Bluelight Singles - from begining to end! don't we love the merge feature!

[miss apple]

I was out with a male friend on Saturday night who has been here for 3 weeks now. He was with a girl he met at work and as of yesterday, they're now together.
So in my sad and feeling sorry for myself mood that this event put me in, I did a quick inventory and realised I am the *only* person out of my group of friends who is single. Not only am I single now, but I have been consistently single since I've been friends with these people.
pinger, pillcat and mona all now have partners (we were all single when we met). My other friends who are now part of our group were in relationships when we started hanging out together.
All 3 of my flatmates are in relationships. My only friends in London are now in relationships. I am the only single person in my team at work.
It's no wonder I'm feeling sorry for myself. Being single has *sooo* stopped being fun.

 

[djcolen]

Couldn't agree more Miss Apple. I just want a few single friends to hang with, just to make life easier. Sounds selfish i guess, but thats the way it is. I have some mad friends who are in relationships, but its just not the same as a single friend. But i guess from this thread you can make some new single friends.

DJC

 

[Tarsarlan]

When it comes to just hanging around and spending time with people, I would rather be with single people, because it can get too painful to see all your friends in a relationship (still happy for them tho, don't get me wrong, just not happy for me...) when you're not...
However, when I'm going out somewhere and it's with a bunch of male friends, I'd much rather they were happily and firmly attached to someone else, because that way when I meet a nice girl, my friends won't sweep them off their feet before I get a chance... I'm not the kinda guy to jump on a girl as soon as I spot her, and I'm not willing to pretend to want her that much just to get her attention. Thank you but I'm just not that forward and I'd be fake if I tried to be...
Anyway, I'm still not too bothered by my single status, and I've been thinking about that a little lately... It seems that when I have no real interest in someone, that's when I don't really mind being single... The worst times have been when there's someone I've just met who I'm interested in, or when there's someone I like who is unavailable, for whatever reason... At the moment there is no-one whom I greatly desire (if only blue kitten didn't live in Brisbane... ooops, did I actually type that?

), tho there are a few nice girls I've met in the last few months whom I wouldn't mind getting to know better... There just isn't the desire to make the first move, and while that might mean I miss out on a good opportunity, am I supposed to go for every girl I meet if I think there might be a possiblity of an attraction developing? ...Call me insensitive, but that sounds like either desparation, or just plain sleeziness... So what to do? *Warning: cliche ahead!* Get to know as many people as possible and see what happens, and when the feeling is right, make that move...

 

[BliSSS*]

Been singles about 3 weeks now & it's interesting.
I was with my boy for 16 mth & before that he was my best friend, so it's kind of boring, sitting at home instead of hanging out every night...
I don't really want another relationship, but only because I got on so well with him, everything just worked & I don't think I'll feel that again...
The longest I've been without a boy in the last 3/1/2 yrs is 1 month, so this might do me good, I just with that my other 2 best friends hadn't moved to UK yet!!
jaX*

 

[icantfeelmylegs]

Oh the single life.. it's good for a while.. then after long enough.. it's like a good kick in the wossnames. One has an awful lot of time on ones hands...
Tarsarlan.. once again you have hit the nail bang on the head about this and i'm just typing in the hope that I quickly come up with one salient point you haven't manged to succinctly point out yet.
nope. thinking to no avail..

 

[Adz-O-Rama]

on the plus side!....being single all this time has got me out of seeing titanic, city of angelz..and all those other manditory "couple" movies that a guy wouldnt go to see by his own free will...but is dragged along to kicking and screaming by a gurl

.....i wonder if i can go thru my entire life without having to see titanic..*fingers crossed*

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StOp ThE WorlD...i WaNNa gEt oFF

 

[Remmy]

I went out with a girl for 3 years, but the last year all I wanted to do was be single. I started cheating and finally got what I wished for.
For the first six months being single was fantastic. Going home with randoms, getting smutts from those girls that I was attracted to but could never do anything about, being the macho "player" that my friends wanted me to be.
But now that final (indefinate cycle) has kicked in. I really miss the comfort of having someone to share things with. I miss kissing someone and telling them that I love them (or at least mean it).
Problem is that I am so picky. I have lost my ex forever and now I cant find anyone that compares. She was not the best looking girl Ive ever been with, but now Ive come to realise how little that means.
Im starting to wonder if I will ever find anyone as special as she was.
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"The who?...who cares! Hope I die before I get old!" Sounds from the lillipad, Big Day Out 2000.

 

[dangermouse]

im single. out of an off/on 8 year relationship about a year ago, so being "officially" single (not just on the rebound) is quite hard for me.
you want the secrets? i've read enough books to know what the secret to seduction is... if you walk into any place looking lonely the girls will smell it on you, the art of seduction is indifference.
how to become indifferent? get a girlfriend ;-) its the biggest gag of all, when you're with someone you are settled, happy and sexually satisfied. you are therefore attractive because of these changes.
it sucks ;-)
along with this lovely catch22 package there's also the downside of your view on your female friends turning sexual constantly ;-)
i just want a bunch of girls i can call friends! but im not one to turn down an orgy either ;-)
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..dangermouse..
.you've gotta lose it.
.to find it.

 

[miss apple]

Remmy - "I went out with a girl for 3 years, but the last year all I wanted to do was be single. I started cheating and finally got what I wished for."
Why do guys do this? If you wanted to be single why didn't you just break up with her instead of making it worse by cheating on her?
My ex didn't cheat on me but he *told* me he did cause he knew I would break up with him. Until I said I would forgive him which forced him into actually making a decision.
One day, one guy will prove me wrong but at the moment, I can't get the thought out of mind that all men are bastards. Sorry guys. I have not met one boy who has said he wouldn't cheat on a girl. It sucks.

 

[djcolen]

Miss Apple I am one of those few guys that would never cheat on a girl, and the reason is i have had it done to me 3 times now. =( Well the last one wasn't cheating, but less than 2 weeks after we broke up she was with another guy, so it may of well been cheating. I had the opertunity to cheat on my last g/f, but when i'm with a girl, i'm with her and her only. I'm not an overly attractive guy, but i have great blue eyes, cute butt (so i've been told) and am genuinely a nice and caring guy. But in order for that to come out you have to be friends with someone for a long time.
Tars i'm with you on everything you've said so far.

We have very similar beliefs.
I'll be very interested to see how many of us come back after NY and are NOT single anymore.

Some have started alrady.
Adios all~
DJC

 

[Miss Peks]

I agree with most of what everyone has said on here, and I am getting close to the conclusion that all Men are bastards (of course it doesn't help when your Mum tells you this), but I still have a small hope that maybe I'm wrong, just maybe???????
I have been single now for about 11 months and I've had enough, but I don't want to just go out with anyone. I would rather stay single than go out with someone who wasn't on the same wavelength as me.
So on that note I think I'll be single for quite some time yet.

 

[Tarsarlan]

DJC and ICFML (or erm, Jules

): I think the 3 of us should head out somewhere together and see if our combined personalities are enough to attract at least one girl...
Remmy: The first part of your post makes you sound like the typical male... braindead and only able to think about sex. The second half helps improve that image a bit, but the start will always attract more attention, disgusted attention ... I really wish guys wouldn't say shit like that, even if they're joking, 'cos it makes people think what miss apple said, that all men are bastards...
...I'm out to prove that there's at least one who isn't...

 

[Adz-O-Rama]

Tars..that reminds me of the seinfeld episode..where george and jerry team up to date the girl....george is like the secretary

..jerry the face of the operation.....hmmmmm mabey with the 3 of you...you could make the perfect male.....mite just be enuff to hold the girls attention!..woohoo

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StOp ThE WorlD...i WaNNa gEt oFF

 

[miss apple]

tarlasan and djcolen....you're both helping to change my 'all men are bastards' thoughts. But it's one thing to find people like you exist, it's completely another to actually *meet* people like you. I *did* have in the back of my mind to move to Melbourne when I come home though.....

pekkie...it's almost 2 years and counting for this single girly (my ex and I broke up over the phone on Boxing day). I must admit the first 6-12 months was spent absolutely hating men due to my last fuckwit of a boyfriend (who I must mention is now living in London and flirting with me outrageously). And nothing turns men off than a man-hating-woman!! The next 8 months was spent enjoying being single and not looking at all. It's really only in the past 3 months that I've been craving company of a significant other. So I guess I can't really complain.

 

[Trouble]

So how many of you singles are no longer single since the weekend?
I'm interested in these 'all men are bastards' comments. What do you think about female 'bastards' then, assuming that a 'bastard' is someone who doesn't mind a bit of nooky on the side? Just asking.. honest

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~trouble
(with a pop-o-matic bubble)

 

[Tarsarlan]

*laughs, then sighs at Trouble and shakes his head, all with a smile he can't quite manage to wipe off his face*
You don't hear much about that kinda thing do you? Girls cheating on guys that is... Yet DJC is proof that it does happen. I think it's just as bad as guys cheating, it should be no different for anyone regarless of gender, age, religion, personal beliefs, etc... The large majority of society (or at least the majority of society which I come into contact with) believe that any one person should only have one partner at any one time. For good reason too because of all the shit that happens when any more than two people enter the equation. I think it is possible for relationships to work with more than three people, but it'd take some very special people, and with society looking down on them constantly, it wouldn't be worth it...
Eeek! Threesomes! Look what you've done Trouble! I swear I'm gonna mark down the day you joined Bluelight as the day I started my slide into oblivion...

Miss apple: You know you'll be more than welcome down here if you do move to Melbourne...
*sends miss apple a cd containing subliminal messages which will increase her desire to come back to Australia and live in Melbourne*

[This message has been edited by Tarsarlan (edited 14 December 2000).]

 

[Remmy]

Sorry but I didnt mean for the first part of my post to sound like that. I meant for it to sound cynical (is that the right word??). It was not a brag but a self attack.
I am not proud of what I did. Also I never actually told her that I cheated and she never found out. She broke up with me because I treated her really badly for a whole year and she had her suspicions.
Theres actually alot more to the story too. She cheated on me while she was in Europe a year beforehand. I could never forgive her but I guess I loved her too much to let her go. So my way of dealing with it was cheating. Lots.
Looking back it was the most cowardly thing I could have done. I should have had more courage and broken up with her, or had even more courage and forgiven her.
But the past is the past. Now I just want to find someone as special as her.

 

[KompleX]

Tarsalan u genious!!!
Im gonna make a track with subliminal messages

Man, im so full of good ideas

By the way, Chix cheat way more than guys do, and chix have way more bitch fights etc.

 

[Adz-O-Rama]

yehh ease off with the all men are bastards routine!.....ya forgetting bout all those women..who string a guy along...take his gifts..go on his dates..with the full knowldge they dont want anything further....but..they wait until the guy has his hopes up..to tell him..nahhhh im not looking for that kinda thing right now..least men more often then not..are straight out with wot they want....and in return are expected to be mind readers...sypering thru little clues and actions to see wots wrong..any one ever had the...."wots wrong?"...."well if you dont know..im not going to tell you!"..i hate that

..communtication is the BIG key...but umm yer...its bad to generalise..saying allll men are bastards, men and woman are as bad as each other..ya get ya good ones and ya bad ones..neway..ive babbledlong enuff..im sure ya see wot im tryn to say

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StOp ThE WorlD...i WaNNa gEt oFF

 

[Remmy]

Been playing the game alot lately and I can certainly tell you that women are often just as bad as men, if not worse.
The other week I took a girl out on a first date to one of Perths nicest restaurants and spent a fortune. Later that night we ended up sleeping together.
That was on a thurday. Met her out clubbing on the Saturday. Then she started playing all these mind games like flirting with other guys in front of me and telling me that she could get any guy she wants bla bla bla.
Now usually I enjoy this sort of mind game thing, but with this girl I wanted it to be different. I dont often take first dates to $200.00 a meal restaurants! So I started getting pissed off. In the end I told her where to go and then she tells me that the night before (the friday) she fucked someone else anyway and didnt give a shit! Apparently she has about 3 guys on the go.
Oh well, my only savouring thought is that I also rooted someone else on the Fri as well! ha ha.