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  • BDD Moderators: Keif’ Richards

Benzos long term.

I am taking benzos daily for a decade, before than that on and off .

I actually stopped few times, with some difficulty (slow tapering + clorazepate. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clorazepate ) . when the initial endless wd wore off, I was fucking depressed and couldnt do shit because of hardcore anxiety, I let it be for few months then went back on it because I couldnt do basic stuff, like eat, go out, shower, do anything . just permanent crushing anxiety, guilt, remorse, flashbacks...
I got PTSD. So I went back on them each time.

The thing that fucked me up (like 6 years ago) the most is when I went into grams of clonazolam, etizolam, flualprazolam, flubromazolam .. That shit fucks you up by exploding your tolerance through the roof. When I went out of clonazolam the first time I really thought I was gonna kill myself. not even mentionning the overdoses on them. good luck finding a legal benzo that match the potency to replace those -zolams. I used to abuse them my memory and coordination where totally fucked up. (obviously I had a 0.001 scale but still DONT DO THIS DONT START buying pure powder for fuck sake)

I also got seizure problem, so there is that too.

I obviously don't recommend it, I got memory problems sometimes and feel like I wont be able to stop them ever. But thy keep me from drinking alcohol, stabilize me and help for my crippling anxiety, depression, dark thoughts etc. To me, actual alcoholism or daily anti psychotics are more dangerous.

I am on 20 mg diazepam daily sometimes (but rarely) 10 mg more . To me its needed and I dont do them to get high, just to go forward in my life and not staying stuck in the past. I dont feel them much anymore. that'really medical at this point, no recreationnal effects at all.

I think if you need them and stay on stable dose for years, you don't feel too much the side effects at least for me. But yeah quitting them can be incredibly difficult and dangerous as fuck.

Take care..

edit: disclaimer on grams of powders
 
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It's like a payday loan on your mental health.
Oof I felt that in my soul from the days of my benzo abuse. People are gonna do what they are gonna do but god I wish they could just see a snapshot into the future when they are in withdrawal and freaking out because they don’t want to have a seizure
 
Yeah, they are a nightmare if abused. However, physical dependence can develop very quickly and as mentioned above are a nightmare to get off, of.
 
In terms of meds that help with social anxiety, in my experience propranolol is the most effective. It doesn't sedate or blunt you like antipsychotics or benzo's do and is not addictive. It simply allows you to remains calm and level and represent the best version of your self in stressful situations. I'm in the UK btw and prescribe it for my patients regularly. Its in the British National Formulary (BNF) for this reason also.
Hey I messaged my gp surgery today about my situation (praopnolol prescription 2017-2024 untill no longer allowed to be prescribed by gps for anxeity purposess). I say based on my atrial fibrillation (admitted to hospital before with it and grandad also suffered with it) could i get a prescription for that. They made me a 9am appointment tommorow. Being a doctor youself whats the best way to go about talking in a way hes likely to give me the prescription. I dont want it to look like im trying to maniulate him into a propanolol prescription. Dcotors also from my exp can be very iffy and overlysensitive about the things you say to them (not talking being rude just saying or asking certaing questions).

Should I just talk about my atrial fib+family history and he knows allready i used propanolol fine for 7 years based on my medical record infront of hihm?
 
Yeah, they are a nightmare if abused. However, physical dependence can develop very quickly and as mentioned above are a nightmare to get off, of.
Yes lol 2 months of using them worked up my tolerance to the point I was swallowing 10-15 10mg valiums before the gym in the moning about 3 days a week. Stupid me didnt sit and think taking sucha big dose I still have huge amounts in my system taking days off. Finally a week after stopping a massive panic attack hit me. Sat on my sofa and felt like I was drowning and couldnt breathe, never experienced anything like it.
 
I just have to reiterate, I highly recommend against anyone buying large quantities of Benzodiazepines, especially as loose powder. I´ve never known anyone whp was better off after buying a couple of grams of Clonazolam. You have the double-jeapordy, as you can take too much and do something stupid or dangerous and also, you have to deal with withdrawal if and when you run out. If you ever do purchase Benzodiazepins, at the very least, I recommend buying them in prearranged dosing units.
 
I think anyone who’s stay on benzos long term will deal with increased baseline anxiety and worsening memory at a minimum. They made me super fucking depressed. Glad to be free of those. I was horrible though. Even low doses make me mad depressed for days after though. I was on 10mg a day of RCs at one point though. Etizolam is the only benzo I ever took which seemed to be free from the depression side effect. By far my favorite, too bad it isn’t available as it once was.
 
i was prescribed Benzodiazepines for anxiety for over twenty five years.

Like the experience chronic opiate patents experience where their pain experience increases but the pain medication still treats the pain. I think that benzoes can do the same thing taken chronically.. i’m off for well over a decade and experience almost no anxiety.. while when i was treated with benzodiazepines my anxiety was significant. There a ton of reasons it might not have been the benzodiazepines but my theory is they were behind it.

Also when i finally jumped i was in acute withdrawal for 15 months strait.. i can still picture exactly where i was at pretty a photographic memory when finally i made it through. The withdrawal after all that just stopped dead.. crazy.
 
I just have to reiterate, I highly recommend against anyone buying large quantities of Benzodiazepines, especially as loose powder. I´ve never known anyone whp was better off after buying a couple of grams of Clonazolam. You have the double-jeapordy, as you can take too much and do something stupid or dangerous and also, you have to deal with withdrawal if and when you run out. If you ever do purchase Benzodiazepins, at the very least, I recommend buying them in prearranged dosing units.

Oh of course I edited my original post. My bad
 
I take a low dose benzo daily as prescribed daily for decades. It still works for sleep and anxiety. I am trying to take it less and eventually quit because of the stigma (every doctor except the one who prescribes it will assume you are drug seeking pos and not take you seriously). And this stuff sure does not make you any smarter!
same here. Earlier in life I was on Xanax 6mg for 5-6 years in my late 20's. I am 48 now.

I take Ativan 2mg and I also take Clonidine 0.9mg daily with Vistaril PAM 200mg, and Busbar 30mg.

This combo works better than Xanax 6mg everyday.

as far as psych drugs, Haldol would be my choice. If Droperidol was an out-patient thing, I could choose Droperidol over Haldol and Ativan.
 
as far as psych drugs, Haldol would be my choice. If Droperidol was an out-patient thing, I could choose Droperidol over Haldol and Ativan.
For me, Haldol (haloperidol) was a terrible drug. I think I took 1 mg, and felt like as if all the good things in life had been taken away from me. Never took it twice.
 
I don't if benzos are as physiologically damaging as booze. I don't think they are. That's just my opinion. Possibly more psychologically damaging.
More Psychological then Physical your reply meant. Concerning Benzo s ?

After getting physically addicted to Ethanol. Which form s after mental habitation.
Ime Benzo s are way less dangerous. But without being called expert that just my experience or 2 cents. Took Benzo s since internet never got addicted.

Dr s did say that it never happened though waited for WD s. Still waiting. Benzo s.
Are imo less dangerous never had a WD from them, that might have changed my opinion. Over a great part of the nation addicted to them. I used them wisely having read on Bluelight many years about them.

The main reason when in insomnia no dr. prescribe s them. DIY
 
For me, Haldol (haloperidol) was a terrible drug. I think I took 1 mg, and felt like as if all the good things in life had been taken away from me. Never took it twice.
I love Haldol 20mg-30mg PO doses for mania.
I also love Haldol IV 10mg with Droperidol IV 5mg. This is what I request after surgery for 24hrs on top of acute Diluadid every 4hrs
 
I don't think benzos loose their anti-panic efficacy with continued, controlled use.

But I only take twice a week. 1.5 mg Ativan. Been on that for a few months, was on 1 mg for 6 years. Was on .5 mg for 5 years before that.
 
More Psychological then Physical your reply meant. Concerning Benzo s ?

After getting physically addicted to Ethanol. Which form s after mental habitation.
Ime Benzo s are way less dangerous. But without being called expert that just my experience or 2 cents. Took Benzo s since internet never got addicted.

Dr s did say that it never happened though waited for WD s. Still waiting. Benzo s.
Are imo less dangerous never had a WD from them, that might have changed my opinion. Over a great part of the nation addicted to them. I used them wisely having read on Bluelight many years about them.

The main reason when in insomnia no dr. prescribe s them. DIY
I meant that benzos can be more damaging to a person's mind and emotions if abused but even then don't tend to destroy the physical body like alcohol does.
 
I meant that benzos can be more damaging to a person's mind and emotions if abused but even then don't tend to destroy the physical body like alcohol does.
Read psychologically twice, my bad you wrote it once and physiologically.
So you post now makes total sense. I should get my eye s checked professionally.

👓 they deter more rapid then my mind is willing to admit. :whistle:
 
i was prescribed Benzodiazepines for anxiety for over twenty five years.

Like the experience chronic opiate patents experience where their pain experience increases but the pain medication still treats the pain. I think that benzoes can do the same thing taken chronically.. i’m off for well over a decade and experience almost no anxiety.. while when i was treated with benzodiazepines my anxiety was significant. There a ton of reasons it might not have been the benzodiazepines but my theory is they were behind it.

Also when i finally jumped i was in acute withdrawal for 15 months strait.. i can still picture exactly where i was at pretty a photographic memory when finally i made it through. The withdrawal after all that just stopped dead.. crazy.
What about low does use every day for years, and no issues.

Also you have gone down in strenght of type and amount of Benzos by half voluntarily?
 
What about low does use every day for years, and no issues.

Also you have gone down in strenght of type and amount of Benzos by half voluntarily?
idk personally about low dose.. my dose was therapeutic.. not to say i never took more then prescribed as i usually did making it rough waiting for the script to come through.

No i’m totally off now for over a decade. Yes it was voluntary.

My story is i kicked 270 mg per day roxy, 80 mg methadone and 4 mgs zan starting the benzodiazepines detox a week into the opiate detox .. so i jumped the roxy and methadone one week before i jumped the benzodiazepines . I’m certainly not saying this is the way to go, but that was over twelve years ago.. we know allot more now. It’s pretty much a long time ago.

Really pretty dangerous.. i rolled it with pretty much clonidine and that’s about it.. because i had been on the benzos for over two decades the withdrawals were viscous. But in 2012 or so the myth that methadone maintenance patients were pretty much lifetime patients was really strong and promoted in scientific as well as medical believes and literature. So i attributed the severe length of the severe withdrawal length tho the methadone.

These takes have obviously been debunked or at least seriously questioned in science, real life and also medical opinions since then.

but back then i was working off what we all believed was fact.. just didn’t turn out to true.

live and learn right…

what i do think from my personal experience and research is trying to use chronic chemical therapy to treat certain conditions esp pain and anxiety likely will lead to a dynamic where the condition we are looking to treat is both treated but also exacerbated by the use of opiates and benzodiazepines. I think they are amazing medications, bur i would only consider using them in short durations or extreme situations.

i just think they will automatically turn on us in a very devious way used chronically.
 
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Has anybody just stayed on benzodiazepines long term and not had issues? Or do they basically just stop working eventually. My whole drug issues in the first place started because ive never felt normal/totally comfortable in social situations (I think im probably pretty autistic tbh I have multiple symptoms of it and have been asked my people if I am) and im at the point where im thinking about just using benzos forever so I can live the way I want to instead of being handicapped by my discomfort in social situations.

Has anybody done daily dosing long term ? Ive tried using benzos twice a week and it doesnt work because rebound anxiety means you are worst a day or two after using them, so maybe just using them and accepting being dependant is the better option now.
I've a bit of exp with most benzos and would say it's really a take them or don't situation. If life is so hard you need them , use them but beware nothing comes for free . If you can use only once in a blue moon when things are really overwhelming great . But once that threshold is broken 6 weeks a year ...more
Then the bill can be more than people are willing to pay . There are better ways . But that decision is up to you alone .
Good luck .
 
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