kazza_baby
Bluelighter
Not quite single.. but not completely attatched.
Having fun with this one.
Having fun with this one.
-
-
AADD Moderators: Tronica
Bluelight Singles thread "Living without justification" Part 2
- Thread starter BREAKaBEAT
- Start date
Shnouzerpuff
Bluelighter
Despite being placed ninth in the "top ten" posters for this thread I am still with the girl I posted about from a few months back - things going quite well.
I have become one of those people who I once hated...
...a smug non-single, posting in here about how dreamy life currently is.
whaaaaat haaave I become!?!?!
I have become one of those people who I once hated...
...a smug non-single, posting in here about how dreamy life currently is.
whaaaaat haaave I become!?!?!
katmeow
Bluelight Crew
Awww shnouz... that's great 
Now take that smugness back outta here ... I just want to know about the misery of coupledom so I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything
Don't worry, it wasn't a post asking for reassurance... I'm actually quite comfortable with being single. It probably suits me better than being in a relationship to be honest, hence my statement about not being a relationship person.
I'm just being realistic about the fact that I doubt anything will eventuate with the only person I sort of like for various reasons and that there is no-one else on the radar at the moment. I have a tendency to royally headfuck myself over people I like, and I can do without that at the moment, so I'm quite happy not to seek anyone out. As I said on my last post, I prefer to get to know someone as a friend first anyway... it's generally not until months down the track that I actually realise I'm interested.
Anyway, I'm also reposting a question I asked that seemed to get lost over new years...
Now take that smugness back outta here ... I just want to know about the misery of coupledom so I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything
FaTz said:^^^I don't think that's true kat... Obviously it's just a guy that you would completly mesh with hasn't been found yet...But I'm SURE he's out there...
Personally I'm in for the single long haul... And I've come to understand that now :-/
Don't worry, it wasn't a post asking for reassurance... I'm actually quite comfortable with being single. It probably suits me better than being in a relationship to be honest, hence my statement about not being a relationship person.
I'm just being realistic about the fact that I doubt anything will eventuate with the only person I sort of like for various reasons and that there is no-one else on the radar at the moment. I have a tendency to royally headfuck myself over people I like, and I can do without that at the moment, so I'm quite happy not to seek anyone out. As I said on my last post, I prefer to get to know someone as a friend first anyway... it's generally not until months down the track that I actually realise I'm interested.
Anyway, I'm also reposting a question I asked that seemed to get lost over new years...
bikki_muncher69
Bluelighter
^guilty? im not so sure if thats the word for it but yes that movie definatly dose have an impact on you if your single. I guess it depends how single you are, like if you have been single for a while, or if you have difficulty finding people you can have decent relationships with. I guess garden state dosent really make me feel guilty more sad, happy. Sad it cant be that easy for all of us, finding someone true and falling in love with tears and all ect... happy for the people in the movie!!
sorry if i dident answer your question well kat, but yar id say if definatly gives you that gut feeling, whether it be guilt or something else its still there and makes us think about where we stand single.
sorry if i dident answer your question well kat, but yar id say if definatly gives you that gut feeling, whether it be guilt or something else its still there and makes us think about where we stand single.
Shnouzerpuff
Bluelighter
^^ I think it gives everyone a difficult expectation of love and "the perfect partner" to live up to within the confines of Real-Life(TM).
Not exactly making people feel guilty as such, but instead maybe influencing people to pass up otherwise good and solid relationships all because the real-world reality of meeting a partner cannot match up to the scripted Hollywood romantic comedy. Love in five days and a blissfully happy ending? A big fuck you to the Meg Ryan's and Reese Witherspoon's of the world.
Yeah it is horrid. I cannot follow up the smile I get across the bar from the cute blonde anymore. Lunches tend to cost double. I have to go to stupid things I don't want to like BBQ's that her friends are holding - on nights I would rather just read my book and go to sleep.
I can't do tequila shots with ex girlfriends if the chance happens... at least not without a pretty good explanation and lengthy notification.
Valentine's Day costs a heap and you have to sit in a room at a restaurant full of people who are all going to have sex that night. Some of them are old. Some are obese.
Some are drunk.
Some steal your McNuggets.
Not exactly making people feel guilty as such, but instead maybe influencing people to pass up otherwise good and solid relationships all because the real-world reality of meeting a partner cannot match up to the scripted Hollywood romantic comedy. Love in five days and a blissfully happy ending? A big fuck you to the Meg Ryan's and Reese Witherspoon's of the world.
OK...
Yeah it is horrid. I cannot follow up the smile I get across the bar from the cute blonde anymore. Lunches tend to cost double. I have to go to stupid things I don't want to like BBQ's that her friends are holding - on nights I would rather just read my book and go to sleep.
I can't do tequila shots with ex girlfriends if the chance happens... at least not without a pretty good explanation and lengthy notification.
Valentine's Day costs a heap and you have to sit in a room at a restaurant full of people who are all going to have sex that night. Some of them are old. Some are obese.
Some are drunk.
Some steal your McNuggets.
katmeow
Bluelight Crew
Thankyou m'dear
Yeah, maybe guilty was not the right choice of word, but I have a sneaking suspicion I may have been drinking at the time.
More I guess that feeling that there is something wrong with being single, that you should be out there looking for someone to be with because that will make your life ever so much better. Sometimes I watch movies like that (Garden State just happened to be the catalyst for that day), and it makes me feel so horribly alone.
Shnouz, you've also hit the nail on the head about the whole unreal expectation of the Hollywood style romance, but at the same time, they make it look so easy as well. .. if that makes sense.
Yeah, maybe guilty was not the right choice of word, but I have a sneaking suspicion I may have been drinking at the time.
More I guess that feeling that there is something wrong with being single, that you should be out there looking for someone to be with because that will make your life ever so much better. Sometimes I watch movies like that (Garden State just happened to be the catalyst for that day), and it makes me feel so horribly alone.
Shnouz, you've also hit the nail on the head about the whole unreal expectation of the Hollywood style romance, but at the same time, they make it look so easy as well. .. if that makes sense.
Shnouzerpuff
Bluelighter
That is the devillish part of it.
Of course most think it is a truckload of sentimental bullshit... but there is still that miniscule outside chance it is all true and you just simply have not been lucky enough to find the person who makes you feel like that yet.
Which personally I think is a whole world of lie. But I kind of have to - or else I wouldn't have had a relationship longer than 2 months in my life.
Of course most think it is a truckload of sentimental bullshit... but there is still that miniscule outside chance it is all true and you just simply have not been lucky enough to find the person who makes you feel like that yet.
Which personally I think is a whole world of lie. But I kind of have to - or else I wouldn't have had a relationship longer than 2 months in my life.
up all night
Bluelight Crew
heh kat.
I once said something similar to someone but I have a very specific movie to blame for my unrealistic expectations of love and other catastrophes... Reality Bites.
I've always wanted my Troy... but if there'd been a Reality Bites 2 I would have realised Troy was actually a fuckass and Lelaina should never have gone out with him.
The End.
Anyway, the single thing fucking sucks tonight. It'll be cool tomorrow. Probably.
I once said something similar to someone but I have a very specific movie to blame for my unrealistic expectations of love and other catastrophes... Reality Bites.
I've always wanted my Troy... but if there'd been a Reality Bites 2 I would have realised Troy was actually a fuckass and Lelaina should never have gone out with him.
The End.
Anyway, the single thing fucking sucks tonight. It'll be cool tomorrow. Probably.
Mary Poppins
Bluelighter
^ give the girl a medal. trophy. tiara. something.
fuck that movie and the unrealistic ideals it presented that permeated into my brain
fuck that movie and the unrealistic ideals it presented that permeated into my brain
katmeow
Bluelight Crew
up all night 
I so wanted an AJ from Empire Records, but now I realise that guys who are clumsy about expressing their affection just make me feel uncomfortable
I so wanted an AJ from Empire Records, but now I realise that guys who are clumsy about expressing their affection just make me feel uncomfortable
ozbreaker
Bluelighter
I tend to think it's just pandering to the fantasy of meeting that special person for a lazy society that wants it all.
On the same note I once saw a movie (Kicking and Screaming?) that had a rant in there about lady and the tramp type movies (and I guess Reality Bites) being sinister movies designed to lower the expectations of girls romantic future beaus.
On the same note I once saw a movie (Kicking and Screaming?) that had a rant in there about lady and the tramp type movies (and I guess Reality Bites) being sinister movies designed to lower the expectations of girls romantic future beaus.
Rubber_Duck
Bluelighter
*sigh* Kat ….i cant help but agree with everything you say……
I think its come to the stage that I have been single for 6 months now, that I have reached this threshold of giving up. I guess it depends what state of mind im in
I seriously believe my soul mate is out there, however I don’t want to meet her now…….or I feel like I cant wait for it. Cant wait to be swept off my feet.
Because of this 6 month gap my brain has talked me into believing that im wasting time seeing girls until then. I know im traveling this year and it would be a burden to have a gf, on the other hand its frustrating not having a partner at organized events.
Yip being single tonight sux!
You learn to love, not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly
I think its come to the stage that I have been single for 6 months now, that I have reached this threshold of giving up. I guess it depends what state of mind im in
I seriously believe my soul mate is out there, however I don’t want to meet her now…….or I feel like I cant wait for it. Cant wait to be swept off my feet.
Because of this 6 month gap my brain has talked me into believing that im wasting time seeing girls until then. I know im traveling this year and it would be a burden to have a gf, on the other hand its frustrating not having a partner at organized events.
Yip being single tonight sux!
You learn to love, not by finding a perfect person, but by learning to see an imperfect person perfectly
astrosmurf
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Aug 8, 2001
- Messages
- 3,633
katmeow said:I so wanted an AJ from Empire Records, but now I realise that guys who are clumsy about expressing their affection just make me feel uncomfortable
AJ was fucking hot, but i always wanted marc. i also fawn over big from sex and the city; is this my subconcious way of crying out for disfunctional relationships?
![:\](https://bluelight.org/xf/BL_Images/Orig_Emoji/wrygrin.gif "wry grin :\")
up all night
Bluelight Crew
Rubber_duck: I don't think you have to see someone as perfect to love them. I've never thought of anyone as perfect. I think it's all about finding someone who has the sort of flaws which are compatible with your own flaws.
As for AJ... he was such a nancy-boy! When I first saw Empire Records I loved Marc cos he was a goofball stoner but last time I watched it I liked Lucas the most. Ahh a lanky geek who uses big words.
As for AJ... he was such a nancy-boy!
When I first saw Empire Records I loved Marc cos he was a goofball stoner but last time I watched it I liked Lucas the most. Ahh a lanky geek who uses big words.
Mary Poppins
Bluelighter
geeks are the best.
flaws are the best.
i am now employing UAN to simply speak on my behalf
except that i will still reiterate everything she says for kicks!!!
flaws are the best.
i am now employing UAN to simply speak on my behalf
except that i will still reiterate everything she says
for kicks!!!
astrosmurf
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Aug 8, 2001
- Messages
- 3,633
^^ he was all philosophical too! "what's with today today?"
m4dd0g
Bluelighter
- Joined
- Aug 20, 2005
- Messages
- 3,664
Unfortunately, and as much as i wish it wasnt, i dont think its just Hollywood ideals.katmeow said:
We wouldnt be a successful species if there wasnt a mating urge.
And its a side effect of having larger brains that children are hopeless for longer, hence the pairing (or tribal) urge.
If we didnt have language, culture, traditions ... these things would still exist
Having said that, Hollywood does lay it on thick, but its just drawing on existing cultural tendencies which -i believe- are more exaggerated now than ever in history.
katmeow said:
That is what I'm like.
I pretty much know I'm here for the long haul
.I've noticed I tend to get along with girls as 'friends only' great (Especially one's that already have boyfriends,because I'm NEVER interested in anything more and same with them.).But,if I'm interested in anything more with a girl,she won't be.
After having falling hard for a girl I've known for a bit.I've got my heart broken again,hence her and I don't talk anymore(Had a falling out regarding this,among other things
.).I've been hurt too much NOW and this is the last straw.I basically give up.I have been single for along time,years in fact. I guess I'm NOT cut out for romantic relationships.Thus,why I've been in this thread single for a long time..........................................