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Benzo Tolerance and Other Issues

Benzo's are hard to kick if you keep taking them for years. It takes forever to get right. You are on a low dose. Quit while it's a lot easier. You are on a tapering down dose now. If not eventually you will be taking them just to not get the withdrawal effect, and won't get any anti anxiety effect. I know, over 35 years on benzo's, taken them all, started @ 2 X10 mg valiums (bid) then a couple years later was always on the strongest dose 3 x day (tid). My preference to get by on the last 10 years is 2mg (tid) of clonazepam. Before that 1mg tid of xanax and ativan 2mg, tid. before that. That is about 20 years there. I like the 50hr 1/2 life of clonazepam, and not the 18hrs on xanax (not to bad) and 12 hrs on lorazepam( works good, but to short). Makes you worry about the next dose time with short half lives. You are on very small doses, get off while you can. Nothing worst than benzo withdrawal.
 
even on codeine im just sitting here anxious as fuck. i took 2mg of lorazepam total today... i actually had to go in my moms purse and take two tablets... i feel really fiendish for doing that, but she doesn't even need the damn things and doesn't ever take them...

They wore off probably 5 or 6 hours ago... I wish i had more..

i'm having really intense chills even though its very warm in my room. my teeth are even chattering. yet i don't feel cold... just really shaky..
 
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Stay.Blazed.420 said:
even on codeine im just sitting here anxious as fuck. i took 2mg of lorazepam total today... i actually had to go in my moms purse and take two tablets... i feel really fiendish for doing that, but she doesn't even need the damn things and doesn't ever take them...

They wore off probably 5 or 6 hours ago... I wish i had more..
Click to expand...


once you have an established tolerance to benzos eating too many isnt as dangerous as not having any.

you may wish you had them now, but you will need them like food and water to stay alive.

_____________________________________________________
 
i couldn't take it anymore so i took a .5mg clonazepam and let it dissolve under my tongue.

also poured myself a rum and coke... and i NEVER drink.. First drink since march..
 
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well looks like me and the fiancee are breaking it off.. nothing is helping with this anxiety. I'm going to the clinic tomorrow to get more clonazepams cuz i'm gonna end up using them all tonight
 
i'm too paranoid to go see a different doctor. wouldn't that just make me look like a drug seeker?

down to .5 clone and a .5 loraz.. Today sucked and i was anxious all day (took half my prescribed dose when lately i've been taking 1.5x-2x my dose) and tomorrow is gonna be even worse.

does alcohol help? should i just take a shot when the (sub)w/d's start kicking in again?
 
i recently went 8 days w/o before a rebound from klonopin - took .25mg - then today 4 days later i had another rebound and took another .25 - it took 2 hours or so to start working it seemed, and this was sublingualy.

they werent symptoms i felt threatened by, but too much BS for now... it is a very distinctive-unique-to' order of symptoms that progress every time, im far too familiar with them by now - so i feel confident that the 'feelings' are psychical.


valerian has helped taking, which has only been twice the past ~3 weeks, but in the past would of done zip. i can tell when it comes on - a funky-sleepy feeling so i doubt ill even take more then 2 or 3 more for a month or so of the valerian, but it works for me now and is nice to have around.


i feel i should ask for valium in ways, it has been years with klonopin, but im so far out now i cant justify it...
:-\
 
hydroazuanacaine said:
no. maybe for like 20 minutes, but in the long run tying to drink through benzo WD makes it worse, IME. especially when you wake up the next day.
Click to expand...

i'm sitting here anxious as fuck with no desire to do anything but keep pressing the refresh button on my facebook to chat with someone or someone reply to this thread and im also trying to read up on recent news but i'm just ridden with horribly anxiety right now. especially since i'm experiencing some sub w/d's... If i were to go take 2 shots i'd get a decent buzz, and if i took a seroquel maybe finally for once i could fall asleep BEFORE 5am... which would be nice.

Is this a bad idea? I just want the anxiety to go away (as well as the insomnia) and to fall asleep and wake up. I hate this feeling.

i'm also out of cigarettes....... FUCKKKK
 
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nothing will really make the anxiety go away, except for accepting that fact -


hmm, why not?!?
gives this a listen and some thought-its a guided meditation of sorts-dont stare at the screen! heheh
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vHIyeQBgtOw

ive learned this with native american & hindu insight, general CBT and guided-hypnosis- and my own mossy irish crashing cliff side ;-D etc..... i just mean to say its there as is in many ways.

or, ive written numerous of my own as anyone can, and think/feel many out as well after familiarizing myself -- most nights actually i imagine my toes and the weight of my body on them-then my toes relaxing-next my feet and the walking around ive done and how now they can relax-up,, to just above the top of my head or be asleep after all, eventually.


sigh*
;)

its something, take it or leave it.


<3
 
ugh, why did i put this off for so long? what do i say to the clinic doctor tomorrow when i go in?
'hi, i used more than my prescribed dosage of this highly addictive (and for some people easily abused) drug, and now i ran out and am having horrible anxiety attacks? Can i have enough until my next refill?'

like i dunno what to say! and i don't even know what clinics are even going to be open tomorrow... I will probably have to go to the hospital or something.. Then anxiously wait in line for 3 hours before i see anyone.. I'm seriously contemplating stealing lorazepams from my moms purse tomorrow (because like i said she never takes them) but i am seriously way too dependent on these things... but they help me so much...

what should i say to the doctor if i do decide to go? I know being honest is smart but i don't know how to word it... I can't just go cold-turkey for 8 days.. fuuuck

i'm also going to call my buddies girlfriend and see if she can just sell me some of her clones because they work way better than the ativans do. my .5mg's do nothing if i take just one.

even my ocd is worse than before.
 
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i dont know what else is going on in your life, but you are being a bit dramatic about these pills. you are building this up, both in your head and on this board. i think the two are facilitating each other in a negative way. point is, get off bluelight and go running. weekends over, offices are open: either call your doc about the pills or don't.

and concerning your script, do you think you will not put yourself in this situation again if doctors give you more and an even larger amount of benzos? what happens when it isn't 2 1/2 months of a light dose?

no doubt your mental health problems are very real and very debilitating, but that is not a good reason to make things worse.
 
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I gotta agreee with Hydro, above - having got hooked on benzos a year ago, I've been trying to taper from high doses with some success (was gulping mgs of Klones and Xanax along with opiates after MY engagement also broke off, OP, so you have my sympathy: I've been there.)

Last night, after tapering down over the past few months from 40-60mgs diazepam/equivalent to 20mgs, I had a panic attack (rodent-phobic: mouse in my house, NO, it WAS NOT DT'S, it's happened before, just spent $100 on sonic screamers to cover every room), I ended up gulping 50mgs to try to calm down: I know this is going to make the next few days difficult, as I'm going to try to go straight back to 20mgs. Anyway, OP, the point is: don't up your doses, it just makes withdrawals worse, and benzo hell is more physically and psychically taxing than all but the worst opiate withdrawals. Three months of even low-dose will mean you'll need to taper off: some are more susceptible than others, but the physical addiction can kick in after only a few weeks of daily use.

Get enough to taper down, and get off them - otherwise, you'll find yourself looking at a long, slow taper schedule, and it isn't a nice way to live, especially for those of us who suffer from anxiety at the best of times.

Good luck, man - and like I said, I feel for you re. the engagement. I wish I hadn't turned to pills to get me through the aftermath of my last break-up: I kicked the painkillers, before I got too far in, but the benzos are a whole other story.

Keep posting, let us know how you're doing.
 
Today was fucking HORRIBLE.

i didn't take any klonopins or ativans and my whole body was restless. I felt the urge to keep stretching me legs, i had chills, i had a constant feeling that my heart wanted to beat out of my chest, i was CONSTANTLY paranoid, and bad thoughts would always overwhelm my brain and i cried a couple of times.

I did everything i could to relax. i even laid down and napped for 5 hours dosing in and out just trying to get past this horrible feeling. I don't have any money right now to go to a clinic and get a few extra clones until my next fill date (if a doctor would even do that) so i'm succumbing very low to possibly stealing some from my moms purse again. (i've only done this once) but i don't want to disrespect my mothers personal belongings but i feel like an addict. I can't believe how dependent i have become off of these in as little as two months. I kept trying to tell myself that half of the anxiety i am feeling is psychological but i can't convince myself.

These drugs are so peaceful when you're on them but it's absolute hell when you're off of them. I took .5mg ativan at 10:30pm (so an hour ago) and am feeling some relief (when usually .5 ativan does nothing by itself and only helps when used with klonopin or i take a full 1mg) but now i'm down to my last klonopin that i'm going to try and hold out on using for as long as possible tomorrow.

Should i call my psychiatrist and talk with him on the phone about how i'm doing? our next appointment isn't until june 6th and i know i can't wait that long.. I know benzo's are supposed to only be temporary but i feel like i need to have an increased dose while all of this court shit and girlfriend shit is happening and then ask to be tapered off of them when it all passes. I am stressed to the max and can't even function or have any fun.
 
I'm with you, man - I've gone back down to my lowered dose, and have the chills, the agoraphobia, the near-panic, et cetera. It's probably going to take me another 2 months to get down to zero, and then the real fun begins...

Alternatives: Phenibut hits the same receptors, but is arguably MORE addictive than benzos: it is, however, useful for a day or two in withdrawal, and legal. It can, though, cause some nasty headaches. Some say that Gabapentin and Pregabalin - anti-seizure meds - are also helpful. Of these, I've only tried phenibut: it feels like low-dose benzos, and might well fix you given the doses you're on - it's pretty inexpensive, too, but don't expect a high or full-blown benzo effect.

If you progress beyond anxiety to anything suggestive of severe withdrawal - tremors etc - then call your doc or ANY doc or go to an ER, taking evidence that you've been prescribed these drugs. I don't want to worry you even more: you've been on low doses for a short period of time, but it's not worth taking risks with benzo withdrawal.

And if you up your doses - well, you'll be back where you are right now, but worse, facing rebound anxiety and possible DTs if you run out. Being on a long-term taper is like living in a cage, as with any physical addiction: and they say it can take a long, long time to feel remotely normal again. Downs seem to give so much: but they can take more than any other drug, and once used daily for even a few weeks/months, always seem to inflict more anxiety once the half-life's expired than was there to begin with.

I have profound issues with anxiety and depression (not to mention substance abuse, obviously), and was fed benzos by a well-meaning grandparent as a kid, so taking them is like 'coming home': only now I want, desperately, to move out, and can't just quit without risking physical mayhem, maybe even seizure/death. Don't let it get that far if you can avoid it. Even tapering doesn't make for all that gentle a w/d, and it can take so long...

Good luck. Sometimes the easiest way to cope with anxiety, I find, is just to give up trying and lose myself in a shitty movie/novel/watch a whole dvd set of a TV series: distraction can be half the struggle.

Feel free to PM me if you want to chat.
 
I HAVE panic attacks i take paxil klonopin suboxone and i need a benzo it levels me out with out that i willl go nuts and also if u use them as directed they are not the devil and u will get used to them and u wont turn into a zombie ull jus have no ocd and no anxiety pm with questions if u want i kno alot about this sorta stuff cause im a mental case :) and i jus have exp with this like if u take srris srris or w/e they are dont go over 20 mg or ull have sexual effects i take 10 mg paxil i have no effects
 
ugh you do not wanna be on kpins long term. i mean, out of everything it's the better choice but, i ended up in the ER four times from WDs. i started on .5 and in five weeks was prescribed 5 mgs. i moved to NY where benzos are considered narcotics and was treated as a drug seeker and forced to go into WDs abruptly if i couldn't find a doctor to help me (which i couldn't for three weeks.) i was turned away from medical detox centers because i wasn't an 'abuser', i said if the legal dosage is 8mgs and i'm having to take 10mgs a day i need to get off this stuff NOW, maybe i'm not abusing it but my tolerance is building way too fast! they just told me to go to a psychiatrist the next day while i'm convulsing..

klonopin tolerance builds fast and high. i did go through an abusive stage.. where i snorted it to catch my breath faster.. but 98% of the time i ate them as accordingly. but i was in the same boat, i've had to buy xanax off the street to make it through the month/work even. no one knows/sells kpins on the streets.

i told my doctor and she put me on a 4mg dose of xanax a day and i still had to end up taking 10mg a day. she put me on an anti seizure/mood stabilizer med (which i dont take) and said that will help with panic attacks and put me back on two mgs of klonopin a day, coming from 5mgs. so you can only imagine how that is, i am defiitely abusing my pills right now due to lack of proper dosage (snorting them, hell i've considered banging them), but i'm also on an anti psychotic seroquel which when i have anxiety i take and it knocks me out perfectly.

this is why i asked for a sleep aid in the first place was so i didnt have to go on xanax. i would suggest you do the same. it's just self preservation. sonota, ambien, seroquel, they've all worked great when anxiety hits me all at once.

i mean they call them drug seekers but in reality we're all just trying to get through the day
 
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