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  • EADD Moderators: Pissed_and_messed | Shinji Ikari

Bonfires

F.U.B.A.R. said:
It's a posh cunts pronunciation of 'Bumfire' - that thing wot happens when you try and light a fart without trimming yer ring beard first...
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Ouchy. Nothing more embarrassing than when that happens when performing my party piece at Chrimbo

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1394 said:
Well I know someone who works as a children's psychologist in Northern Ireland, said person had a patient who was very young (can't remember the age but likely between 9-10). Anyway, the patient was a pyromaniac, kept lighting things on fire.

Right, so every 12th of July, Protestants living in Northern Ireland light bonfires (and tend to shout "FUCK THE POPE" or have pictures of the Pope on the bonfires) but it's specifically on the 12th, not the 11th or the 13th... the 12th.

Well this pyromaniac little boy decides "ohhh look at this big structure of wood, I'd like to see that go up in flames" and lights one of the bonfires before the 12th of July.

The locals never caught him apparently. I thought it was very funny.
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Did they look for the guy with 'KKK' emblazoned on his chest? ;)

I can't say I attended any mass burnings this year, I have failed this annum in my trials as both a Satanic Bible studying Goth and as a scorned lover.

<3
 
Wicker_Man_27_film_3337747b.jpg


I might start dressing like Lord Summerisle on Guy Fawkes from now on - he has panache.

Then do a lighting my own fart joke at the finale as your hear the screams form the Wickerman "Oh LORD, OH JESUS CHRIST..." as everyone gathers round creepily singing. It would be better than that Glasgow Green effort they have annually.
 
Mushet, This I have to see! I may get a bit creepy like and find you. I'm only 10 min on the train from the city centre. Mwahhh hahahaha ;)
 
Decided to do a bonfire for kids and parents last year.

Made the mistake of going clubbing and getting trollied on pills night before.

Pissing with rain bonfire won't get going first mistake grab the diesel, wife forgot to tell me she had actually filled my diesel can with petrol. Approach bonfire begin to pour WOOOOF. Luckily I dropped just in time and threw myself sideways. Luckily as it was pissing down no one was close and stood in a shed quite a few yards away.

Gave the job of fireworks to my mate as I was slightly shook up and not trusting myself. Alas he'd been out with me. Cue to the horizontal firework display as the rockets fell over in the soggy soil.

No one hurt thank god.

Needless to say lessons learnt, leave it to the professionals. Never again.
 
Itsgoneundertheboa said:
Decided to do a bonfire for kids and parents last year.

Made the mistake of going clubbing and getting trollied on pills night before.

Pissing with rain bonfire won't get going first mistake grab the diesel, wife forgot to tell me she had actually filled my diesel can with petrol. Approach bonfire begin to pour WOOOOF. Luckily I dropped just in time and threw myself sideways. Luckily as it was pissing down no one was close and stood in a shed quite a few yards away.

Gave the job of fireworks to my mate as I was slightly shook up and not trusting myself. Alas he'd been out with me. Cue to the horizontal firework display as the rockets fell over in the soggy soil.

No one hurt thank god.

Needless to say lessons learnt, leave it to the professionals. Never again.
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Don't play with fireworks on a come down. Jesus. I find it difficult even to think clearly on one, tasks like using the remote control for the TV is a challenge!
 
MUSHET said:
Wicker_Man_27_film_3337747b.jpg


I might start dressing like Lord Summerisle on Guy Fawkes from now on - he has panache.

Then do a lighting my own fart joke at the finale as your hear the screams form the Wickerman "Oh LORD, OH JESUS CHRIST..." as everyone gathers round creepily singing. It would be better than that Glasgow Green effort they have annually.
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Oh yes! I'll be there like a shot (especially if you can recreate the scene where a scantily clad Britt Eckland is wandering around slapping her thighs =D )
 
I love that scene, she's beautiful, a temptress and her voice when singing 'Wilow's song is utterly captivating.

Stupid bastard should have been right in there for a ride, instead he had an appointment with the Wicker Man. What a complete fud. He must have had a raging hard on but let his ridiculous Christian morals get in the way. Idiot probably thought he'd go to some kind of heaven. Na, you got burnt mate, could have had the best night of your life. I'm glad he got wickered in the end.

It's actually up there with on of my most terrifying scenes in film history. Truly horrific.
 
Lol @boa's comedown bonfire in the rain. I can feel how much of a chore that was from here.
 
F.U.B.A.R. said:
Ya know, I used to be sympathetic towards Guy Fawkes and his intentions, then I discovered he was a fuckin Catholic... ;)
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Wasn't guido fawkes the victim of an elaborate false flag/entrapment designed to whip up hatred for catholics? I remember reading (probably somwhere flaky) that one of the gunpowder plot conspirators was a King's spy, and that the gunpowder he provided was actually inert and wouldn't have exploded - bit like the modern FBI method of anti terror policing.
 
Vurtual said:
Wasn't guido fawkes the victim of an elaborate false flag/entrapment designed to whip up hatred for catholics? I remember reading (probably somwhere flaky) that one of the gunpowder plot conspirators was a King's spy, and that the gunpowder he provided was actually inert and wouldn't have exploded - bit like the modern FBI method of anti terror policing.
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Doubt it. You don't need to whip up hatred for catholics - it comes naturally =D
 
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