Benzo withdrawal, nothing helps!

[carson35]

I've been in a horrific benzo withdrawal for almost 16 months now. At 14 months out I got worse! I've been bedridden with all sorts of shit. I've had every test there is and clean bill of health. Is there anything I can do or take to help with this shit? I was using depakote but it started fucking up my liver. I think it helped not sure cause my brain is so fucked up. I have keppra and gabapentin. The gabapentin seemed to give me anxiety though. I have seriously thought about taking more benzos or getting drunk to try and end this. Anyone have experience with protracted agonizing benzo withdrawal.

I have come off different benzos 5 different times in my life but never had a problem like this. This time it just rewired my brain. I have also come off a huge opiate addiction 5 years ago and it was nothing compared to this. I also quit method and coke another time in my life and that like giving up lemonade for water compared to this.

 

[methamaniac]

Sounds like you need to see a neurologist.
Thats a long time to suffer from after effects from benzo use, but I have heard of people experiencing side effects from long term benzo use for a long dam time. Stevie Nicks said they screwed her way up.
Have you tried a anti depressant?
I always used neurontin when I kicked, but I never used benzos for more than two three months straight. Ive heard the horror stories of benzo wd a few times.
I feel for ya

 

[carson35]

Sounds like you need to see a neurologist.
Thats a long time to suffer from after effects from benzo use, but I have heard of people experiencing side effects from long term benzo use for a long dam time. Stevie Nicks said they screwed her way up.
Have you tried a anti depressant?
I always used neurontin when I kicked, but I never used benzos for more than two three months straight. Ive heard the horror stories of benzo wd a few times.
I feel for ya

I'm thinking of trying neurontin but it kind of tweaked me last time. I've been to a neurologist. Got a clean bill of health. She told me to see a shrink! I have paxil but im scared to try it. Seems lots of things I try make me worse. My cns is fried. Thanks for the reply

 

[methamaniac]

No prob, paxil is what they usually give in your sitch from what I hear.
16 months.....id give it a shot!
I was always scared to try them too but if I wasnt getting any better after that long I would be mainlining them (j.k.)
Neurontin at about 800 mg always took care of the problem with my crazy firing brain.

No offense to them but shrinks always seemed like a waste of time and money to me.
I already know the roots of my problems.
And its frustrating as hell when you know you're out of whack chemically from drug abuse and they try to act like it's some deep underlying unresolved psychological issue causing you to feel shitty. Srry Doc, my childhood was the shit.
I used drugs cause I liked getting high.
No rocket science to it.
Having said that, they can prescibe anti depressants and they may or may not work.
If your in bad mental pain for that long might be worth a shot.
Mental pain can be dibilating and frustrating.?
Best wishes on finding relief

 

[carson35]

Ya I'm pretty sick of all doctors to be honest. They can hook you on shit but don't know how to get you off it. The thing of it is, I never once abused the valium lol! I abused the shit out of painkillers and while I went through a good 2 weeks of hell I was ok after that. Two weeks after I got off valium, I was just getting started in hell! Thanks again, I Ight try a low dose of paxil.

 

[straightrazor]

What dose of benzos were you on and for how long? Did you cold turkey or taper?

You mentioned you got worse at 14 months, what kind of symptoms are you dealing with?

Benzo withdrawal isn't something that can be fixed with pills but you can medicate some of the symptoms.

 

[cook]

Dude, I cant even believe how much that situation must suck.

Have you tried any supplements? Do you eat healthy etc? Key thing for any recovery. For me the most effective single thing for bzd wd is good form of magnesium (anything other than oxide), in large doses. Give it a try if you havent already. This is pretty basic though. Also you might want to try picamilon and/or l-theanine daily before going to any real meds.

Dont lose hope.

 

[sieppy]

I've been in a horrific benzo withdrawal for almost 16 months now. At 14 months out I got worse! I've been bedridden with all sorts of shit. I've had every test there is and clean bill of health. Is there anything I can do or take to help with this shit? I was using depakote but it started fucking up my liver. I think it helped not sure cause my brain is so fucked up. I have keppra and gabapentin. The gabapentin seemed to give me anxiety though. I have seriously thought about taking more benzos or getting drunk to try and end this. Anyone have experience with protracted agonizing benzo withdrawal.

I have come off different benzos 5 different times in my life but never had a problem like this. This time it just rewired my brain. I have also come off a huge opiate addiction 5 years ago and it was nothing compared to this. I also quit method and coke another time in my life and that like giving up lemonade for water compared to this.

I would stay away from any substances that could mess up your Gaba receptors. Reading other peoples stories helps (check out benzobuddies forum). Try relaxation techniques.
From my own experience I can recommend meditation with Holosync.

My best wishes

 

[carson35]

Thanks everyone. I've been on benzobuddies and it helps. Just thought I'd check around other places too. I guess the only thing that will help is time and maybe a clean diet. It sure does suck though.

 

[carson35]

I tried magnesium and it made me worse. It gave me restlessness and i tried several different forms in different doses. I've damn near tried every supplement.

I was on 30 mg and tapered down to 4 mg over 4 years! I couldn't get lower so I ct and was put on phenobarbital and depakote. I ct the depakote 7 months ago and phenobarbital was only used for the first week off valium.

I was healing and feeling pretty good till 14.5 month mark. I'm worse than acute! I have burning skin, tinnitus, dizziness, adrenaline rushes, crazy thoughts, anxiety, shakes, chills, body aches, derealization, sensitive to smells and sounds, insomnia, inner vibrations, disoriented, seeing things, seeing blue flashes of light and black spots. Man! I'm sure there are more but that's all I can think of right now. I'm bedridden or couch bound. To top it off I threw out my lower back yesterday and can't take shit for the pain!

The only thing I did different was drink a shit load of peppermint tea 3 weeks leading up to this. Everyday 4x a day. It was making me feel better and I actually craved it. Could it have been that?

 

[neversickanymore]

Hey carson, welcome to Bluelight

Sorry you are suffering

The only thing I did different was drink a shit load of peppermint tea 3 weeks leading up to this. Everyday 4x a day. It was making me feel better and I actually craved it. Could it have been that?

You were probably feeling better because you were becoming so low on adrenalin. So while it spiked your adrenalin and made you feal better temporarily it likely helped further the adrenal fatigue.

Caffeine's strongest effects are felt for about an hour after taking it, but some effects last 4 to 6 hours. Caffeine causes increased neuron firing in the brain which the pituitary gland perceives as an emergency and therefore causes the adrenal glands to release adrenaline.

http://brown.edu/Student_Services/H.../alcohol,_tobacco,_&_other_drugs/caffeine.php

I actually craved it

Caffeine also increases dopamine levels -- the neurotransmitter that is affected by drugs like amphetamines and heroin. Obviously, it does this on a much reduced level from those drugs, but this may be <is> the source of caffeine's addictive quality.

http://brown.edu/Student_Services/H.../alcohol,_tobacco,_&_other_drugs/caffeine.php

I was healing and feeling pretty good till 14.5 month mark.

Here could be one explanation. I think you may be suffering from adrenal fatigue caused by the lengthy detox and/or very high levels of stress.

I'm not a doctor, but this is where I would be looking to try and find relief. I hope you do!!

Adrenal insufficiency
Diseases of the Adrenal Gland

Exercise is going to be key. But you need to start very slow. If start fast or push to hard its going to cause adrenal release. This will feel good for a while, but have negative effects on you and your recovery, just like the cafine did.

So you will need to take it slow at first and slowly build up as you get healthier and healthier. Exercise will increase production of adrenalin, but to much/hard will cause it to be released.

Exercise and Brain Neurotransmission
Adrenal Fatigue and Exercise By: Michael Lam, MD, MPH and Dorine Lam, RD, MS, MPH

I would also have your testosterone levels checked because

The adrenal cortex is devoted to production of corticosteroid and androgen (e-g testosterone) hormones.

Adrenal gland

I would also have your vitamine D levels checked.

I had a very significant brain disruption as well and I ended up having very low levels of vitamine D. You may wish to research weather or not any correlation between vit d and adrenal diseases has been found.

I would take a high quality multivitamin.
When you are able to sleep well I would really concentrate on getting very good natural sleep.
I would consider seeing a cognitive behavioral therapist if you are still facing a great deal of untreated anxiety and/or stress.
I would consider taking up meditation

Hope you find the relief your looking for.

 

[ParappaTheRapper]

I took benzos for an extended period of time, tapered poorly and quickly, then got PAWS where I went through the whole valerian, kava, theanine, etc route.

I am actually back on benzos now, actually a higher dose than I ever took.

Its important to seperate i now realize, what is a direct withdrawal symptom, and what are things in you the benzos hid.

Many perceptions, disorders, or even physical stuff can be covered up by benzo use.

When taking benzos all those problems tend to fester and develop without realizing under the benzos and come out during withdrawal.

Magnesium and L-theanine are your best natural routes.

 

[Smoky]

Have you tried any mood stabilizers? Those have helped me in the past come off cns depressants. atypicals mostly. I was low vit D, began having autoimmune problems too. I would check out your adrenal and thyroid. Mine was sky high started attacking my organs around it…
I'm not a doctor but cns depressants gave me major health issues. Good for you for getting off of those…. they were the hardest for me, even more so than heroin.

Look up L Glutamine. Does wonders!

 

[carson35]

Thanks guys. I never had anything like this before benzos. I was given benzos for sleep due to debilitating back pain from a failed fusion. I never had any anxiety or any of these symptom. An addiction specialist told me it could take 3 plus years for unlucky people like me.

The peppermint tea is naturally caffeine free. In fact I can have any caffeine because it make me worse. I know that menthol can mess with gaba receptors and also act like a calcium channel blocker. I just have a hard time believing that could have done this.

My vitamin D level was 23 last time I had it checked. I tried to take it and it caused anxiety. I'm just so sensitive to everything.

I haven't had my adrenals checked in a while but my thyroid is fine.

 

[neversickanymore]

23 is pretty low. Did you take the vit d with magnesium as this prevents vit d from causing anxiety in many people.

My mistake about the tea.

I would consider the Testosrone and adrenal level test.

I also agree w smoky that a mood stabilizer like lamictal could also benifit you.

 

[Monkeygrrrl]

Not sure where in the world you are carson35, but In Australia we have a specific program called "DAWN" (drug n alcohol withdrawal network) where the staff (registered drs and nurses) visit you at home and assist you through your withdrawal. I was friends with the guys who started it years ago and they agreed that coming off benzos is one of the worst and most dangerous, so you have to be really careful, and having medical staff monitoring your progress is really important.
Like I said, not sure where you are, but maybe there's a similar service/agency near you that could help you out? DAWN began in Perth, West Australia but have branched further out now I think.
Anyway best of luck buddy, I feel for you - benzo hanging is the absolute PITS ;(

 

[carson35]

No I didn't take the D with magnesium I might try that. My testosterone was normal so I'll get my adrenals tested again just to see. I was given keppra but I'm scared to take it. I was on depakote and that seemed to help but trashed my liver.

I live in the United states. They don't have anything here like that. Insurance won't pay for shit here. In other words you have to be rich or suffer. Even the addiction specialist I went to only takes cash.

 

[Foreigner]

I've been bedridden with all sorts of shit. I've had every test there is and clean bill of health..

Can you be more specific about the symptoms you have, and the tests you've received? That would help a lot.

I know you said benzo withdrawal but at 14 months in it might have different features than what everyone is assuming.

Are you just chronically fatigued? Brain zaps? What is it?

 

[carson35]

I have burning skin, anxiety, insomnia, tinnitus, flu like sx, sensitive to sound and smell, dizziness, adrenaline rushes, restlessness, depression, suicidal ideation, crazy racing thoughts, muscle twitches, disorientation, confusion, memory loss, shakes, chills, inner vibrations. The symptoms are pretty constant but increase and decrease in intensity.

 

[[email protected]]

I have been off 8 mg daily of ativan fir 25 months and worse now than ever. I have muscles so overexcited that when i stand i feel light i am made out of concrete and have been unable to walk more that a few feet for two years. I still get panic in open areas,like when i attempt to go on my yard,and tinnitus requiring a masking device.i was given a 4 day detox in the hospital..I asked my doctor after a couple of months to re instate me and do a taper. His answer was no. After 25 months now should i try another dr,and re instate? I keep hoping i will see improvement as most heal in their third year. Any suggestions?