Mental Health Brain Magnets, TMS

[Fairy of the Flowers]

So yeah it's actually called Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation sounds like its just like magnets for the brain lol, it's a treatment for anxiety and depression, but I don't know much about it, I don't know if I even need it, or maybe want it, it is possible to get on the NHS if other treatments have failed, but it's probably still hard to get as its so expensive

Medication don't work for me, and I quit therapy as I didn't get on with it, I'm to anxious to talk about my anxiety and to paranoid to talk about stuff I'm paranoid about fucksake it sounds hilarious but it's true

So um, I don't even know what's actually depression or what is trying to come off the codeine that I've been on that overlapped me coming off mirtazapine, which overlapped the benzos, oh and the ketamine thrown in, but I stopped it about 3 or more months ago, it's been self medication and mirtazapine for a while but stopped it all, bar small amounts of codeine I've been on for my fibromyalgia which I've been on for 3 months maybe, but I'm coming off that now too

But when ever I feel low I am terrified of my bad overthinking and depression coming back where I thought about suicide but wouldn't but I was in a dark place, and I'm scared of it coming back

Anyone had TMS and did it work, how long does it work for and what side effects are there, will it stop overthinking and depression, I just want my head to shut up when it gets in that state, all these medications about why can't some scientist invent a "shut up brain pill" lol

 

[ageingpartyfiend]

It's really great to read that you're looking at coming off your meds, as they were clearly quite unhelpful for you

We all wish there was a magic pill Unfortunately there isn't , as you're discovering

You're still looking outside of yourself for the 'answer' or the 'cure ' or whatever though - I'm not criticising you in any way for that, it's what we have been programmed to believe since childhood and it's a harsh lesson when we realise it's untrue

Almost every single person I am personally aware of who has recovered from MH issues has stated (in so many words) that their recovery only became possible when they began to own their recovery process and began to look inward, rather than outward, for the means of recovery

You want to calm your mind? Treat your own anxiety etc? Well, you can. You can. It takes work, hard work which I am very well aware that depression etc makes much harder. Please, look seriously into meditation practices. Incredibly beneficial for almost everyone who commits to a serious practice of it.

 

[Fairy of the Flowers]

@ageingpartyfiend Thankyou for the reply, wise words, people keep saying meditate but I can't stop thinking of stuff when I've tried, I find I need the telly on to try and drown out my thoughts, if I sit to try and meditate that's when I start thinking, of everything, anything, random stuff, worries, you know, my whole body and brain wants to run away from itself, one minute seems like an hour, and I'm itching to stop trying to relax by meditation

I wish I could do it, I might try guided meditation again though as then I can concentrate on the persons voice, do most people enjoy it, as I find it boring, I want it to be over before the bloke has even said "now I want you to close your eyes and listen to the sound of my voice" lol, yes I'm just lazy, I want a quick fix but you're so right the answer ain't in pills, I have got guided meditation in a playlist on YouTube actually you reminded me

 

[Bella Figura]

I think it's a common misconception that meditation = having no thoughts. The point of mindfulness is to notice the thoughts that come and go through your mind, and as you do, remind yourself to focus on your breath and not attach yourself to these thoughts. The more you do it, the less the thoughts bother you, you just notice them, and notice them leave as you re-focus on your breathing. That's where the healing happens, every time you have a thought come and go, which it will, if you go back to focusing on simply breathing in and breathing out

Guided meditation can be a good start. The more you do it the more calm you're gonna feel, you might even start looking forward to it!

 

[Fairy of the Flowers]

Thanks @Bella Figura I'll start tomorrow as my anxiety and low moods seem worse when I wake up, so it makes sence to start tomorrow soon as I wake up, well after a cuppa tea obviously lol

I've also been put off breathing exercises as they make me aware of my breathing which makes me over breathe, then I can't breathe, nothings ever simple is it, over thinking over breathing lol, hopefully I'll get there

I like the thought of mindfulness I thought it was different to meditation in a way, just thinking of what you are doing, not what you could be doing, not worries etc, like Raj in The Big Bang Theory says "when you're washing the dishes just think of washing the dishes, the soapy water and the bubbles" you know, although the other day when I washed up a builder working up on scaffolding on the block of flats opposite took his top off so my mind was took off things then lol

But meditating is just sitting, but what do you sit and think of, do you sit and think of the word "nothing" to try and distract yourself, I understand guided meditation as you focus on someone's voice but what about normal meditation, you sit and let your own brain let loose on your mind, bloody hell I'm not sure I want to open that can of worms lol

 

[Bella Figura]

I'll walk you through what I do:

1 - Sit down / lie down, whatever is more comfortable.
2 - Tell yourself the chair/bed is supporting you rather than you are sitting on the chair/bed.
3 - Do a body scan starting from the top of your head down to your face, your neck, shoulders, arms, torso, legs, feet and just notice any tension and try and relax your muscles one by one.
4 - Focus on your breathing, it doesn't need to be laboured or forced, just breathe in and out through nose and notice the breath.
5 - If it helps, you can say the word Rising as you breathe in, and Falling as you breathe out in your mind to keep you focused.
6 - You WILL have thoughts, this is normal, everyone does, just notice them without judgement (very important) and return to focusing on your breath. Don't let your thoughts define you, they're just thoughts. Think of it as background noise/chatter, with no real importance to be placed on them. All that matters is the breath.
7 - Repeat for 10mins and then you're done If you want you can go always go longer, but just 10mins a day is enough that you'll start noticing an improvement.

For me personally, it helps me not be so reactive to upsetting things in my day to day, it stops me automatically having an emotional outburst and I can just remain calm in stressful situations when I keep up with a daily practice.

Hope this helps

And avoid buff shirtless builders if you can

 

[Fairy of the Flowers]

I littrally laughed my ass off at that last bit lol

Thankyou so much for your help @Bella Figura I'm going to try this, I needed to know what to focas on and rising and falling of breath is a good one, and I like that I can just do ten minutes

If I can stop worrying about stuff that's a start, and things that upset me during the day, bloody Facebook posts anything about cruelty to animals I can't cope, yes alot of people get upset, but me I think I don't know if I want to live in this cruel world anymore, can't bear to see animals suffering, its one of the things that effect my mental health bad, my son says my hearts to big lol

 

[Bella Figura]

Laughter is the best medicine

Animal cruelty is horrible, I hate it too, maybe unsubscribe from any Facebook groups that upset you? I went off Facebook completely because it just wasn't adding anything to my life, just stressing me out.

 

[Fairy of the Flowers]

I went off Facebook completely because it just wasn't adding anything to my life, just stressing me out

Me too, I deleted my whole Facebook account for 2 and a half years, then lockdown happened and I got bored and got talked into going back on it so made a new profile, I only follow happy pages and remove anyone posting stuff that upsets me, but by then I've seen the post, I'd delete it again but it helps with boredom and I did make some new friends since I joined last summer, which did get me out and about instead of stuck in my flat, so for now I'll keep it but I might delete it again one day