but can't you choose which to act on? For example, if you had a bad experience with women, could you just say that you need a break from women and will only be with men for a while?
 
socko said:
Either I don't understand what you're saying, or I have the wrong idea of what bisexuality really is. I understand that you can't turn off the attraction to those of either gender, but can't you choose which to act on? For example, if you had a bad experience with women, could you just say that you need a break from women and will only be with men for a while?
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I can choose to act on having sex with either women and men; but I can't actually stop being sexually attracted to either sex/gender, and I can also fall in love with both genders/sexes; but plenty of bisexual people fall in love with only one gender/sex, and some like me fall in love with both.

Of course, I do have my own personal preferences sexually, and for who I want to date or get into a relationship with as we all do. I'm also not sexually attracted to all people of either sex/gender that I encounter just like people who are gay/lesbian, or heterosexual aren't sexually attracted to all the people of the gender/sex they're attracted to that they see or meet.

When I was younger I remember trying to be gay, and that didn't work since I was still sexually attracted to women.

I don't really think of someone's gender/sex when it comes to relationships/dating even though I've had not so pleasant experiences while in a relationship or dating both sexes/genders, and am taking a break from any sort of relationship/partnership now since my last partnership/relationship which didn't go that well, and that did not end on good terms at all like one of my previous ones has.
 
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I know what im about to say makes no sense it's just what I've observed, and I know it makes no sense.

All the lesbians I've known growing up seemed as if no guy would ever be into them so at some point they decided to go the other way.

My best friends brother is gay and didnt come out until 9th/10th grade and I really couldn't tell but it's like the day he came out all of a sudden his voice changed to much higher. Like huh?

Would love to heAr from a gay guy here on bluelight
 
Your born like it. That's why pedophiles are about they don't choose to be paedophiles otherwise there wouldn't be any around they are born like it.
 
People are born into thier sexual orientation, I have little or no reservation with MO in this.

Could experiences change this orientation.. yes the brain is placid. Majority of time no people are genetically predisposed.
 
PotatoMan said:
Choice IMO. Childhood influences and overall life experience gives you your perception and allows you to understand what you enjoy in this world.

Being born gay makes no sense. Was I born to like cheese? Can you show me the physical indicator in our bodies that make us gay? If you can then show me the one that makes me like cheese.

All my friends tell me I'm wrong.

Share your views guys. I'm all ears. :)
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wow

sex and cheese are the same.

maybe you can choose if you are bi and you can suppress your personally undesirable traits.

as for gays choosing. NO.

why logically anyone would choose an "option" causing so much stress is beyond me. there are 20 times more available women than gay men so also thats a limiting factor.

sorry but you're simply wrong
 
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